As the co-perpetrator (and wearer) of the most extreme pointed-toe production shoes in the world (with the slenderest of stiletto heels) - RoSa Shoes - I am, amongst other things, paying tribute to that icon, that VeeDub (VW), of the fashion world. Her shoes are of course known for their excessive elevation rather than their elongation, but I have long been an admirer not only of her splendid designs, but her whole fashion philosophy and intellectualisation of clothes-wearing.
I subscribe to her view that the clothes people wear are not simply an expression of their identity, but actually contribute to the quality of their lives: "you have a much better life if you wear impressive clothes". I join her in her abhorrence of anything mediocre or conformist, and in her love for the eccentric: "Eccentricity is such a badge of honour to be given in these conformist times". I agree (rather I FEEL) that clothes not only define one's sexuality but also empower one: "I've never thought it powerful to be like a second-rate man. Femininity is stronger, and I don't understand why people keep plugging this boring asexual body".
Yes, my RoSa shoes ARE impressive, they ARE verging on the eccentric and they ARE damn sexy. Furthermore, in keeping with VeeDub's thinking that unless you have to work at wearing something, it's not worth wearing, one does have to employ the (preferably sober) mind as well as the body in order to wear them.
One does have to be careful not to catch the long toes when going upstairs, for example. But it's easy enough to turn one's feet slightly sideways (looks kind of elegant, too). Another danger point is when sitting on a bar stool with legs crossed - one has to be careful not to ensnare the end of one's elongated toe in men's private parts. Mind you, that one's quite a useful conversation starter. If you're that way inclined. Which of course I'm not.
And the heel is so thin, cracks in pavements can be a hazard, so one has to be continually aware of where one puts one's feet when out and about. Again, this can have the effect of improving your walk, giving one a dainty, feminine gait.
Of course, as anyone who's read my blogs or seen my pics will know, I've had years of experience at wearing (and surviving in) completely impractical and/or restrictive clothing. But I started young, so lack of years is really no excuse for slobbing around. And I am beginning to wonder whether my advanced years may in fact be causing a rather dangerously cavalier attitude, which may be my downfall:
Perhaps standing on a (wobbling) kitchen chair in the early evening failing light wearing a tight pencil skirt (the one in my Big Foot blog actually, but now sewn up to give a small 2" backsplit) was not the best way to put up Christmas fairy lights on my garden tree this year.
Perhaps going for a walk on a steep pebbly beach on a blustery day wearing pointy-toe boots and a fishtail skirt with a long train was not the easiest way to have an after-dinner Boxing Day stroll. (N.B. not RoSa boots of course – much too precious for this kind of escapade, but the toes were just long enough to keep getting caught in the billowing train, causing me to stumble and trip rather more frequently than would have normally been the case after most of a bottle of wine).
Perhaps my ankle-length hobbleskirt (the one in my Christmas Presents blog) in which I can only take tiny, tiny steps was not the best thing to wear to a Christmas Eve party with all my family, who had to stand shivering in the freezing cold at nearly one in the morning, waiting for me to catch up so they could get in the car. I had to be picked up and slung over my husband's shoulder to avoid family bloodshed. I giggled all the way home, but I seem to remember no-one else was laughing….
On the other hand, perhaps these slight errors of judgement are nothing to do with my age after all. I did once years ago pop to the shops with my (1980's) batwing-sleeve leather jacket on upside down.
Do you think I should just give up? What would VeeDub say?