No, really... they're not. But we'll get to that in a minute. As I approach another birthday (okay, its still several months off but I tend to get retrospective fairly early on), it occurs to me that there should be some words of wisdom that women pass down to each other... generation to generation, so that the women after us are armed with what they need to get the most from life. I listed all the important lessons I've learned over the years and then narrowed it down to five so that even those with a short attention span could make it through the list.
So, let's kick it off - my top five things women should know - starting with the first "must-know" that earned the title spot for this little ditty:
Those fingers aren't just for typing. It's time that women learned that its okay to be sexual. Not slutty. Not reckless or careless. But gloriously, beautifully sexual. And yes, there is a difference. Enjoying sex doesn't mean you're any less of a lady... it just makes you more of a woman. Now, only when the time is right of course, but maturity levels and emotional issues aside, you need to grant yourself permission to explore, engage and enjoy. Think you don't look your best while in the throws of passion? Trust me - he hasn't noticed and probably doesn't care. He's more excited that you're excited which is the whole reason for being there in the first place. After all, you can't really expect your guy to know how to please you if you don't know how to please yourself and contrary to popular opinion, there is no secret manual out there that provides instruction. Its something you have to figure out for yourself. And that my dears, is what those fingers are for.
"Sexy" is a state of mind, not an article of clothing. It's the way you smile, the way you walk, the way you pick your nose or whatever it is you happen to be doing at the time. Being sexy isn't a short skirt or the CFM pumps - its all in the way you carry yourself and in the way you project. Granted, the flannel gown isn't the most alluring of items but I've had quite a few friends that looked "sexy" no matter what they wore - sweats, jeans or yes, even that flannel gown. If you believe you're sexy, the rest of the world will too, short skirt or not.
The "F" word. Why do you need to know the F word? Because its just so damn versatile, that's why. It can be used as an exclamation, in exasperation, surprise or fear... as an adjective, an adverb.. you get the idea. The list just goes on and on. It makes a point without being tacky and gives you full expression without sounding like a sailor. It is, I have to say, one of the best communication tools we have.
The sun does not revolve around your man. If it did, we'd all be worshipping him too. Now, don't get me wrong. Love is great. Love is grand. But that doesn't mean you give up everything that he loved about you in the process. It's okay to have different interests. Its okay to have different friends. And whether you realize it or not, that clingy shit will drive him away faster than you can pick out a china pattern so kick the habit while there's still time. Never, EVER sell yourself short because you think it will please a guy. He'll lose interest and you'll lose your self-respect. He doesn't expect you to become a female verison of him and he doesn't expect you to forego all the things you love so that you can be at his beck and call. He hooked up with you because he liked who you were then, not who he thought he might could encourage you to become. That's something we do... not guys.
Relax. Life isn't always fair. Maybe you don't have the perfect job or the perfect car but the reality is, those things don't exist. Life just is what it is. It's beautiful, painful, joyful and sad. You're going to have really high highs and really low lows too. The object of the game is to push through and get the most from everything that comes your way. Take it in and then let it all right back out. All those things that you think are the end of your world
aren't. They're just little pieces to your great big puzzle. And while you may not always think so, you're going to be fine. You just need to relax and everything you need will ultimately come your way.
So, there you have it... the top five things I think all women should know. Any additions to the list?
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