Things That Hurt My Ears

Sketch 1:  Glass & Steel  (audio track on page)

As most of you know, I've been dealing with some major ear problems the last couple of years (actually, just realized it's approaching three).  For those of you who don't know, I have Tinnitus, or constant ringing, and Hyperacusis, or extreme sound sensitivity.

Basically, it's neurological -- my brain misinterprets ordinary sounds, mostly those high-pitch in nature, such as dishes clanging, the speak of car breaks, people laughing, etc. as sounds that are hurting me.  This triggers neck, ear, and jaw tension, causes fatigue and frequent headaches, exacerbates the ringing and causes occasional dizziness.

Over the last 34 months I have been going through countless forms of therapy with audiologists, doctors and neurologists -- all without a whole lot of success (good news is that things are not getting worse and have improved since 2006).

Anyway, yesterday I decided to take my therapy in a new, positive direction:  I'm turning those painful trigger sounds into music (with ear-plugs, of course!).

It "hurts my ears" to do dishes, so the first improvisation deals with metal and glass objects:  household plates, glasses, and pots and pans.  Also included in this 1 minute and 15 second sketch are metallic bells and a kalimba ("thumb piano").

When my ear problems started, I had no idea they would last this long; I had very little clue that I could end up living the rest of my life with them.  But one thing is for sure: even though Tinnitus and Hyperacusis have been the worst things I've ever had to deal with, my ear problems have opened up a whole new set of possibilities for me.  And because of my ear problems, I have found a passion for composing and playing guitar that I never knew existed.  The music I am writing is more representative of me than anything I have ever done.  And for that I am grateful.

Thanks to all of you for your support.
-Joel

P.S.  There will be many more audio sketches to come.  And my first solo guitar album with cellist Katinka Kleijn will be available soon!  So stay tuned!!