As Justin Ellis' Press Herald blog isn't up yet, I can only assume he's busy fightging the good fight for truth, and against compuuter hackers, and/or has waaay better things to do than add to my snarky commentary on the week's new releases at Videoport. So here is my half contribution to the weekly movie blog which, without Justin to volley them back at me, will, no doubt, just dribble away like sad, sarcastic little tennis balls...

My Blueberry Nights: "You know all the movies you were going to rent this week? Well, don't rent those. Rent this instead. The English language debut from brilliant Hong Kong auteur Wong Kar-Wai, 'My Blueberry Nights' is another in the long, deliriously-romantic line of films the man has graced us with. Seriously, if you've never seen 'Chungking Express', 'In the Mood for Love', its sequel '2046', or any of his earlier films (all available at Videoport, natch') you are not as happy, cultured, or smart as you should be. Thematically his films are concerned with offbeat, obsessive love, much like his main characters, and he creates worlds where even the oddest behavior seems to make a certain kind of woozy, languorous sense when love is involved. A cop eats only cans of pineapple stamped with the date he and his girlfriend first met, a pair of married (to other people) lonely souls go out for food in the rain and brush up against each other in the rooming house the share, a food stand girl breaks into, and brightens up, a lovesick policeman without him noticing. And now there's this, Wong's foray into America, with singer-turned-actress(?) Norah Jones playing a heartbroken woman who takes off on a picaresque quest to find some answers and runs into whimsical oddballs played by David Strathairn, Jude Law, Rachel Weisz, and Natalie Portman, each with some singular, lovelorn, tale to add to her store. I can guarantee this is more interesting than what you were going to take home."

Drillbit Taylor: "From the outer fringes of the Apatow laugh university comes this middling high school nerds vs. bullies tale. Cowritten by the excitingly talented Seth Rogen, with costarring bits from the funny
Mrs. Apatow Leslie Mann, and three near cameos from the brilliant Upright Citizens Brigade troupe, there's some pedigree here, but the whole enterprise remains sort of inert. Don't blame Owen Wilson, whose low-rent bodyguard provides his usual, welcome blend of goofy amiability to the proceedings, it's just all a little too rote and predictable to get much momentum going. There are the three teen leads who might as well have 'Superbad-Lite' t-shirts on the whole time, so closely do they adhere to the much more successful template thereof, and the whole central premise, which has been done, and done, and done better, at that (one of its more memorable forebears is referenced quickly in the only scene that made me laugh out loud, and that just because I'm a film geek...I'll let you figure out that one). I dunno, maybe Rogen was so happy to be working with legendary teen movie maven coscreenwriter John Hughes (writing under a pseudonym), that the was blinded to the fact that Hughes' peak was about thirty years ago. Not a bad film, but...eh."

Vantage Point: "A star-studded bunch witness a presidential shooting from several....vantage points! Get it? That means we're in for a 'Rashomon'-style 'what-is-really-the-truth-or-is-there-such-a-thing' roundelay of retellings. Which is all well and good when it's actually 'Rashomon', and being directed by Akira Kurosawa, but, when left in the hands of a writer who's only other credit is the upcoming remake of 'Kung Fu', well then you've just got the same indifferent movie retold about ten times, which is the buzz I'm hearing from Videoport coworkers who were more motivated to see it than I was. Pretty good cast though: Sigourney Weaver, Dennis Quaid, Forrest Whittaker, William Hurt, Matthew Fox. Only one way to find out..."

Meet the Browns: "Tyler Perry is back, and everybody's favorite (except for film critics) Christian cross dresser filmmaker has yet another rambunctiously-preachy film about good, solid, down home values, broad comic stereotypes, and, well, that's about it. Look, I don't begrudge a young(-ish) black filmmaker who can stay true to his vision, make his own films free of Hollywood power-brokering and interference, and appeal to a largely-neglected and/or condescended to segment of the moviegoing population, I really don't. But the guy's movies are amateurish, badly-written, and unforgivably pedantic and, (if Mr. Perry will allow me to blaspheme just a little bit) JESUS GOD WILL SOMEONE GIVE ANGELA BASSETT A DECENT MOVIE ROLE, JUST ONCE BEFORE SHE DIES! (john Sayles did once, in 'Sunshine State', but that was a while ago now). In this one, she gives it her best shot as a single mom who gets laid off and meets up with her father's crass-yet-country-wise family, and I am serious, if anyone can maintain her dignity in spite of a mess like this, it's the sweet, talented, formidable Angela. At least she and former Celtic Rick Fox make the most impossibly-gorgeous screen couple in recent memory."

'Mad Men'- season 1: "The twisted, ambitious world of the 60's era ad agency is the setting for this acclaimed TV series that hits the shelves today. Reviews good enough to be an HBO series, and, hey, there's Angel's kid Connor (Vincent Kartheiser) swapping the fighting togs for a suit and tie as one of the main antagonists. 'Angel' nerds unite (and you know whom I'm talking about, J-Man...)*"
*Justin, or 'J-Man',as I calls him, would no doubt go all ga-ga with me about the cancelled cult show 'Angel' here, although he'd probably mention that Connor was sort of a whiner.

Plus, Videoport brings you some serious eclecticism with this week's new arrivals:
The Guatemalan Handshake: "Festival favorite indie quirk-fest, starring cult musician/actor Will Oldham".
The Furies: "From the Criterion Collection, you've got firebrand Barbara Stanwyck battling creepy patriarch Walter Huston in the sweaty Old West".
'Bottom': "The complete series from Rik Mayall and Adrian Edmondson (of 'The Young Ones') as Richard 'Richie' Richard and Eddie Hitler, two dudes actually more anarchic and offensively-hilarious than Rik and Vyvyan."
'Pornography: The Secret History': "Just because..."

Look for Justin's blog at the Press Herald online.