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Tony Blogtana

Tony Blogtana


Last Updated: 11/17/2009

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Gender: Male
Status: Married
Age: 34
Sign: Leo

City: The ATL
State: Georgia

Who Gives Kudos:

The First S.. (2)
Malove (2)
Tricky T Fl.. (2)
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Chris (2)
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myluvsbetter (2)
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Tuesday, March 07, 2006 

Current mood:  sick
Category: Romance and Relationships

Love is alot like basketball.... 
but, in hoops, people actually BLAME THEMSELVES whenever they take a bad shot
[they don't blame their poor shot selection on the crowd being too loud or the wind blowing].

Lately, I've seen alotta ladies blogging about guys that're JERKS....   but, in doing so,
NOBODY's bothered to TAKE ACCOUNTABILITY for the poor decisions that they made.
Ladies wanna blame the jerk, instead of blaming themselves for choosing the jerk!!!!
"I didn't know he was a jerk, when I met him" is the most popular excuse for THEIR error.

Alotta women get enraged when they hear me say this & they always comeback asking me
 "Do you blame yourself, whenever you choose a BAD woman"?!

And my answer to that question is: "YES, I do"!!!!
I blame myself [not them] b-cuz I'm the dumb fuck who chose the woman!!!!
I DON'T shift the blame & say, "I'm innocent....   I didn't know that she was NO GOOD.
She played the nice girl role when I met her, so how was I supposed to know"?!

Ummmm....  that's the whole point of taking the time to get to know somebody WELL 1st.
That's why it's key to establish a strong friendship as the foundation for a lasting romance
[instead of saying, "Uh oh, I can't date this person anymore b-cuz we're friends now"].

What happens TOO OFTEN is that people will become so infatuated with someone,
that they neglect the importance of building a friendship [they see friendship as the plague].
Most people wannabe lovers 1st & [if everything fails] they'll try to be friends later....
& that's a recipe for disaster in romance.

Most women constantly approach love in a manner that IGNORES the recipe for success....
& then, they blame the ingredients when the dish DOESN'T taste the way that it should
[rather than blaming the cook for using vinegar instead of spring water].

Women frequently say that a GOOD man is hard to find....   but, that's NOT true!!!!
It only seems this way, b-cuz the dating realm ISN'T designed to help good men succeed &
this fact is evident in the 2 most popular romantic cliches that women say every day:
"Nice guys finish last" & "Opposites attract"!!!! 

"Nice guys finish last" is just a pitiful line that women use to explain the sickness of why
they're attracted to jackasses in the 1st place....  
& "Opposites attract" is simply the lame excuse that good women use to justify why
they get into relationships with the jackasses that I just mentioned.

But, the irony's that BOTH cliches send the exact same message to every GOOD man:
"Women that're kind, loving, & genuine DON'T fall for men with those traits".
So, good guys are forced to either settle for the reward of being praised in Myspace bulletins
[with titles like "To All Of The Nice Guys"] or become the jerk who'll get the girls!!!!
Which leads to my next issue....   women place RIDICULOUS expectations on good men!!
Then, they wonder why alotta men choose to go the asshole route instead of the honest one.

Women tell the GOOD guy NOT to change who he is, despite hearing the cliches....
they tell him to stay true, while his female friends overlook him & sleep with the jackasses.
He's asked to be patient through his loneliness, while the jackasses get to fuck in their prime.
Ladies want him to understand when a jackass turns them into a woman that can't trust again.
And through all of this, he's still expected to keep his sanity while seeing women diss guys for
being virgins, never being in a serious relationship, or NOT having enough sexual experience!!!

He's gotta fight through the storm of SEX & THE CITY mentalities,
where women are proud to be like Carrie Bradshaw [dissing every good guy to chase a Big].
He's also gotta accept that ladies are content with identifying their lives with hers,
rather than recognizing the flaws of self-sabotage & doing something to change the pattern.

