Christmas in an Italian family is usually an absolute free for all. This year was no exception.

I arrive at the Rulli family home to see my dad has the movie "A Christmas Story" on - and absolutely blaring. He's got surround sound speakers everywhere, but like in a very unprofessional way. There's a speaker just sitting randomly on the couch. Another one is over by the cats litterbox. You never know where you'll get a speaker. I have yet to explain to him that "surround sound" doesn't literally mean being surrounded by sound in every room of the house. But oh well. Bigger worries ahead. It is Christmas, after all.

So everyone slowly shows up. Anywhere between like 6 and 8 pm seems appropriate, I guess. There's no order to it all.

Once everyone is there, and the food is ready, it's time to say grace. Which means there is the annual fight about who has to say grace. I lost, as always.

My dad's argument this year was "You host a daily 3 hour Catholic radio show!" So apparently I've become the go-to guy on all things grace. And not just a "Bless us, Lord and these thine gifts..." type of grace. My family expects GRACE.

But I expect quiet during grace. And unfortunately, with "A Christmas Story" still in the background, people's cellphones ringing and text messages arriving... good luck.

And now that I've got this radio show, my entire family is aware I'll be talking about these things on the show. So they want to be characters on the show. They're always asking things like, "Are you gonna bring this up? Is this material for the show?" Everyone is auditioning.

After dinner, I'm talking to a cousin about my computer. He's a big fan of computers, so I mentioned I had a problem with my laptop and went ot the apple store. But he was really bummed out when I said the words "apple store" – because someone stole his computer. He was with some friends, and 2 guys broke into the house, with ski masks, and a gun, and stole his computer. Is that not the most random Christmas story of all time!?

And then we do our annual tradition, which is to read The Gospel of Luke, Chapter 2:
In those days a decree went out from Caesar Augustus that the whole world should be enrolled. This was the first enrollment, when Quirinius was governor of Syria. So all went to be enrolled, each to his own town. And Joseph too went up from Galilee from the town of Nazareth to Judea, to the city of David that is called Bethlehem, because he was of the house and family of David, to be enrolled with Mary, his betrothed, who was with child. While they were there, the time came for her to have her child, and she gave birth to her firstborn son. She wrapped him in swaddling clothes and laid him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn.

Unfortunately we couldn't find a Bible. And after about 10 minutes of searching, my dad found an old 70's version, called THE WAY. And it had all these funky translations... like instead of swaddling clothes they had the Baby Jesus in polyester or something. It was a train wreck of a Bible.

We then sang some Christmas carols so out of tune that 2 of my cousins recorded it on their cellphones for posterity. It will probably end up as an embarrassing YouTube video soon.

Nonetheless, it was Christmas. And however you celebrated it, or whatever awkwardness came along with it, it's all about the birth of Christ. God made man for our salvation. So it's always a Merry Christmas!

And a Merry Christmas to you, as well.