... in most people, i think.  anytime you cram-pack many populations of people into a small contained space, some will show signs of wear.

for the most part, things have been okay.  jan was mostly desolate job-hunting and being an internet shut-in.  feb things started to pick up, but so much that i was pretty frantic for two weeks straight.  part had to do with my new govt job that makes no sense and the other were from random encounters with crazy people.

i wish that i could go into the details of my kafka-esque g-job, but i think i may wind up with an audit or worse.  so suffice it to say it's wreaked havoc w/my schedge and for little or no money.

on top of that, my roommate unleashed her inner crazy on me a few days ago after i confronted her about helping herself to my things.  why is it that people always blame YOU for the crap that they're pulling??  oh yeah, it's called blaming the victim...

also had an erratic scheduling experience with a friend/acquaintance which torpedoed other people's plans and left me flummoxed.

anyways, i kinda digress.  my theory is that some of these folk are crazy because they're in new york.  you are forced to share close quarters with different people that may test you, and the energy that is required just to survive here takes it out of you.  esp. if you're overbooked and running around from one obligation to the other.  if any little thing slips out of place, your whole little world crumbles.  plus a lot of people aren't suited for shared living or confrontation, yet you're forced to coexist out of necessity.

i feel that anxiety sometimes but don't let it get the best of me.  because when push comes to shove, i always head for the nearest exit...

march is all about fresh starts.  am shedding trappings and looking fwd to being a bit more productive and creative.  and then getting the hell outta dodge...

al