He's supposed to be forgiving enough to NOT think badly of a woman,
if she chose to sleep with alotta jackasses between age 18-25....
he can't complain when she won't do the same sex acts with him, that she did with an asshole.
He's supposed to pick up the damaged pieces, after the jackasses destroyed the pure thing.

The good guy ISN'T supposed to put pressure on a woman to make a decision when
she's confused about who she REALLY wants to be with b-cuz she's dating 5 guys @ 1x
[he's supposed to hang in there while feeling powerless & take the risk of looking like a fool].

When women say that "ALL MEN ARE DOGS"....
he's placed with the burden of having to prove that he's NOT like the guys in her past
[even though alotta women won't allow themselves to trust another man, regardless].

When women don't want the good guy, they try to let him down easy & give him NONE....
but, they often won't drop a jerk without giving him a tryout in bed 1st.

And all the while, a good guy's gottabe worried about whether a woman's gonna cheat on him
[when he finally finds love] & say that she fucked another guy b-cuz:
1. "I was afraid",
2. "You're too nice & I didn't know how to handle it", or
3. "This is the 1st time that a man's treated me this well & I needed to know if I loved you".

I remember what it was like when I had nobody & wished that I could find someone genuine.
The blowjobs & one-night stands just COULDN'T fill the void of NOT having true love.
I won't forget how it used to fuck with my head whenever women would be interested in me,
up until the point that I did something nice for them....
or how jealous I was of the abusive guys that COULDN'T beat a woman outta loving them!!!!
It wasn't selfish of me to want everything that the assholes had & I knew why I didn't have it.

My problem was simple....
I WASN'T satisfying my hunger for love, b-cuz I kept choosing BAD cooks!!!!
I was picking women that insisted on using vinegar instead of spring water to make romance
& it was MY FAULT [nobody else's].

Eventually, I got tired of trying to make women see that a good guy is what they needed.
I got sick of women sweating my nuts, whenever I chose to be the jerk &
feeding me "platonic" bullshit upon realizing that I was somebody who'd treat them well. 
So, I took matters into my own hands....

I accepted my limitations [that I DON'T have the power to change what an asshole had done]
& focused my attentions toward finding the Mrs. Right who wanted to love me from Day 1. 
Cuz in the end, women will always say they wannabe treated like queens while chasing dicks
& the lady that ya fall in love with is the ONLY one who REALLY deserves royal treatment.

Currently listening:
Take This to Your Grave
By Fall Out Boy
Release date: 06 May, 2003
7:02 PM
 
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The First Space by the greatest fucking man alive

 
Great blog my man....You hit the nail on the head.....
 
Posted by The First Space by the greatest fucking man alive on Tuesday, March 07, 2006 - 7:18 PM
[Reply to this] 
Tony Blogtana
Tony Blogtana

 
Thanks.... I tried my best.  In the middle of writing this, I couldn't help but feel sorry for the MANY good guys that're out there who'd know that what I've said [about what they're going through] is factual.

I don't have the power to change every woman's approach to men....   but, I thought that it was important for ladies to know why they encounter so many jerks who just don't give a fuck.

BTW - that Chilly Willy graphic is the monster!!!!
 
Posted by Tony Blogtana on Wednesday, March 08, 2006 - 5:22 AM
[Reply to this] 
The First Space by the greatest fucking man alive

 
Yeah Chilly is the shit....As for the other I been on both sides of the coin,being the good guy and the jerk....I found that if I mixed the 2 together I got better results from women....
 
Posted by The First Space by the greatest fucking man alive on Wednesday, March 08, 2006 - 9:59 PM
[Reply to this] 
The Ian

 
He always does!
 
Posted by The Ian on Tuesday, March 07, 2006 - 9:23 PM
[Reply to this] 
Tony Blogtana
Tony Blogtana

 

That's definitely a compliment, coming from you [cuz you're one of the hardest to impress].


