I really would like to know how the one person on this earth who is supposed to love you the most could hurt you and not even care. Once again my mother is being herself, which I can usually just shrug off and let go, but this time not only has she made me mad...she has hurt me and has opened some very old wounds she inflicted in the past.
She called the police on me and told a flat out lie and I am not sure, but I think her motive is money. She and I have both spoken to Tyler's probation officer and the probation officer told me my mother did say Tyler could live with her if the judge ordered him to leave my home. I was just waiting for the court date and dealing with Tyler the best I could until then. Well, on Wednesday he pushed it too far. I was late coming home from work, so rather than wait on the sunporch (which is fully enclosed and heated) he opted to force open the back door. This is the third time he has done this, not to mention he doesn't show up after school and leaves home without meknowing where he is, he calls me fucking stupid, tells me I am a shitty mother and he just got in trouble at school for going to the middle school and threating to beat up a kid several years younger then he is. Besides the fact that I am pissed that he keeps destroying my stuff and disrespecting me and everyone in the house, I am concerned about who he is with and what he is doing when he takes off. I gave him two choices...go and live with his grandmother now or I was going to call the cops for the door he forced in and anytime he didn't come home I would call and report him as a runaway. He called my mom she said I would have to write a letter saying he could go with her. I wrote the letter and release for her to get him emergency medical care and authorization for her to have all his educational records and the authority to make all decisions related to his educational needs and placement.

She arrives to pick him up and remains in the car as always. He goes out and comes back in and says she won't take the letter I have written because she wants me to state that I had kicked him out of my home. Tyer tells me she wants to talk to me and asks if I would please go outside and talk with her. I put my jacket on and the closer I get to the door the more the thought of seeing makes my stomach hurt, so I called her. She tells me she wants me to put on the letter that I am kicking him out and I tell her I am not kicking him out he had the option of staying, but I was calling the cops for the door and from now on when he didn't come home from school. She tells me she will keep him until Sunday, but that I had to sign a paper saying he could stay the weekend. I told her she was nuts and to forget it he could just stay home and the courts would figure it out, because I couldn't deal with her. She said she had to protect herself because she thought I would call the police and say she took him if he went for the weekend. Stupid bitch had a paper in her hand saying he could live there how would I call the cops on her? It was just more drama she could cause in front of my son. Anyway, she refuses to allow him to stay past Sunday unless I say I kicked him out. I tell her he needs to come in and she says I don't have to give him back I have the signed paper. So what the fuck was that? I won't keep him....I won't let you have him back. She was stuck because her plan to get me to say I kicked him out didn't work.
Anyway, they leave, she won't answer her phone and I am pretty sure what she is going to do next...so I called the police and I explained the situation to the officer (who has been at the house before) show him the papers and tell him I am pretty sure she is going to try and say I kicked him out. I told him I had given him the two choices and as we were talking I'll be damned if the bitch didn't call and say I kicked Tyler out. The officer spoke to the detective (who was responsible for locking Tyler up last time) and told him about the door and explained he had been out a few weeks prior and Tyler was a problem then. He told me he would write an Incident Report to make sure my call and the other runs to the house could be pulled up by the courts to help prove what was really going on. They asked if I wanted Tyler home I told them I did not and that we were planning on him living there anyway and that my call was to protect myself from my mother.

Tyler called on Thanksgiving and said he forgot some of his meds and his grandma wanted to know how is was going to get them. I told him his grandma could drive him over and get them out of the mail box he just needed to tell me when to put them outside. I told him she would either be bringing him home Sunday or taking him to school Monday, so she be making the trip anyway. He said he might be living there, so that just proves she has got herself trapped and is going to need a few days to wiggle out of it. She took him, but won't tell him if he gets to stay.

The reason I think this is about money is the one conversation I had with her about this was one day last week when Tyler said she needed to talk to me. She asked about SSI for him and his medicaid and told me she has already called DCS to see if they will pay her for having him. She found out she won't get paid unless he is a ward of the court and she thought if I kicked him out and he was homeless she may be able to get money. She told how she didn't think it was fair that her retirement would have to for Tyler because he would be living with her. I told her that first thing was she needed to talk with Tyler about it being unfair, as his actions were the reason he would not be living with me. Then I mentioned that the boy was almost 17 and should probably be getting a job and learning how to support himself, unless of course she was going to allow him to stay and she was going to support him after he was eighteen. I din't think of it at the time, but if things were so desperate with money she could use the money she spends on him for Christmas for the newest electronics that he just sells anyway. And she wouldn't have to buy Christmas for anyone else in my family, because we won't be around. And most importantly, I wish I would have told her she should have thought about how this would effect her when she kept sticking her nose in where it didn't belong after being warned several times. She empowers him by going against me, so she has to deal with the monster she helped create. Why would he listen and do what he doesn't want when his mamaw will buy him what he needs or give him money when he wants or tell his mom how horrible she is when she won't give him his way. Why would he even bother to listen to me when he knows he will get what he wants?

She has already said I have to pay her child support. I will pay her if the courts order me to, but if they base it on her income compared to mine, like they do when ordering support when parents are involved, she will be lucky to get $30 a week. Don't get me wrong I am not opposed to helping financially with Tyler and if I thought he needed it or he would go without I would not even hesitate. I just have a problem giving her anything for him because he will sit up there with anything he wants while I have to struggle to get the girls what the NEED. But, it just shows how much she doesn't care about the girls. They refer to her as Tyler's grandma, because they say she is not a grandma to them. I was asking another person how she could do this and they said it was exactly what she did to us when we were kids. My sister was all she talked about and some people she worked with were surprised to learn my brother and I existed. (No disrespect to my sister, I have never blamed her and never will.)

Putting my anger aside, she is hurting me more than anyone ever has in my entire life. I wrote a letter to her and posted it on my blog last night, but I removed it because I am not even a mean enough person to tell others what she put me through. But, there is one thing she put me through when I was about 16 that hurt me and has continued to hurt me all of my life. She knows what she did and has acted as if it didn't happen. She left me alone to deal with it and I will never ever forgive her for the way she went about it. All she is doing with Tyler is bringing back the pain she caused me when I was 16 and she doesn't even fucking care. She cares about getting some fucking money. And what she did to me when I was 16 wasn't bad enough, but to add insult to injury she forged my name on my tax return to pay for it. She could have used my fucking tax money to pay for me to get some help with what she put me through, but instead she stole from me and ignored the pain I was in, because it was too painful for her to face and she was a grown woman.

So mom, if you read this...Fuck all the money you say I owe you from the past. That fucking money won't even begin to cover what you owe me and what you took from me and what you put me through.

Damn....all that and I still don't feel better!