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shanna moakler



Dernière mise à jour : 6/02/2010

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Sexe : Female
Statut : Célibataire
Age : 34
Zodiaque: Bélier

Ville : LA
Région : California
Pays: US
Date d’inscription :: 5/11/2005
lundi, juillet 21, 2008 

Humeur actuelle :constipated
Dear diary,
Oh em gee...what a day! I had my last session of lipo-desolve in Vegas. Cracked out on adderall and perks; I just needed to head back home. I was about to jump on my helicopter that I rightfully won in my latest divorce, when the Maloof brothers gave me their lear jet. Yes, honeys. Gave me. Suck it. Anyway, I call up my best star fucking whore of a best friend Chrissie Carnell (who's done surprisingly well in this town without a publicist...she must be a Scientologist) and go to Carmen and Rob's party in the Bu. Worried that I might not get that crotch shot I put in my "the secret" dream book (damnit, when is it MY TURN???)...I paid the photogs extra to hide in the trees. Then all of the sudden there is a commotion outside. The photogs I paid for just got into a slapping fight with Kim K's bought paparazzi. Kim wanted to make sure that she got that double wide shot, but I had to upstage that double wide girl. So here it is America.......Never in my wildest dreams would I ever feel sorry for, um, Ms. Hilton but I do, because she was taken advantage of by a simple closet organizer who has no modeling skill, hosting ability, acting talent....but there was that poorly distributed sex tape....damn, could never get Travis drunk enough...ahem...neither could Kim....Anyway, my mama always said, "where there's a will there is a way..."

OH MY GAWD......I gotta go. Perez just called me. He just found my kids at the Vegas airport. I, like, totally forgot I had them....There were no paparazzi around to remind me. Sheesh.....Life is so hard.

Sparkles and Balls,
Shannaxoxoxox
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Travis Barkers Biggest Fan
Familia Reyes

 
Perks musta been pretty amazing..
 
Publié par Travis Barkers Biggest Fan le lundi, juillet 21, 2008 - 6:19
[Répondre
*Julie*
Julie Cockrum

 
....and the best part....sparkles and balls! Omfg! Lol!
 
Publié par *Julie* le lundi, juillet 21, 2008 - 6:19
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Jen
Jennifer Murphy

 
Ahhhh....I want your life.... hehehehehe.

 
Publié par Jen le lundi, juillet 21, 2008 - 6:22
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*mizz dmc* [me+you]

 
LOL nice!
 
Publié par *mizz dmc* [me+you] le lundi, juillet 21, 2008 - 6:22
[Répondre
Shanna Love

 
you need to write a book and title it, "My Life According to You". seriously...lol... you would sell millions.
You are a very funny, well-spoken girl :)
 
Publié par Shanna Love le lundi, juillet 21, 2008 - 6:22
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Aaarrrgggg ☠
Lauren Vento

 
haha... I love that you have a sense of humor.. thanks for the laugh.

 
Publié par Aaarrrgggg ☠ le lundi, juillet 21, 2008 - 9:43
[Répondre
+MariSol +
Marisol No Last

 
i'm serioulsy LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Good shit Ms.
S


xoxo
Mari
 
Publié par +MariSol + le lundi, juillet 21, 2008 - 9:54
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~Niki~

 
F*cking hilarious!! Love it!! :)
 
Publié par ~Niki~ le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 1:05
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♫ Mrs. Carter!! ♫
Lucinda Carter

 
love!
 
Publié par ♫ Mrs. Carter!! ♫ le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 1:05
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♥☠♥ JESSICA ♥☠♥

 
lol you crack me up. I read what Perez wrote and...PLEASE.... how bias was that story! Anyways, it sounds like you had a fun weekend...I'm jealous!

xoxoxo Jessica xoxoxo
 
Publié par ♥☠♥ JESSICA ♥☠♥ le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 2:29
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~*Nickie*~

 
heh..thats pretty funny.
LOL sparkles n balls! your the best babe!
<3 nik
 
Publié par ~*Nickie*~ le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 2:29
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...cheryl & pedro...
Pedro Kol

 
HAHA!! Rock on girl
 
Publié par ...cheryl & pedro... le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 2:30
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♡Perfectly Flawed♡
Tiffany Dawson

 
<3 it girly

TEAM SHANNA
 
Publié par ♡Perfectly Flawed♡ le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 2:31
[Répondre
Lindsey Lou Who ♥

 
I don't know how you guys can deal with papparazzi. I really feel for celebrities.
I know I couldn't do it! More power to you!
 