 
Posted by Tony Blogtana on Wednesday, March 08, 2006 - 5:21 AM
[Reply to this] 
Monique & Nicky

 

Very interesting! Take a look at my blog entitled "Jerks Love Me"

Nicky


 
Posted by Monique & Nicky on Tuesday, March 07, 2006 - 7:38 PM
[Reply to this] 
Tony Blogtana
Tony Blogtana

 
Will do.
 
Posted by Tony Blogtana on Tuesday, March 07, 2006 - 8:12 PM
[Reply to this] 
La Yoli
Yoli M

 

Ok, now how did you get so smart?  Your mama must be a very proud lady.  Kudo's to you.

This mentality stretches beyond relationships, it also is to be applied towards, happiness, personal growth, friends, and careers.  Excuses are a great sign of weakness.

Like right now, my weak ass needs to get off myspace and make it to the office so I can stop whining about monay.


 
Posted by La Yoli on Tuesday, March 07, 2006 - 7:42 PM
[Reply to this] 
Tony Blogtana
Tony Blogtana

 

Nah, my mom goes outta her way to say that I'm not doing what she thinks that I should be. 


 
Posted by Tony Blogtana on Tuesday, March 07, 2006 - 9:18 PM
[Reply to this] 
Chris

 
Sounds like my parents lol.
 
Posted by Chris on Tuesday, March 07, 2006 - 9:34 PM
[Reply to this] 
Malove

 
This is a great blog... but one point I think you didn't mention is that many women have this really fucked up fixation with trying to "save" fucked up men. They have these visions of being some sort of angel that through the magic of their love, can turn a troubled man around so he can finally reach his full potential and be forever grateful and appreciative. Nice guys don't need fixing - so these women feel useless and powerless when dealing with them. The problem with this kind of quest is that MEN WON'T CHANGE UNLESS THEY WANT TO AND NO MATTER HOW MUCH YOU LOVE THEM, THAT ALONE IS NOT ENOUGH. Women have to realize that when the men they love do things and treat them in ways they don't like and don't the guys won't make the effort to change, they really have only two viable choices: LEAVE HIM or PUT UP WITH IT. Bitching about it won't change him, staying with him won't change him, loving him won't change him, nagging won't change him, passive/aggressive manipulation won't change him... you will ALWAYS be dealing with the same issues. And it's very unlikely that when/if he does decide to change, he WON'T be with YOU.

I say this to women because they're the ones with the savior fixation most often, but the same thing applies to men. Don't waste your time trying to tame, save or otherwise change your partner. Divert your energy to something constructive instead.
 
Posted by Malove on Tuesday, March 07, 2006 - 8:00 PM
[Reply to this] 
Tony Blogtana
Tony Blogtana

 
Ya know what....   that was a MAJOR point that I was thinking about, while driving this AM & neglected to include in my blog.  So, thank you for bringing this up.

You covered every base on that point too & it's something that I think alotta women know, but REFUSE to accept.  It's sad b-cuz alotta women waste their most precious years foolishly believing that they have the power to change a man.
 
Posted by Tony Blogtana on Tuesday, March 07, 2006 - 8:22 PM
[Reply to this] 
Tricky T Flash

 

wow emery...kudos to you on this one.

i am not the type of woman that is attracted to jerks or turned off by nice guys.  but i do find that i have to fight to keep from closing up when i do meet a nice guy...because i'm always suspicious he's going to turn out like one of the many jerks i have encountered.  it's hard to find that balance between not being niave to peoples intentions and also being open so that you can let the right person in.

good stuff...


 
Posted by Tricky T Flash on Tuesday, March 07, 2006 - 8:00 PM
[Reply to this] 
Tony Blogtana
Tony Blogtana

 

Alotta ladies AREN'T gonna wanna hear this....  but, the easiest way to figure out whether someone's REALLY a nice guy or just another jerk is to HOLDOUT!!!! 

