Apparently, I was the only one who thought the Super Bowl ads were a heaping helping of *yawn* this year.  The Bud Light "horror movie hitchhiker" was, to me, the best of a decidedly mixed lot.  There wasn't a single all-time classic in the bunch, to my eyes.

But some of the ads have gotten plenty of attention in the days since Sunday.  No fewer than three of the SB commercials have engendered protests this week. 

(1)  Break me off a piece of that . . . whaaaaaaat??!:  The Snickers "Brokeback Mechanics" ad has caught some flak from various groups, including GLAAD, for being homophobic in its depiction of a same-sex "kiss."  In case you slept through it, two guys are working on a car; suddenly they're eating from opposite ends of the same candy bar.  (Yeah, I see that happening all the frickin time.  Do people eat them any other way?)  When they get to the last bite, well . . . contact.  They scream at each other like finalists in a Macaulay Culkin soundalike contest, and beg each other to "do something manly!"  Here's one idea: how about going inside to watch some football and leaving us the hell alone?

Is an apology necessary?  I can see GLAAD's point this time.  My default position is "people are looking for an excuse to be offended," but this grab bag of stereotypes and cliches was AT LEAST pretty close to the line.  Personally, I'm a little surprised Disney didn't announce a lawsuit against M&M/Mars for "borrowing" the spaghetti scene from "Lady and the Tramp."

http://news.enquirer.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20070208/ENT/702080326/1025

(Go ahead and click.  It's the Cincinnati Enquirer, not the National Enquirer.  It's not like I have *no* integrity, you know.)

(2)  If K-Fed can do my job, I'm aiming way too low:  The National Restaurant Association called for "rapper" Kevin Federline to apologize for his "Rollin' VIP" ad for Nationwide.  (I forgot who the ad was for until I saw it in the story.  Very effective, there, guys.)  They got their apology.

Is an apology necessary?  Yes, but not for this.  The NRA (not a 2nd Amendment support group) got its hairnets in a bunch over this ad, but why?  Fed-Ex (not a shipping company) was clearly having a few laughs at his own expense (to which, first, good on him, and second, join the club)--but how dare he insinuate that burger flippers and fry cooks, anywhere, any time, daydream about (gasp) having a better job?  Puh leeze.  The problem, to me, is that no apology was forthcoming from anyone about the "quality" of the rap that accompanied the ad.  (Feel free to add your own analogy, i.e.: "K-Fed is to Vanilla Ice as McDonald's is to Outback Steakhouse.")

http://www.celebrityspider.com/news/february07/article020307-5.html

(3)  Although, to be fair, if I had my name attached to that particular dance, I might off myself, too:  GM is under heavy fire from suicide-prevention groups for its "Robot" ad, in which a robot (oddly enough) dreams of losing its job on the assembly line, watching its life spiral out of control, and finally rolling off a bridge into the river below.  All of this is to the strains of Eric Carmen's "All By Myself."  (No, it's not a Celine Dion song.  "It's not an Eric Carmen song, either, damn it!"--S. Rachmaninoff.  Fair point, sir.  But are you that proud of it, yourself?)

Is an apology necessary?  I don't think so, but I may have missed the dramatic spike in the robotic suicide rate this week.  Are we also going to quit showing It's A Wonderful Life at Christmastime, since George Bailey concludes that suicide/nonexistence is the best way?  (He changes his mind, of course, but still . . . kind of like waking up from a dream, one might say.)  I usually don't trust corporate spokesdemons as far as I can shit straight up, but the GM flack du jour nailed it this time.  "C'mon.  It's a robot.  It's a fantasy."  (No, not all fantasies are good.)  The only people who might legitimately be driven to suicide upon viewing this ad are GM shareholders who stop to think that, with a year to get ready for the Super Bowl (aka Bring Your Fucking A-Game, Ad People), this was the best idea their PR folks could bring to life.  Hell, the college kid's ad was based on a better concept.  GM dropped the ball there, too, though.  The gender-reversed Bikini Car Wash might have worked--but if you have people getting wet and stripping down, shouldn't there be some effort made to recruit reasonably attractive ones?  I think there was a woman in the car who covered her eyes and said, "Tell me when it's over."  Amen, sister.

http://www.usatoday.com/money/advertising/admeter/2007-02-08-super-suicide-usat_x.htm?csp=34

Oh, yeah, one more point about the halftime show--to me, the best part of the whole broadcast.  (Note: not a typo.)  Some people appear to have been shocked--SHOCKED!--when Prince played guitar from behind a curtain (a neat visual, if used to better effect in--of all things--the second Austin Powers movie), and the resulting view could be (?) possibly interpreted (??) as somewhat (!!!) phallic.  I don't know about you, but I think that if these people have been paying any attention at all to music--specifically, Prince's music--in the last, oh, twenty-five years or so, and they're shocked by that . . . well, I'm not saying a word about the Easter Bunny, you know what I mean?

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/prince_super_bowl

Currently listening to:  "Stoned In Love," Chicane featuring Tom Jones