I can't tell you fully how much people talking during movies annoys me.  I have few words.  In fact,  I have LOTS of words!

Jason and I went to the movies on Monday night.  I got free tickets through the local paper, so we made the effort to meet up at South Brisbane for an evening of entertainment together.  It was a preview screening of "Vantage Point" and we were pretty keen to see it, especially since it was being shown on the huge IMAX screen.

Unfortunately, a local Brisbane radio station  (most likely "Radio Old-Fogeys-Only-Thanks" which undoubtedly just plays safe songs from the 50s and 60s with the occassional polka) had also been giving out free passes, so the cinema was filled with an audience of various ages.

Frustratingly, out of all the seats we could have chosen, we picked seats in front of Mr and Mrs 80-Not-Out.
There's nothing like seeing an action-suspence movie WITH A PERSONAL RUNNING COMMENTARY ALL THE WAY THROUGH IT.

I kid you not, there wasn't one single silent 5 minute stretch where this couple didn't state the obvious or comment on something that just happened in the movie.

"Ah.  He's got a camera."
"Oh. Now we're going to see it from this man's point of view."
"He has a gun!"
"Oh.  He just killed him!"

ARRRRGHHHHH!

Even the high action car chase scene was filled with enough "Oh!s" and "Wow!s" and "Whoa!s" that for a moment I thought that the elderly couple were actually driving the vehicles.

Sadly, it seemed like the couple must have also been hard of hearing because my angry "SHHHHHH!s" and "Oh, for **** sake!s" appeared to fall on deaf ears.

I mean, really people, if I want a running dialogue, I'd buy the DVD and watch the special features commentary section with subtitles.

So, is it illegal to punch movie-chatterers in the face?  I'm going to have to investigate that one, because I'm sure there is a sub-clause in there to say that it is permitable providing you have given the preliminary "SHHHH!" warning 5 minutes before hand.