There are plenty of jerks in the world that're willing to walk on egg shells, until they get some sex....   but, few of them are willing to court a woman for an extended period WITHOUT getting sumthin'.

Alotta women USE sex as a way to establish commitment....   they'll like a guy, see what he's all about for a few days/weeks, sleep with him, & THEN wakeup the next morning acting like their sexcapade means that they're now in an EXCLUSIVE relationship with him [& that's another recipe for disaster].

What women should do instead [when they like a guy] is establish a friendship 1st, take some time to see what kinda FRIEND he is, graduate to a relationship, wait him out to see if he respects your virtue, & THEN sleep with him after he's finally proven himself over the course of time.

Unfortunately, women often complicate things by choosing to get their rocks off with the assholes [because, like the assholes, ladies get frustrated about NOT getting sex].


 
Posted by Tony Blogtana on Tuesday, March 07, 2006 - 8:49 PM
[Reply to this] 
Tricky T Flash

 

u are definitely right about that one.  i've encountered many guys who were willing to kiss my ass til I gave it up...and the second i did...the flipped the script and start acting like complete a**holes.  a friendship is definitely the basis for anything lasting...and it takes awhile to get to that point.  you can't know someone in just a few weeks or even months...no matter how good of chemistry you have.

something i realized after reading this.  i have a tendency to keep going on dates with other guys even after i've found one i really like and is good to me...it's not because i necessarily want to date anyone else...but i'm afraid that he is going to turn out to be an a**hole so i "keep my options open".  i think i'm going to try the opposite from now on...it will probably only make my life a little less complicated...hah!


 
Posted by Tricky T Flash on Wednesday, March 08, 2006 - 2:24 PM
[Reply to this] 
Tony Blogtana
Tony Blogtana

 
"You keep speaking of this good man; a good man right now is an asshole/actor waiting for his chance to shine to fulfill the prophecy as a villain".

That's NOT true....   I can say that with 100% certainty based on alotta guys that I know & the conversations that we've had about women.

That'd be exactly like if men ran around saying, "Every good woman right now is a bitch/actress just waiting for her chance to fulfill the prophecy of a scandalous whore who sleeps with the neighborhood".

Statements like that are a slap in the face of the many GOOD people that're out here....   & if people REALLY believe these things, then it should be easy to see why a genuine guy wouldn't see the point of continuing to be kind to women.  Basically, you're already saying that it DOESN'T matter if he DOESN'T have a cheating bone in his body----your mind's already made up that he's gonnabe a villain anyway.  This kinda thing is what leads women to cheat on a man [when he's done NOTHING wrong] & they justify hurting him, by saying, "Well, you were gonna eventually do it to me".

Ladies, true love WON'T ever find you unless you're someone that's willing to give people the LEGITIMATE chance to love you.

A guy can't expect to find a good woman, when he's running around calling all women whores-in-waiting....   his vision will always be clouded, b-cuz he refuses to see them as anything else.
 
Posted by Tony Blogtana on Tuesday, March 07, 2006 - 9:12 PM
[Reply to this] 
Chris

 
Another point is that women are NATURALLY attracted to the jerks. Jerks come off or are  perceived as a being more aggressive, stronger, dominant. Its natural selection and most women cant overcome that primal urge. They got all hot and bothered but, they fail to see that a month or 2 down the road there gonna be unhappy. They constantly complain that its something they cant change .If a guy can overcome testosterone and date someone who isn't Miss America shouldn't women be able to do the same. If your relying on instincts then your just going for the same thing your complaining about. Its the same with men. If we rely on instincts were going for what attracts us the most which is usually whatever women our dicks like. If we act the same way women do then were labeled as assholes. Let a women do it and its normal. I say we nice guys start taking a stand. Stop listening for 6 or 7 months on end about how much of a jerk he is and tell them exactly how it is. You chose him we didn't. If you want someone like us then date us. If you ain't gonna leave him the shut up and deal with it. If your not going to work to solve the situation then we don't wanna hear it. Why should we sit here and be someones emotional crutch while we sit and have our feelings hurt ? I know there are a lot of good women out there and I'm not directing these statements towards those of you who are truly good women. I just sick of all these whiners who stay with the jerks and run and seek comfort from the nice guys.
 
