My friend Marc and I saw this
completely bitchin’ movie but I wasn’t really in the mood for partying this year. I won’t get into it, but my St. Patrick’s Day sucked.
The cool thing about alcoholism is that you don’t have to wait for a specific day. You can practice it all year long.
To that end, I’d like to present:
Erin’s 5 Most Memorable DrunksPlease read the following with a twist of lime and a grain of salt. The majority of these incidents occurred years ago and grandma has since laid off the sauce. She’s more likely to be found eating a peanut butter cookie and watching DVR on any given Friday than she is partying it up.
5What I Drank: 7 shots of tequila
Where I Was: High school boyfriend’s best friend’s parent’s basement
How I Woke Up: In bed, on a Bert & Ernie pillowcase covered in spaghetti vomit.
4What I Drank: Purple drinks with a glow stick in them
Where I Was: Visiting a friend in Chicago
How I Woke Up: In a sleeping bag, wearing one shoe and soaking wet from an unknown substance.
3What I Drank: Various
Where I Was: Various
How I Woke Up: To a guy who greeted me with "Good morning, Emily!" and was completely nude except for his socks.
2What I Drank: Beer from a keg
Where I Was: College
How I Woke Up: For some reason I had opened up 2 large bags of Lay’s potato chips and a 12 pack of chocolate frosted Pop Tarts and thrown the contents all over my friend’s dorm room floor. I have no recollection of the event, though my friends tell me I kept saying "This is how you party!" over and over.
1What I Drank: Budweiser
Where I Was: Welcome to the JohnsonsHow I Woke Up: Partially naked on a bare mattress with my best friend and a Prada model named Giovanni who kept trying to put his finger up my butt.