How can someones words just rip right through you and hurt os much
i think that words make deeper wounds than a knife might
it's halloween
i am Burt Reynolds
and I am drinking alone
I want to talk to someone
i want to feel loved and excepted
cause i keep getting blows left and right to my self worth
it takes alot for me to be your friend
it takes alot for me to open up
to be honest
and everytime I have someone rip my heart out step on it and put it back
am i really a bad person?
I feel as though I show God's love and light
but do i really?
I want to feel excepted
feel like i am good enough like i am
i believe God feels that way and i want to believe i feel that way but no one else is letting me know that
i can't stand when you write or call someone (esspecially when you pour your heart out) and they never write or call back
i am crumbling
i have everyday been drawing myself closer to God
I have gone a month (on my own) without looking at porn
i read my bible everyday
i am doing a study on Finances and on how to be a Godly man
i pray constantly
and I love and are there for everyone i know
but yet I am percieved to be un-Godly and a hypocrite
un worthy of being with someone
unfit to write or call
and such
With every good thing that happens in my life i have 5 bad things
i mean i have a home now, a car, and an ipod
BUT
i have no friends, no money, no woman, everyone seems to either hate me or blow smoke up my ass and i hate my life
where can i go?
what can i do?
I HATE THIS
UGH
i was also told tonight that "i love being sad"
i would like to go on record saying "no, i do not like being sad"
i just have bad luck
and this time it's happened all at once
ok well now i know i can't sleep
and the people i trust and wanna call are all sleeping and most have moved on with their lives
I guess this will all make for good songs
ha
i guess i am done
matthew