Posted by Chris on Tuesday, March 07, 2006 - 9:08 PM
[Reply to this] 
Tony Blogtana
Tony Blogtana

 
"Why should we sit here and be someones emotional crutch while we sit and have our feelings hurt"?

You're right about that....   I finally got sick of that shit, shortly after I turned 21.  I realized what was happening & decided put an end to it immediately.

"I just sick of all these whiners who stay with the jerks and run and seek comfort from the nice guys".

I hate that shit.  That runs a close 2nd to infidelity.

"women are NATURALLY attracted to the jerks. Jerks come off or are  perceived as a being more aggressive, stronger, dominant. Its natural selection and most women cant overcome that primal urge".

But, women don't even like the buff guys that're nice....   they'll still go for the jackass!!!!

However, I agree that women are naturally attracted to jerks [b-cuz the traits that women are attracted to are usually the ones that jerks have].

LOOKS - most good-looking guys know it & milk that shit for everything that it's worth.  Alotta women will make fools of themselves, when they think somebody's cute.  He might be the biggest dickhead in the world, but she'll sleep with him & say, "I didn't want it to be a complete waste....  he was so cute".

MONEY - rich guys have a tendency to be assholes, b-cuz they deal with snakes every day when it comes to business & they're used to people kissing their ass just b-cuz they've got $$.

STRENGTH - women equate size with strength....   but, in the NFL, little Antoine Winfield will tear your head off @ 5'9", 180 lbs. faster than guys that're twice his size!!!!  Unfortunately, women don't feel safe unless they're with a big guy whose knees & groin area will always be exposed in a street fight.
 
Posted by Tony Blogtana on Wednesday, March 08, 2006 - 1:02 PM
[Reply to this] 
Tony Blogtana
Tony Blogtana

 

You're right about everything that you said [& I frequently say that "You are who ya date" too].


 
Posted by Tony Blogtana on Tuesday, March 07, 2006 - 10:25 PM
[Reply to this] 
Ashley

 

you are right, i shoulda not picked the jerk i was with last. he was an asshole who didn't show that he cared about me. but now he's hatin it cuz i gotta new man and refuse to hook up with him anymore, lol

overall tho, really good blog. the other sex & the city mentality that men have to fight is women (like i used to be like, oh, a month ago, before i met my new man. now i can't imagine even cheatin on him cuz i think for the first time i'm in love...) who are like samantha who just use and abuse men. that's how i was for a long time, and it threw off my new man, cuz i wouldn't beg him to kiss me or cuddle. then one night, he just up and is like "how come you always turn your back to me after we have sex?!" and i'm like "cuz no man ever wanted to cuddle or talk to me after sex, so i just assumed that's how all of you were." he's changed my views about a lot of things like that, so i guess it is possible to change a samantha into a charlotte


 
Posted by Ashley on Tuesday, March 07, 2006 - 8:52 PM
[Reply to this] 
Tony Blogtana
Tony Blogtana

 

 Miranda's the psycho chick that every man wants to avoid.

 Samantha's the fuck buddy that every guy's hoping to meet, until he encounters the woman that he wants to marry or settle down with.

 Carrie's the silly kinda woman that the good guys DON'T ever wanna get mixed up with.

 Charlotte's the perfect woman that every guy wants to marry.

 Big is the defender of men worldwide using poetic justice as his weapon of choice.


 
Posted by Tony Blogtana on Wednesday, March 08, 2006 - 3:28 AM
[Reply to this] 
That's MR Topher to you...

