Hey everyone out there. This is Johnny Sexdrive with the latest dirt on the Dirty T's. I must say that this weekend was one of the best times I have had in a long while. Let me take a breath......
The whole weekend extravaganza kicked off on Friday night with the arrival of Miki, my long awaited brother from another mother coming to Tokyo to get it on and celebrate his last run with the bulls before the official tying of the knot ceremony next month back in the States. Hope he enjoys them greener pastures.
Friday night was a sultry and dark affair. The Dirty T's were booked to play an amazing outdoor venue in Minakami, Gunma the next day, so the rain was making me a little anxious. Upon consulting Tommy T Bone (Tomo) about this problem, he quickly suggested that we needed a Japanese teru-teru bozu, otherwise known as a "get rid of the rain charm". Without missing a beat, our always super sexy and, oh so juicy Eri-chan the bartender, made us one out of tissue paper and rubber bands. She said to hang it outside and let it rock out. So I did.....as you do....with Eri.
Friday evening ended up with the basic east side bar-hop.Dave was funnier than ever. It was so great hanging out with Miki and talking about new and old times. That is, until I wanted to kill him the next morning for keeping me out too late..
Saturday morning arrived much earlier than planned. We had a big day ahead of us. I needed black black coffee before heading out. The morning felt a lot like the end of Good Fellas.... We had to pick up a van, my equipment, Wotlie's equipment, pick up Tomo and pick up a rental bass amp and some drum stands from the studio. All before getting on the highway for the three hour drive to Gunma.
Wotlie took the wheel for the first leg of the journey. I had never driven with him, so I felt it was my mission to drive from the passenger seat. This kinda pissed Wotlie off. But after I learned that....well......Wotlie is as blind as a bat, I didn't feel so bad.
About an hour into the road trip something amazing happened. The clouds separated and beautiful sunshine dropped right in on us. The sun stayed with us the entire trip. Thank you Mr. Teru-teru bozu. Eri-chan....as usual, you totally ROCK!!
We arrived at "Canyons" at about 3:30 pm. It was one of the most beautiful drives I have taken in years.
Anyway, Canyons is a very cool place to be. They have a huge outdoor deck, great bar, multiple places to BBQ by the river and the friendliest staff you'll ever meet. Oh yeah... they operate all kinds of adventure tours from white-water rafting to Canyoning. Getcha some....
Soon after our arrival, we quickly got some beers and set up for the evening show. The atmosphere was so relaxed and laid back, we thought our sound check might trip the town's alarms. But to my surprise, we were actually encouraged to play a loud as we liked. Wotlie kept saying " Don't worry man. This ain't the Hilton". So I chilled out and brought out the thunder sticks. Thanks 12.5%

