These events actually happened after going out for dinner tonight. My family and I went out to dinner at the Macaroni Grill and my mom had a few drinks so you know how that goes. So i'm writing this blog for some entertainment, and keep in mind these actually happend.

You know you're drunk when...you almost trip over the curb walking out to the car.

You know you're drunk when...your son mentions DUB rims and the other son says, "Do you even know what DUB rims are?" and he replies "Yea, 20 inch rims." and as you're getting out of the car you say "Good for 20 inch rims." and when you're kids harrang you about it, you don't remember saying that.

You know you're drunk when...you try to flip off your son for making a comment about your drunkeness but can't close your fist and leave your middle finger up because you're so drunk that your motor skills are failing.

You know you're drunk when...you're listen to your favorite country singer on the car radio and say, "What is this crap?" and your kids reply, "We've been saying that for years!"

You know you're drunk when...your husband tries to scare you by slamming on the breaks and your jumping reaction is delayed by 2 seconds because you're so drunk that your motor skills are failing.

You know you're drunk when...you start slurring your words together and they sound like you're speaking another language.

You know you're drunk when...as soon as you walk in the door to your house, you  pass out on the couch.

You know you're drunk when...your family comes running into the living room with a huge flashlight yelling, "FIRE!!" and you nearly shit your pants, but have no idea what's going on.

You know you're drunk when...you wake up the next morning and have your family making fun of you because you were drunk last night, but you don't remember a damn thing!

If any of these things have happened to you, I only have one thing to say to you...YOU WERE DRUNK AS A MONKEY!! :D