Publié par Lindsey Lou Who ♥ le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 2:32
[Répondre
Kirin

 
Good for you Shanna! Too funny!

Warmly,

Kirin :)
 
Publié par Kirin le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 2:42
[Répondre
Salley O'Malley

 
Hahahahahahahha, made me spit out my Yoo-Hoo.....Seriously, you need your own sitcom or something. Actually, I see you in a American verson of Absolutely Fabulous, quick call Roseanne she owns the rights.....

Sparkles, but no balls...well except on Fridays
Salley
 
Publié par Salley O'Malley le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 2:42
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Danielle☆
Danielle Wingo

 
u rock ass shanna...i love that u arent afraid to poke fun at the gossip surrounding you...fuck perez, he's such a douche!
 
Publié par Danielle☆ le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 2:53
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Ashley
Ashley McDonald

 
aha, simply amazin!! go shay nay!!!
 
Publié par Ashley le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 3:01
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Meghan

 
Love it!! Wicked pissa.
=_
 
Publié par Meghan le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 3:09
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Jamie
jamie lynn daniel

 
When I grow up I want to be just like you!.....No seriously..I do.
You rock hard girl!
 
Publié par Jamie le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 3:10
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Lisa Marie
Lisa Lamb

 
LOL love it!

xoxo
 
Publié par Lisa Marie le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 3:10
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☆♥@JAZANTI♥☆

 
HA,HA,HA LOVE IT!
 
Publié par ☆♥@JAZANTI♥☆ le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 3:18
[Répondre


 
You ROCK, Shanna!

Like someone else said, you NEED to have your own reality show! I miss seeing you on TV~ especially just being yourself. I have always admired, adored, and loved you so much, girl~ and I can also relate to you in so many ways (I was in beauty pageants, too- won the state title of Miss American Coed- placed in the top 5 of the Teen USA pageant for my state, have aspired to be a playmate but would now settle for Hot Housewives or something....and now I have 7 kids~ yes, *7*!!!).


Anyway, sorry for rambling about all that "stuff"~ you totally crack me up! I KNOW you are a great person...and a SUPER Mom, too! I, just like the others, have no idea how you deal with all of the media attention- especially when it's false.
However, you handle it all with such grace, poise, and humor that I know we (as your fans!) don't have to worry about you! ;)

Keep writing your hysterical blogs...and keep being YOU!

Sparkles and Balls and hugs & kisses!!!! XOXOXO
 
Publié par le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 3:20
[Répondre
Kara

 
You're the best darling!! xoxo
 
Publié par Kara le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 3:20
[Répondre
♥ Mr & Mrs Trujillo ♥

 
LMAO, you are too funny! Rock what you got mama!! I need to write a story like this.

 
Publié par ♥ Mr & Mrs Trujillo ♥ le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 4:18
[Répondre
@_aly

 
LOVES IT! LOVE YOU! STAY BEAUTIFUL! XO
 
Publié par @_aly le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 4:19
[Répondre
MaTriX

 
miss M,

Cant wait for the Crotch Shot,!! have you ever tried Vodka with Melon Slices?.. my new all time favorite.


Things here in Dallas are FAR more laid back, but we Do have Jessica Simpson YEE HAW..

sTAY cLAsSY Miss Thang

Mr Radtastic
 
Publié par MaTriX le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 4:20
[Répondre
april

 
Jesus that is some seriously funny sh*t.... Aww the life of a wannabee.. soo sad..
 
Publié par april le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 8:04
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Muerta's Las Trepas
Muerta's Las Trepas

 
Those GIRLS can't hold a candle to you! What TALENT do either of them really have besides spending their fathers' money? PLEASE!!! You can do it all and you don't have to resort to cheap attention seeking behavior to get noticed!

As for sex tapes, did anyone really WANT to see Paris naked, let alone having sex? NOT ME! Gross! I'd lay odds you and Travis could make some big bucks if you went that route, though. Be most watched even compared to Pam and Tommy! Not that you would, but still...

You have my great respect!
 
