I feel fortunate to have gotten into hardcore at a relatively young age. Especially in a town that never had any sort of a 'new school' hardcore scene until late '96/early '97. Being into both punk and metal, hardcore seemed like perfection to me. The politics and social relevance of punk rock, mixed with the more aggressive sounds of metal moved me like nothing I had ever heard. At age 13, I discovered Minor Threat and Gorilla Biscuits, and saw how easily straight edge applied to my life in spite of the things a lot of my friends were slowly beginning to experiment with. MT and GB soon led to Inside Out and Born Against, which eventually led to Earth Crisis and Undertow. I went to a lot of punk shows in Portland as an early teen. There were some great bands around like National Guard, Knuckleheads, Sputnik and more, but New Year's Eve of 96/97 saw National Guard become Backside Disaster. To me, they pretty much sounded like Strife at the time, but it was awesome to see a local band develop a sound I had really been getting into over the last few years. Tours finally started coming through Portland and the amount of local bands steadily increased. If you were to believe what was written in an MRR scene report, those of us that kind of split off from the punk scene were a bunch of bat wielding hardline kids; a rather amusing implication if you were to actually talk to any of us. One of the first out of town bands to make regular trips to play Portland was Trial. From the very first time I saw them play, I could not get enough of them. The passion, urgency, intelligence and intensity they presented on stage was unparalelled in my eyes. In the 9 years that it's been since I first saw them play, their records have never left my rotation of listening cycle. Each and everytime I saw Trial play, whether it was Portland or Seattle, was more of an emotional experience than a show for me. This was all at a time when I was making 3 to 4 trips to Seattle a month with my friend Conrad. We'd drive up just to hang out and go to shows. I made a lot of good friends up there and those times are often what I would refer to as the 'golden days.' During one of my girlfriend's visits from New Jersey in August of '99, I drove her up to Auburn, WA for a Trial show at the Annex. This was to be Trial's last show before leaving for tour, and it turned out to be their last show ever in the Northwest. Trial broke up in early 2000 while on tour in Europe.My band, The Dead Unknown, got together in January of 2000 and played our first show on April 1, 2000 (also Backside Disaster's last show ever). One of my only disappointments (if that's really even the proper word) with my band was that we never got to play with Trial; never got to share that experience with the band that influenced me like no other had. Having become friends with both Timm and Greg over the years, I made it a regular habit to badger them about a reunion/final show since the band never saw a proper sendoff in their own hometown. I don't think the elation that I felt when informed that a reunion show was looming on the horizon can ever possibly be measured. Especially the night that Timm called me to ask if The Dead Unknown would like to play the show.

The anticipation of this show felt like a high, and I rode that high for months. Having the show happen 5 days after my 26th birthday just made it seem even more special for some reason. I got to see so many old NWHC friends that night, including Fife Crew back in full effect. Seemed like nothing could drag down my mood that night. Our set (last one ever with the Dwizz) went exceptionally well. We played tight and had a great time doing so. Everything else became downtime before Trial for me. As the intro to "Are These Our Lives?" played over the p.a., my heart began to race. I'd been waiting 6 long years for this night and all the emotions I used to feel at Trial shows came back like a torrent. That show and night were nothing less than perfection for me. Three of the people I could never face life without were in attendance with me and the band that had challenged me to become a more clear thinker hadn't missed a beat in their years of seperation. I truly don't think any show will ever top the night of October 9, 2005 in my head and in my heart.

But after they ended their set with "This Is Not a Trend" just like they always used to, something was still nagging me. This was not the end for Trial. They had two reunion shows in Europe coming up. I knew I had to be there. I would forever regret not making every effort possible to get there. An amazing individual offered to loan me the money it would take to get there, but I ended up getting a loan against the equity of my car. With barely a month until the shows and $2500 later, my (now ex) girlfriend and I were ready to go to Europe.

Portland -> Dallas -> Gatwick -> Central London

We arrived and found the club with plenty of time to spare. We eventually found Trial and it was nice to see friends in a foreign land. We were both extremely tired from our trip and it's complete lack of real sleep, but that didn't mean much to me once Trial began to play. Even though I seemed to be the only person there that knew all of the songs that came out before "Are These Our Lives?," kids went nuts and it was almost as much fun as the Seattle....ALMOST! I got a crash course in British currency that night as I helped run the Trial merch table just before and after their set. I swear I'll flip my shit if America ever converts to coins in place of small bills.

After the show, we all crammed into a van and and were driven up to Luton airport about an hour north of where the show was. It was about 3 am and the airport was dead aside from 8 tired Americans. After a few hours of minimal sleep and an epic sweatshirt race between Timm and Greg, we boarded a flight bound for Budapest. After landing, the ex and I were taken to a hostel as we had no actual plans of where we were going to stay beforehand. We got picked up and taken to the club with plenty of time still left to hang out before the show. It was great to see friends in Undying there (they also played a great set that night). Kids from all over Europe were at this show in Budapest. I heard so many different languages being spoken that night, and it was awesome to see so many diverse national backgrounds being represented at one show. The energy in that room during Trial's set was pretty intense. From first song to last, kids were all over the place having a good time. Although the reunited Turmoil brought out a little bit of it, I haven't really gone nuts at a show since Trial broke up. Each one of those three shows inspired these faulty knees to stage dive and lose my shit like I haven't in many years. Once Trial played their final song, a wealth of uncontrollable emotion swept over me. In unprecedented fashion, I stood there and I cried like a baby that had just had it's favorite blanket ripped from its arms.

We met some truly great people while in Europe like Jim and Dave in London, and Zoli and Norbi in Budapest. These people went out of their way to accommodate us and help us feel comfortable when we were so far away from home, and I can't thank them enough.

Budapest -> London Heathrow -> Chicago -> Portland

Even though I've attempted it numerous times, Trial has meant more to me than I could ever possibly put into words. It's taken me 3 months just to be able to attempt to put down all of these thoughts. I feel fortunate to have had the opportunity to get to know the members of Trial as friends. A couple of them being friends that I'm in contact with on a very regular basis. Hardcore has become very stagnant and boring for me as of late, but bands like Trial and the members it contained are what keep me holding onto the hope that someday it will become fun and inspiring for me again. To Trial and its members, thank you! You can never possibly know how much your band and your friendship and inspiration has meant to me over the years. I have so many amazing memories tied to Trial that I will never forget; from the first time the band played Portland all the way up through hanging out in Europe and the reunion shows. My eyes still sometimes well up with tears when listening to those records and thinking of the last time Trial ever played. Thank you...those words aren't tattooed on my arm for nothing.