OK, I've noticed a recent trend in MOST lesbo bars I've been to, Dyke on Dyke fighting.  I don't mean the fraudulent  "DTO gangs" reported by fox news, but REAl lesbo anger for no logical reason.

WTF? I don't get it. I appreciate the drama, I do, but what's the need for all the anger?

NOW, don't get me wrong, I know I tend to get  a lil' lippy on occasion, this I know, but 9 times out of  10, my brutal smackdown comes verbally, not with fists of fury. And I also know that, when placed with decent comedic timing, a joke can diffuse a situation. Sometimes, it doesn't go so well, but it's usually better then throwing a punch and yellin'.

Last weekend we were traveling and we did a show.  Afterwards, I was sitting outside having a smoke,with my ladyfriend, when the bar door flew open and a dyke decided that the whole fucking outside world needed to hear her fucking dyke drama.

I hate it when self righteous, self important baby dykes feel the need to air their dirty laundry for the whole world to see, in order to get attention they can't seem to generate with their awesome personalities. So, as this girl was publically berating her "friends" (and yes, she wasn't talking to me, and many will say that I should mind my own business, BUT how long do we al have to sit and listen to your desparate cry for attention?) I made a lighthearted comment "HEY Black Shirt, You're Really MAD, huh?"

Well, that was enough for her to redirect her anger and start making her way towards me. NOW, here's where you can decide if this was the right move... I stood Up, that's all, stood up, mainly because I was sitting on a curb, and if she WAS going to try to fight me, and I mean TRY (I'll explain in a minute what a sorry attempt it was) I thought I had best not be at foot level 'cause it was gonna get my face...

I stand Up, my lovely girlfriend tries to diffuse it, and then Blackshirt (her new name) can't let it go and attampts to either push or take a swing at me, I couldn't really decipher what it really was, and in all her effort and all her fucking toughness and all her self righteous need to hate everyone around her because she wasn't gettin enough hugs at home...she fell. That's right, she missed and fell on her fucking ass...This Amazing display of toughness, led me to snicker a bit, and I honestly thought that was enough embarassment for the girl.

NOPE, now she has to reach out on her way down and grab my hair.

WHO the fuck pulls hair? WHO ? How fucking tough does that make you look? really? Pulling hair? It's so disgraceful, that even her local buddies turned around and were like, "are you fucking kidding me, you're pulling hair?"

and then she just held onto it, and my face is close to her, and I'm saying to her, "c'mon, what are you going to do right now? Cause yourealize I have your arm with one, my left hand, and my Right hand is free to do whatever the fuck i want, let it go"

she didn't. BUT I don't hit people. end of story, so I waited patiently for someone to get her to let go and then she left, and I laughed ALOT, we all did actually.  I think it's interesting that this girl didn't see the show, but immediately started the "what you think you're funny, you fucking comic, you think you're so fuckin' important, fuckin comic"   I'm sure there was a reference to my ghetto booty as well, and maybe even a blond joke..she was a smart one!

REALLY, that's the best you got, you waste of fucking space?

so, let me say this, for the record: I  will more often then not, jump into a fight to break it up, because i'm a big kid, and when you grow up a big kid, you realize that you're good at breaking things up, and most of the time, You're stronger then most of the fighters.

Does anyone know why there is so much fighting, why we must now divide ourselves? For all the younger girls , dykes coming up, I know the world is tough, but you know what? you got it pretty fucking easy compared to the dykes that came before you, so the next time you're all coked up, or just plain mad because the world is tough, why don't you try to redirect that anger against the folks that actively try to prevent your happiness. Write a letter to your senator, change some laws, do something other than create more drama, more reasons for haters to justify their anger towards the gay population at a whole..

And remember that the 40 year old woman that you're too cool to acknowledge because her hair isn't "cool", probably lost a job, a family or her personal safety, because it wasn't always ok to go to a gay bar, and she knows that fighting amongst lesbos was saved for REAL important times, because they were too busy trying to fight the real fight, those who would kill them for loving, so they stuck together.

and Black shirt, if you're reading this. we should have a beer. and if you're still mad,  I hope you realize that sometmies, we all lose our cool.  But a beer and a chat feels much better than a handful of hair...

peace,

Becker