This was all great, but we soon ran into a problem. We were finished setting up at 4:30 pm. By then, we had had a few beers. We weren't scheduled to start the first set until 8pm. If you don't know much about the Dirty T's, know this. If we ain't playing music, we drinking. And five hours of drinking makes Johnny a very drunk drummer. And not to mention Wotlie and "out-of-the-spaceship" Tommy T.
To solve the problem, we opted for some hot coffee and a walk by the river. It worked great. We stayed off the beer and made it until show time relatively sober. I was impressed with us.
We opened the first set timidly. The crowd was spread out here and there. Everyone was either having a BBQ by the river or chilling out around the lodge. After we got into the set, the vibe came together to groove and got dirtier and dirtier. By the end of the first set, the whole place was dancing and it felt great to be behind MY old drum kit for the first time in years. See, in Tokyo, the bars and clubs have a house drum kit, so I usually just bring my sticks. Playing old trusty "little red" felt amazing.
As usual, we took a nice sized break before our wardrobe change and make-up session for the Dirty T set. When we walked out to play the second set in our hot rod jumpsuits, the crowd weren't sure how to take us. That's right. We were there to launch an all out dirty attack. And that's just what we did. We played hard loud and proud. Since "Canyons" is in the middle of the mountains, my drums echoed heavily in the distance. Wotlie's gut wrenching vocals could be heard well after that last note. T-bone was actually in the spaceship for the entire set with the kick-ass Hartke rental amp. Our original tunes went over very well. Wotlie and Tommy T got frisky and even kicked my cymbals.We got everybody in the house saying " hell yeah" from the hug to the tree. For me, it was one of the best shows yet.
Unlike Tokyo, when we finished playing, we just hung out on the deck with all the cool friends we had made since our arrival. At this point, we ran into a group of rather interesting characters. But basically we started to hang with Bo and his mates, Glenn, Carlos, and some guy who can't remember my name either. One thing led to another beer and we were soon invited to check out Bo's newly purchased lodge just up the road.
We jumped in the bus and headed up the hill to another huge lodge. When we got there, we soon learned that there were no guests except for Bo's friends, so then the party really started. Dave was all over the place and very friendly to everyone. There was food, drink and even James Bond was shown on the giant projector. Wotlie gets a kick outta old Bond flicks. Must be a British thing. But I let it slide.
So, we're sitting, getting our snack and our drink on, then all of the sudden, Bo decides we need to play a round of golf at the train station. After much persuasion, Wotlie and I agree to tag along. By this time, Tomo T-bone the "bass ninja" had had enough, and walked back to Canyons.
After a short and very daring bus ride to the station, we found ourselves in a very surreal situation. We walked past some sleeping dudes, then through pitch a black tunnel, finally to reach the longest flight of stairs I have ever seen. As far as you could see, there were stairs in a huge tunnel leading down to who knows where.
Our host decides it's the perfect time to break out the golf clubs, and golf mat, for a little driving practice. This is a tunnel, right? So, the ball ricochets everywhere, and at high speed. In this particular type of golf, bottle rockets are used to distract the players from either hitting the ball or distract them from avoiding being hit by a deadly golf ball.
By this time, Wotlie and I are totally freaked out and ready to head home to crash. But of course our hosts insist that we have to retrieve the balls from the bottom. If you could have seen those stairs, most sane people would never have gone down, even though this portion of the tunnel was well lit. I mean it looked far.
I knew that we were going to have to ride out the madness in order to get home, so I convinced Wotlie to give in and let go. After climbing down around 500 stairs we came to a train platform in the bottom of a fricken mountain. Absolutely no one around. Bo suddenly remembers that he had left the bottle rockets at the top of the stairs, and without hesitation, climbed his ass all the way to the top to get them.
Meanwhile, the other players continued with the golf game. But this time, it's hitting the balls up the stairs. Now, most of us have probably never hit a golf ball full force at steps. Let me just tell you, it's as stupid as it sounds. The balls ricochet at twice the velocity as the swing. Now we were down in train tunnels with very little place to hide. As this goes on, in the faint distance, I heard Bo shooting bottle rockets back down the tunnel in our direction. The strangest thing was, the blasts were so far away, it really brought to attention how far underground we really were. Creepy.
After the bottle rockets made it back down, it was game on. Wotlie and I were totally into it all by now, except I wasn't into hitting the balls into the stairs. I actually spent my time lighting rockets and cleaning up the rockets I had shot. I'm a non-trace party animal.
We shot all the rockets and realized that there were no more trains coming. This meant it was time to climb back up the 500 stairs and make it to the bus, which by my amazement, we were able to do. Bo kept saying that we were really going to enjoy the ski jump, but Wotlie and I graciously asked if we could be dropped back at Canyons. We made it back at the crack of dawn in one piece. Thankfully not arrested.
Morning creapt up on us and we rolled out of our rooms at 9:30 am. Just in time to miss the hotel breakfast. I was really looking forward to that breakfast, too. We had to go out in the van and get something to eat. Minakami is a very small town with few shops. But one thing you can always count on in Japan is a ramen noodle shop. That's right....a ramen breakfast.
We made it back to the lodge to chill before our appointment for "Canyoning", which seems to be a sport. And that's exactly what we needed, sports after train station golf.
Canyoning at first glance is grown-ups playing in the creek. But much much more involved.
Basically, you put on wet suit booties, 2 thick wet suits, wet suit gloves, a helmet,a life jacket and a repelling harness.
The look is where it's at. Wotlie looked like a gay Buzz Light year. Tomo looked like a mini-power ranger. And I basically looked like a buoy. And one of the best things we noticed is that the girls on the tour were rockin full make up. Make up and sports. Ya gotta love it.

The guide walked with us through the stream. Sometimes the water was deep enough to float. Basically, you are to float between rocks and sometimes the current will push you through with a little power. The canyon gets steeper and the little waterfalls lead to bigger ones. I think the first big one took the whole group by surprise. In our group, the people looked nervous, so Wotlie, Tomo and I went first.
There you are atop a huge waterfall. The guide straps a rope to your harness and lowers you down the waterfall. At mid-point, the guide lets the rope go and you slide over the rock face and splash into a deep pool of water under the fall. Pretty cool.
You then wind your way through more small rapids until you get to the next big one. This one was my favorite. At this waterfall you had some choices of how to go down. Face first, feet first, backwards head first, or you could just jump in. I enjoyed jumping in. It was about 5 meters tall with a very very deep pool at the bottom. But unlike the first one, it had a giant rock face on the opposite side.When you land under the current of a 5 meter waterfall you are pushed under with a lot of force. You have to put your hands in front of you, or you can smash your face very easily. No one go hurt and it was a nice wild ride.
The last major waterfall was also good fun. Everyone was loosened up and the drop wasn't so tall. We tried flips and Wotlie and I even monkey swung Tomo off the ledge.Good times.
There was only one moment that I felt my life was in danger. That's when I was counter-attacked by Wotlie and Tomo in about 1 meter of water. I nearly drown. Bastards!
The trip back to Tokyo was also good fun. Tommy T agreed to drive which meant Wotlie and I could get our red wine on. Ham, cheese, and crackers with red wine and a killer sunset. We all had such a bromance. Again, the scenery was amazing. I passed out before it got dark.
All and all a truly memorable weekend. Thanks to all those involved. We had a great time out in the country. Heeeee
The Dirty T's are booked to play Canyons again on September 12th.
There is talk of a great package deal for Tokyo Dirty T fans.
Round trip bus from Tokyo
bed for the night
Dinner and breakfast
All-you-can-drink beer in the evening
Dirty T's concert
Canyoning tour
Total price 13,500 per person.

Let us know if your are interested.

Cheers peers!!

Johnny Sexdrive