 

hey i reposted and linked this...

one of the best reads in a long time...

can't help but feel like i was the nice guy... that turned into the jerk because that was how i could get the girls.... then in recent times i've tried to become the nice guy in hopes that a woman might realize what you're pointing out.. it's worth chancing vs. being the jerk forever....


 
Posted by That's MR Topher to you... on Tuesday, March 07, 2006 - 8:55 PM
[Reply to this] 
Tony Blogtana
Tony Blogtana

 
Just save the nice guy that's inside of you for a woman that deserves it....  but, listen very carefully to what women say that they want!!!!

For every 99 women that say "I don't wannabe in a serious relationship, right now"....   you'll always meet 1 woman that says "I'm looking for a boyfriend".

You wanna find a woman that has her mind right [instead of waiting for a woman to makeup her mind].

Alotta women expect a guy to work overtime just to convince her that he's worth being in a relationship with & then, they want him to kick the courtship into overdrive as soon as she's made up her mind.  But, by that time, you're usually too burned out from chasing her & competing with her other suitors.

It's so much more fulfilling when you meet a woman that says "I'm ready for somebody like you" & she's willing to give you a legitimate chance to prove yourself WITHOUT feeling the need to keep other guys in the picture that she'll be comparing you against.

If a woman's confused about romance when she's SINGLE, then imagine how fucked up she's gonnabe when it's time to walk down the aisle [she might get cold feet @ the last minute].  Save the nice guy for women that AREN'T afraid to tell you exactly what it is that they want [instead of trying to be nice to a bunch of women that are likely to NEVER come around, b-cuz they became infatuated with some jerk].
 
Posted by Tony Blogtana on Tuesday, March 07, 2006 - 9:43 PM
[Reply to this] 
Tony Blogtana
Tony Blogtana

 
"Realtionships in a whole dont really begin to take effect till about 6 months or so when you really let your ego gaurd down. So we all get in this little mascarade of short little dates and have to come up with some excuse why it didnt work".

I think that people do this, b-cuz they approach relationships like a night @ the casino.

The average person will win a little bit of cash & decide to keep on playing [hoping to BETTER their earnings] instead of quitting while they're ahead.

Well, in relationships, when ladies find a good guy....   they immediately tell themselves, "Sure, he's nice....   but, there's gottabe somebody BETTER in the world, than this one" & then start thinking of excuses to continue searching [instead of being happy with who they've found]. 

I guess that's why they call it GAMBLING....   the game's dangerously addictive & most people are lucky to walk away WITHOUT losing everything.
 
Posted by Tony Blogtana on Wednesday, March 08, 2006 - 5:14 AM
[Reply to this] 
Ms Beautiful Soul

 

Yeah I blame myself too when I pick a fucker!

I agree that friendship is the foundation for any romatic relationship. You wouldn't go giving a stranger your bank card to go and do as they please, so why give someone you don't know your body without even establishing a friendship first?


 
Posted by Ms Beautiful Soul on Tuesday, March 07, 2006 - 11:03 PM
[Reply to this] 
Tony Blogtana
Tony Blogtana

 
Exactly....   you should @ least take the time to make sure that the person's gonna appreciate what it is that you're giving [before you give it to them].

But, people would rather fuck 1st & hope that they appreciate it later.
 
Posted by Tony Blogtana on Wednesday, March 08, 2006 - 3:33 AM
[Reply to this] 
Tiny Phoenix

 
While I do agree with all of your points, I think the same situations can and do apply to men as well.

Men put incredibly high expectations on women.
I like a woman with meat on their bones....yet every male magazine/porn/advertising aimed at men show women with borderline anorexia and in no way represent the natural female form.

I want a good girl who doesn't fuck around.  Yet when they begin to date a woman they often put incredible pressure on her to do just that, with them.

I'm not saying we as female aren't incredibly indecisive, i'll be the first to admit that.  but the coin flips both ways....

