Fellow Americans,

I know from many of the comments I've seen you leave that you are not all Democrats, and so I have shied away from my political views. I love you all and respect that there is more than one way to see the world.

However, I can not hide my elation that Barack Obama is our new president!

I have always been a fairly political person, and as you may have noticed, pretty liberal. When Bush was elected into office I was too young to vote and I remember feeling powerless and sad, before even knowing the damage he would quickly do to our country. Four years later, I registered to vote and got my voice out there, only to sit at home and watch each state, to my amazement, turn red, drinking the champagne I bought to celebrate his leaving the whitehouse to drown my sorrows instead of toasting the end of four bad years.

This year, when I first heard that Obama was running, I felt a new sense of hope. There was something about him that genuinely inspired me. Sure, he's good looking and has the sparkliest smile on the planet-- but seriously, the way he spoke, even when he stumbled, he always had something to say. I wanted to listen. I wanted to help. I wanted to see what he could do for us, and now I get to find out!

I am so proud to be alive to witness this monumental event. I always heard our parents telling stories about the sixties and how everyone came together and flooded the streets and fought for what they believed in. Now for the first time in my lifetime, I know what it feels like to be a part of something big. I feel like my vote counted, and I am proud of that.

I woke up yesterday morning and people were still waving Obama posters out their car windows, beaming. The footage I saw of people all across the world crying and celebrating in the streets was so breathtaking, I was tearing up all morning. It feels like a great weight has been lifted off of America, and a long needed change of consciousness seems to have swept over the world, and for the first time-it's very strange to me- I can feel it. I feel like it is affecting me, personally. My future, my destiny. My hope. I feel like it's a new era for me, after these last dark years, that the universe is re-arranging, and I can't wait to watch it all unfold!

I have to say, I feel bad for McCain. Watching his defeated speech was hard. I know a lot of people worked really hard for him and believed in him. I really actually like him as a person. He wasn't your average stuffy Republican, he did have a fresh attitude. I believed he probably could have done a good job. I'd like for him to be my grandpa and sit me on his lap and tell me all about being a prisoner of war. That shit is dedication!!

Fuck Palin. That's all I have to say about that.


One of the hardest parts about this election was Prop 8. I am really shocked. I understand that it's a hot button topic, and guess what? You don't have to be comfortable with homosexuality. But what the fuck does what two grown adults who love each other choose to do in their private lives have to do with you? Your voting against gay marraige is like protesting vegetarianism. It has nothing to do with you! If it's not hurting anyone, who gives a shit what other people do? For fuck's sake! I thought we had grown out of this homophobic bullshit.

I had a very unusual election night... I spent it dressed as a corpse, lying on an operating table!! haha I got to play dead on the set of CSI:NY. What a riot. They bruised me up real good and gave me a fat lip. Plus they made a fake head piece thing that made it look like I had a chunk of glass stuck in my head!

Everyone kept running into the makeup room giving updates on the election, and it was pretty clear Obama was takin' it. Then, as the night wore on, Prop 8 was not looking so good for our same sex couples... One woman on the set started talking about it and burst into tears. She told me she had just gotten married two weeks ago to her long term partner, and she was just crushed. I hugged her and tried to encourage her and then I realized I was made up like a dead person and realized I wasn't the most comforting sight on set.

That happened several times where I would be having an in depth conversation with someone and completely forget that I looked like a had the shit beaten out of me! ahahaaha! I went to get lunch and the awesome old mexican caterer guy turned around and nearly had a heart attack when he saw me!! He grabbed his chest and kind of gasped at me, and I was like "What!? What's wrong, are you okay?!!" and started coming towards him and he jumped back like he had seen a ghost!!! Then I remembered the autopsy stitches on my chest. And the fake fat lip. And the bruising all over my face. and I was like, "Oh... sorry..... I'll just have some.... rice."

So... Shooting has been SO MUCH FUN!!!! This was the friendliest set I've worked on thus far, and I met so many wonderful people... I am playing a struggling singer songwriter that sings in the subways of NY. I have shot three days of being dead so far, and tomorrow I'm shooting all the music scenes. The makeup department is really amazing. I couldn't believe how real it looked! No wonder mexican chef man was freaking out!

It's funny because on Halloween I had a bit of a rough night... I was "I dream Of Jeanie" for Katy Perry's Hollywood Halloween birthday party, and I has this long chiffon skirt. We were all getting ready in the bathroom and I tripped on myself and fell backwards into the bathtub!! I have a sliding glass door on my shower so there's a steel metal track on the edge of the tub and I hit the back of my legs on the side of the tub and my arm on the freakin soap dish. I was literally blackened all down the back of my legs and had an impression of a soap dish--ridges and all-- on the back of my arm... when I came in to the makeup department to get "dead" they were like "WOAH!! Those are amazing bruises! Can we take pictures for references? They're BEAUTIFUL!!!" HAHAHA!! I was like well at least I'm in character, right? Plus, ironically enough, I die in a bathtub in this episode!! LOL I have a strange gravitational pull towards bathtubs I guess...

I shot two autopsy type scenes and then the coolest ones of all.... the crime scene! They find me in a bathtub in my loft. The set they built was incredible-- it's supposed to be an old church that was converted into lofts (which is common in NY) . There were beautiful stained glass windows that reflected in the bath water and angels pained on the walls... a vintage gold vanity, claw foot bathtub, and a spiral staircase... if it were a real apartment in NY it'd cost about 2 mil... a little much for a "struggling musician," but that's the magic of television for ya. At least I get to go out in style, right? haha

The whole scene I had to have my eyes open, which was fun. Playing dead was fun! Then I had two detectives (Hill Harper and Robert Joy) come and poke at me and talk about me like i wasn't there... it was pretty surreal. Every time I've ever shot anything i'm always cracking up inside. I know I'm supposed to be in the moment and being a great actor and all, but when you're dead, you don't really have any serious acting to do except not blink and stay floppy. So I stayed floppy on the outside and was laughing so hard inside! In one of the scenes when I was on the autopsy table, Robert Joy who plays Dr. Sid Hammerback was supposed to be examining me, and in between shots I kept hearing him very quietly under his breath do a little "hhhhMMMMmmm" like he was having a revelation. I'm sure he was just warming up his voice to talk, but I kept giggling and everyone was asking me if I was okay... it was so quiet and I was the only one who cold hear him doing it so noone could figure out why I was laughing, which made me laugh even harder! He was very sweet to me, it was a lot of fun working with him. :)

Anyways. So tomorrow is my big music scene! Let's see how it goes! It should be an interesting day because I am supposed to be singing and playing guitar.... except that I don't fucking know how to play guitar... Haha! They called me and offered me the part assuming I could play guitar and when they asked if I could I sorta kinda said yes. Which is a lie.

Wish me luck!

Love you all!

X Beeg Keess, x leetle keess, X beeg Keess, o leetle hug, O Beeg Hug
Bonnie