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They say things go round in circles...
I've always shunned the idea that the world operates in a cyclic fashion... As far as I was concerned, things happen in a particular order. This order is not specifically structured or predetermined, it can just be a sequence of unpredictable events.
YearDot has finished, University has finished, certain relationships have finished... but yet I'm sat writing this at 01:48am and I'm realising things have gone round in a full circle – although that's not to say things haven't progressed, rather, certain things that had previously departed my everyday existence are seemingly returning.
Some are good, some are... well... not good.
For those of you that watched my previous videos on the YD site, you may remember a video of my old flat that my girlfriend & I shared. It was a film of me sat on a deck chair due to a lack of sofa complaining about the lack of heat within the property.
A year later, I'm sat on a futon due to the lack of sofa wearing four jumpers and three pairs of trousers as a result of my boiler deciding it would stop working. As I have a cheeky glance at the thermostat on the wall it's flashing '6 degrees' at me... It doesn't usually flash, but it's hinting a sense of urgency as if to say - “fix me... or you will die”. It's a reassuringly similar image to that of last year; it encourages an enormous feeling of recollection and reminiscence but it's somewhat thwarted by the fact my body temperature is dropping at a truly frightening rate.
I also find myself back in Kingston. I moved away from here after I finished University and went back to Portsmouth. It's great to be back here... but it's quite odd. If my life were a story, chapter one would have been in Portsmouth – 'the early years', and chapter two would be in Kingston – 'the Uni years' and now chapter three seems to be in the same location. It's the same location, but some of the main characters have changed. Furthermore – there is no name for this chapter... 'the (just after Uni) years'... My girlfriend & I are no longer together, the people I went to University with have moved on / away, I'm no longer in education, I have to pay Council Tax... I'm now a grown-up... oh sh*t.
My days are filled with hopping from one coffee shop to another... I feel like a character from 'Friends' but less successful, poorer and a great deal colder. Whilst subconsciously slipping into a caffeine induced coma each day, I find myself mixing with the middle-class folk of Surrey... The same question will inevitably be thrown towards me in a patronising manor... “So, what do you do for a living”?
Um...
“Well, I've just finished Uni, and I'm a comic writer... well... no, I'm an actor... In fact no, I'm a stand-up comedian”.
I've settled with the latter. “I'm a stand-up comedian”. It's a great thing to say. During the filming of YearDot I never 'confessed' to people I was a comic. On a personal level, I felt I didn't deserve such a bold title. Back then, it was a hobby, an interest... something that I enjoyed doing and flirted with the prospects it could potentially bring. It's different now... the glamour has disappeared (8 hours on a train to north Wales for a 15 minute gig). The glamour has disappeared, yet it seems so much better than a year ago. I can't really explain how... It just all seems to be moving in the right direction. I'm going into each job/gig with a greater sense of expectation, but that, juxtaposed with a maturity for the moment appears to be working.
I'm gigging, on average around 15 times a month. It's getting there. Ideally, I want to double that. I've looked over some YearDot videos tonight and watched a video where I'm gigging about 3 or 4 times a month. It's a nice feeling to see things have picked up. Hopefully I can read this blog a year from now having reached the goal of gigging every night... Who knows?
So, although I've said things have disappeared from my life, I suppose comedy has remained a constant. It's still the one thing I'm determined to keep doing, and eventually succeed in. I realise that during the filming of YearDot, both the hours I put into comedy and indeed the filming of the show massively jeopardised the relationship I had with my girlfriend. We separated in the summer, but all is cool between us. She's a wicked girl and only now can I realise how much she supported my career and helped me. She also guided me through a dark period of my life where I became dangerously addicted to Pesto. It may seem pointless me saying this in a supposedly 'comic' blog – but here are some lessons to learn here kids:
1.Even if you're properly passionate about something, don't forget what's truly important and spacial to you.
2. If things aren't going well... (job / relationship / whatever...) - don't worry! Things will always pick up – ALWAYS!
3.You can balance things – don't give all your focus to one thing! Share it out!
4.Don't trust plumbers! If they say your boiler has been fixed, make them prove it before they leave your property.
I can tell I've matured. Even from reading this, I've realised that instead of writing my previously amusing thoughts... my blogs now resemble some form of scripted Jeremy Kyle...
I also realised that I'd grown up this morning... I looked out of my window and it was snowing. Rather than to scream and run outside like a small, redbull filled child, my first thought was... 'the traffic will be a nightmare'... Oh shi*t.
Right, this blog has gone off the point slightly... I'll sum up in bullet points...
-I'm now a full time stand-up comicI'm living in Kingston
-Writing more material than ever
-I'm totally in love with Pixie Lott
-I'm cold
-I don't like sweetcorn / tomatoes / plumbers
-I use Twitter (@simonjenkins09)
-I'm very very happy
I honestly don't know how many people on the internet know me, or how many of you read these, or how many of you actually watched YearDot... Even if it's one old man sat in his shed watching VHS repeats of the show... thank you. Thank you so much to everyone that has messaged me / watched me etc... It generally does mean a great deal to me. It's a lovely feeling and I hope you continue to contact. I massive hope you're all well & have a great Christmas.
Make the most of every day and every chance you get. Never think you're 'bigger' than something. I've made the mistake of turning things down due to egotistical reasons. It's a huge mistake and I've learnt from it. Seize each chance that comes your way, whether it's big or small. If you do all these things... then hopefully you'll avoid being an unfit 21 year old boy, unable to grow facial hair, that's severely hungry, sat in a cold flat wondering if he will ever marry Pixie Lott...
Thanks – take it easy. Si xx
1:16 PM
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