 
Posted by Tiny Phoenix on Wednesday, March 08, 2006 - 2:34 AM
[Reply to this] 
Tony Blogtana
Tony Blogtana

 
My mom & I had a debate about this issue once....   she's a feminist & wasn't trying to hear me @ 1st.  But, then, I made a point that even she had to agree with.

I told her that you can't even blame MEN for the image of women in magazines & on film.

When Hugh Hefner was picking the playmates for his publication....   a woman like Anna Nicole Smith could win Playmate of the Year even though she was a plus-size model.  Voluptuous women could actually make it in the magazine & men were buying it.  Hefner also was AGAINST promoting hardcore XXX in his magazine.

But, ever since Hef turned over control of the magazine to HIS DAUGHTER....   the models that SHE selects to be in Playboy have gotten skinnier & skinnier!!!!  And when you interview her about her standards----she's always defending the NEW image that SHE wants the magazine to have.  Furthermore, she's started doing what her father refused to do [she promotes hardcore XXX movies in Playboy].

If you look @ a show like America's Next Top Model, where WOMEN like Tyra Banks & Janice Dickinson are in control and have the power to radically change the image of models....  these women NEVER do anything with the opportunity!!!!  They'll choose their token plus-size girl just to have one in the competition & then, they rip her for being too big later on!!!!  And when it's all said & done, they end up picking another skinny girl to be the next top model.  Men AREN'T telling Janice to rip into these girls for being bigger!!!!

So, again, women AREN'T exactly doing what they COULD do to change things when they have the opportunity.

There once was a time when the rubenesque look was preferred [the artwork from different periods proves this]....  so, you can't blame everything on the men.

As for wanting a good girl that doesn't fuck around....   if he's putting pressure on you to do it, then what does that tell you about HIM????  There are plenty of men that will respect a woman for choosing to keep her legs closed.  Unfortunately, women think that a guy must be GAY if he isn't going outta his way to make out with her or get into her pants.
 
Posted by Tony Blogtana on Wednesday, March 08, 2006 - 3:11 AM
[Reply to this] 
CMT♥CMT

 

I have thought about this subject as well and I know that i do this in every relationship. I guess I just think well maybe if he loves me he wont be such a jerk. I have proved myself wrong everytime and then i kick myself for passing by the "friend" and then on to the next lasme ass no working loser that i just happen to want to love being fresh out of a relationship I know that things have to change in my perspective i can see the light and am looking forward to getting to know the real me and even considering a move far far far away from the person i use to be. I now see how true the things you say are had this blog been 3 weeks ago I am afraid that I would have a battle of witts with you. I see the disaster I have made for myself. I see if i had spent some time just finding out who he was and what he was like before jumping into this with my whole heart i would have maybe realized that he may never love me...and i know that I deserve that you would think that after 5 years someone would but thats why i had to walk away. I respect you for having the guts to really tell us what it is guys think. Although it hurts like hell I know that i have made a change for the best and that i can be responsiable for the choice only I made.

~destiny~


 
Posted by CMT♥CMT on Wednesday, March 08, 2006 - 5:08 AM
[Reply to this] 
Tony Blogtana
Tony Blogtana

 

"I respect you for having the guts to really tell us what it is guys think".

Women need to know wussup....    that being a good guy is like jumping off The Titanic, when every life boat is designated "FOR JERKS ONLY". 

You've gottabe ahelluva swimmer just to survive & if you're not....   then, you're either gonna drown or succumb to the cold [whichever comes 1st].


 
Posted by Tony Blogtana on Wednesday, March 08, 2006 - 5:50 AM
[Reply to this] 
myluvsbetter

 

This blog is sooo true in so many ways!!  Know I have to say that while I am not this girl anymore, I most definitely was at one point. I went with the looser, unfortunately he was a really mean looser, and I did this at a rather young age. But I after I got done letting him drag me down for a couple years, I learned a lot from him. When I walked away from him finally I realized that lust doesn't equal love, and conceitedness does not equal confidence. One of my girls brought there new man over to hang out and meet me and my husband a few weeks ago. You could tell that he was one of those guy with the front going on. We got into a conversation about something and referred to me and my husband as "you and your bitch". Well first I politely told him that I'm not a bitch, I'm his wife, nor am I'm a dog, I walk on two legs, not four.  He kind of gave me this dumb ass look and said, it's just an expression.  I said, "yeah I know, and it might be attractive to some young ass girl,    but I'm a grown woman, and I don't find it sexy or amusing to be referred to as a bitch."   

