Wow. Tonight I was at amazing concert put on by my best friend Jeremy and his girlfriend Anna. They opened for a guy by the name of Ross King. I have heard of Ross before through another friend but had never really listened or checked out his music. So tonight I went with the intentions of finding who and what he was about. All I can say is I was challenged, touched and blessed by his music. One song really spoke to me tonight as he explained its meaning and preformed it. Its called "The Non-Religious Me". I will let the words speak. But this is pretty much what I have felt over the 6 months specifically with stepping away from the church that I was involved in and really just searching God out. Its been really a struggle for me the past 6 months to be honest, and I have felt like I am on a lonely journey most of the time. I am thankful that I can cling to Christ. That He is always there for me. I however think this is no excuse not to show Christ's love to others.

I picked up the CD that this song is on tonight and want to include the "footnotes" of what Ross King wrote about the song also. The CD is entitled "Perhaps I've Said Too Much". In addition to this song. There is also some other amazing songs on here and have really challenged me. Even though I have only gotten to listen half way through. Anyway this is what I have been feelings, thinking, frustrated with and dealing with. This is a good summery of that, and he does a good job at putting it into words.

From the CD insert:

"When are we going to learn that really spiritual people still have legitimate bouts with unbelief? When are we going to learn how to help and give grace to these people? When are we going to learn that, sometimes, bible study and worship music and good preaching aren't enough? Real Life - Real Healing, Real Forgiveness, Real Power, Real Freedom - Happens when we learn to love each other as Christ Loves US. The reason why we don't do it is because its so hard."



The Non-Religious Me
?Words and music by ross king
?© 2005 ross king


I couldn't find You in the sermons
?I couldn't find You in the songs
?I couldn't find You Sunday morning
?And that's when I knew something had gone wrong
?I couldn't see You in the reading
?I couldn't hear You in my prayers
?I couldn't feel You in my feelings
?And I began to fear that You weren't there


Then I thought I heard a sound
?Somewhere in me
?You said to stoop way down
?And that's where You'd be


I never thought I'd find You here
?Way down in my shame and fear
?I never thought that You'd draw near to this
?My faithlessness
?I never thought to look for You
?In this ditch that I've been crawling thru
?I never thought You'd listen to the plea
?Of the non-religious me


They told me they'd be praying for me
?And then they showed me to the door
?They made it clear that they'd ignore me
?Until I wasn't struggling anymore
?That's when I started feeling guilty
?This must've been my fault somehow
?If only I'd been stronger, maybe
?I would not be in this mess right now


Then I saw a nail-scarred hand
?Bleeding on me
?You said, "I understand"
?And You showed me mercy


I never thought I'd find You here
?Way down in my shame and fear
?I never thought that You'd draw near to this
?My faithlessness
?I never thought to look for You
?In this valley I've been crawling thru
?I never thought You'd listen to the plea
?Of the non-religious me


If we have no room for strugglers
?Where are they to go for answers?
?Didn't Jesus ask His Father for another way?
?And what does that say
?About the way we handle
?People when they're faith is fragile?
?Even Jesus slipped and stumbled when He
?Carried the cross
?Now the curse of the law is gone
?And in it's place: amazing grace


Blessed are the poor in spirit
?The Kingdom will belong to them
?Your love is strong but still they fear that
?You would never let them in
?God, I am a true believer
?Help me overcome my unbelief
?I stepped out on the raging water
?And now I'm sinking in the sea


I never thought you'd find me here
?Drowning in my shame and fear
?I never thought that You'd draw near to this
?My faithlessness
?I never thought to look for You
?In this valley I've been crawling thru
?I never thought You'd listen to the plea
?Of the non-religious me


"The Non-Religious Me" words & music by Ross King ©2004 Ross King. Admin. by Ross King. All Rights Reserved.


Emphasis added by me.



http://rosskingmusic.com/freesong/Non-Religious%20me.mp3


http://phobos.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewAlbum?id=263534613&s=143441