Publié par Muerta's Las Trepas le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 8:04
[Répondre
Jessica/tmje
Jessica Stowers

 
lol ha ha that's was cool and funny
 
Publié par Jessica/tmje le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 8:04
[Répondre
Jessica
Jessica Miller

 
Mama, i just read what Perez Hilton wrote on his Website. That website is such shit. I could not believe what nasty comments people were saying about you. It makes me SO MAD when people start cutting you up and insulting you, especially about your mothering skills. OMG who ever said moms can't go out and have a good time and party a little bit. It's like they want you to be licked in your house and never come out. Don't worry about what ANYONE is saying about you, you are beautiful and talented and unlike a lot of these bitches you have a sense of humor.
Kepp living your life the way you see fit and pay no attention to haters
 
Publié par Jessica le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 8:04
[Répondre
Krissy

 
omg no you didnt...I am laughing so hard.. you are brilliant!!! you seriously crack me up. Love ya mama!! your the best.
xoxo
((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))
you are so much better then those tarts.

p.s perez is gross, he looks like a jelly donut thats about to explode. and he prob smells too, ew.
heeheehe

TEAM SHANNA!!!!! (wink-wink)
 
Publié par Krissy le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 8:07
[Répondre
♥ CrAzY/BeAuTiFuL♥
Rachel Alcina

 
THAT is some funny shit:)
 
Publié par ♥ CrAzY/BeAuTiFuL♥ le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 8:07
[Répondre
Cassandra

 
You are so funny, I too, like lots of others wish you would have your own reality show -- probably in the works and you are just holding back the little surprise to all of your fans!! Rock on pretty lady!
 
Publié par Cassandra le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 8:07
[Répondre
Kylie

 
I sense a little sarcasm here haha. FUCK Perez! He wants to rag on you but what is he famous for? Ohhhh that's right drawing penises on celebrities' faces and starting misguided rumors.

Just keep doing what you do Shanna!!
 
Publié par Kylie le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 8:07
[Répondre
victor&melissa
Melissa Day Smith

 
she needs a double wide shot! I am so deleting her ass!LOL Why do nearly all of the beautiful people need to be so phony! Maybe b/c 60% of them are.

 
Publié par victor&melissa le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 8:08
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Buzz Drive

 
Pissing my pants laughing...you rock mama!!!
 
Publié par Buzz Drive le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 8:09
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Mina

 
GREAT... :))
 
Publié par Mina le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 8:10
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♥~Barajas~♥

 
You are the BEST ever, Like I've said many times you are real! You are as real as any woman who deals with men, has kids and still works.......Life would be so boring if wealth was instant, which is the reason for their attention deprivation
 
Publié par ♥~Barajas~♥ le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 10:56
[Répondre
Vanessa

 
LOL amen to that!
 
Publié par Vanessa le mardi, juillet 22, 2008 - 11:59
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♥ANGEL BABYY♥
Angel Fletcher

 
this cant be real she seems better that that
 
Publié par ♥ANGEL BABYY♥ le mercredi, juillet 23, 2008 - 1:54
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The Fan Girl Next Door

 
God, you are such a funny smart ass. I LOVE it! That is the only way to get through shit, if you ask me.


Janet :)
 
Publié par The Fan Girl Next Door le jeudi, juillet 24, 2008 - 1:12
[Répondre
~Patricia Nikole~

 
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! BALLZ....
 
Publié par ~Patricia Nikole~ le jeudi, juillet 24, 2008 - 1:13
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Sara
Sara Beaulieu

 
I love it!!!! I want some perks, betta yet an OC 80 will do!
 
Publié par Sara le jeudi, juillet 24, 2008 - 1:14
[Répondre
Michael,writer for EntertainmentVine.com

 
not bad,Shanna....


now if you could have given the Maloof brothers a basketball team for the jet.....
 
Publié par Michael,writer for EntertainmentVine.com le jeudi, juillet 24, 2008 - 1:17
[Répondre
Sweetie Kai Designs

 
BBBWAAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
 
Publié par Sweetie Kai Designs le jeudi, juillet 24, 2008 - 1:35
[Répondre
FoxyBox™ a.k.a Boots

 
I dunno how the fuck I landed on this page - but this is the funniest shit!!!!!!!!!

*Foxsaay*
 
Publié par FoxyBox™ a.k.a Boots le jeudi, juillet 24, 2008 - 1:40
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ace di cuori

 
this. is.
Amazing!
 
Publié par ace di cuori le jeudi, juillet 24, 2008 - 2:39
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♥Mz. Mora♥
L. Bradford

 
Hahahah I love it!!! You have such a great sense of humour!!
 
Publié par ♥Mz. Mora♥ le jeudi, juillet 24, 2008 - 12:29
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Jennifer loves the chubby boys...

 
You are too freaking funny!
 
Publié par Jennifer loves the chubby boys... le jeudi, juillet 24, 2008 - 12:29
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