 My thinking is, my own damn husband doesn't refer to me as a bitch, not unless he wants to be sleepin alone!! And yes I do realize that I AM a bitch. But don't come into my house and sit there having a conversation with my husband in with your little fake ass hard front.  Now of course the room got pretty silent for a sec, until my husband started laughing and said, "damn she pulled your card!!". He apologized to me, and I said your cool, just chill with that shit. 

I can't stand to see all the woman out here now a days that find it attractive for men to talk to them like that. I want a man thats gonna treat me like I'm his queen, not his bitch!! I definitely give you tons of kudos for this one.


 
Posted by myluvsbetter on Wednesday, March 08, 2006 - 7:17 AM
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Tony Blogtana
Tony Blogtana

 
Well, I've gotta give your husband credit for controlling his anger ahelluvalot better than me....   b-cuz I woulda grabbed a chair or bottle & broke the shit over that guy's head for saying that!!!!
 
Posted by Tony Blogtana on Thursday, March 09, 2006 - 4:20 AM
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myluvsbetter

 
I know that he wanted to but, with three babies running around that's not really an option. Besides the reality is, really he's just some young ass guy that's still in that mind frame of the Biggie saying "just me and my bitch". My husbands pretty good at keeping his head cool, especially when the kids are around. Now had he not apologized that would have been different, besides my mans a pretty big guy, it's not usual that people intentionally offend him or me. But it's OK the guy most definitely felt like an ass when all was said and done, maybe next time be will thing twice before he uses that old lame ass bull shit again. I can handle my own!!!
 
Posted by myluvsbetter on Thursday, March 09, 2006 - 5:17 AM
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penzi

 
beautiful. . . well put! true, true and true..
love the sex in the city reference.
can not love someone else till
you love yourself.



 
Posted by penzi on Wednesday, March 08, 2006 - 4:06 PM
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Tony Blogtana
Tony Blogtana

 

And you've gotta love yourself enough, to be with somebody that'll love you the right way.


 
Posted by Tony Blogtana on Thursday, March 09, 2006 - 4:16 AM
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Sharona

 
damn...this blog kicked my ass to the curb! i just found out my 'nice guy' boyfriend is a coke addict. with hella encouragement, advice, and support from my friends it finally got through my thick head that no matter how much i love him and how much he loves me, i cant help him or change him, so i have to walk away. it hurts like a biznotch and i feel like an ass for not picking up on his habit sooner. but you live and you learn right? anyway, sorry for the mini-rant here. thanx for posting this epic blog brah!  
 
Posted by Sharona on Wednesday, March 08, 2006 - 6:04 PM
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Tony Blogtana
Tony Blogtana

 
My cousin once told me that you can't have your stuff together & be messing with somebody that's fucked up....   b-cuz they'll fuck you up too, when it's all said & done.
 
Posted by Tony Blogtana on Thursday, March 09, 2006 - 4:13 AM
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anthony
anthony sherrod

 
i you hit a home run on this one i agree with you  but you know some women are going to be hating on you so look out
 
Posted by anthony on Thursday, March 09, 2006 - 3:50 AM
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Tony Blogtana
Tony Blogtana

 
 I'm not worried about em' hatin' on me....   I'm used to that shit.  The only way that somebody's gonnabe able to stop me from expressing my opinion, is to kill me.
 
Posted by Tony Blogtana on Thursday, March 09, 2006 - 4:11 AM
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