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Current mood:  awake Category: Blogging
"A true friend gives freely, advises justly, assists readily, adventures boldly, takes all patiently, defends courageously, and continues a friend unchangeable." --William Penn
To those of you who still come around these parts, even though my presence has been spotty, at best, I'm grateful for you. Thank you. I've often thought I'd drop this site completely, but then I would lose some of what makes me happy. That is, having a little sounding board over here, where I can potentially reach more people. Since my goal is world domination, this site becomes much more instrumental.
But somewhere along the lines, I lost everything that made this place what it was for me. Now I struggle with wondering if I want that back. Sure, it's fun to interact, but make no mistake, it takes a lot of time and dedication.
On the whole, I miss it. I miss the days where comments took on a life of their own and each person interacted with not only me, but the others commenting. It's how so many of us came to be as close as we are today.
And then I go and do something like this and close off comments so that you can't interact, even if you wanted to.
I know, I know, I'm such a bitch. However, I will try to make you laugh all the same.
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The Princess and the Giant Cock
She was applying her foundation when her little boy spoke up. "What are you doing?"
"I'm putting on my makeup, so that I look pretty."
He thought for a moment and then asked, "Why don't you put it on the inside of your nose? That way, your boogers will see a beautiful girl," *dramatic pause* "before they DIE!"
She laughed and giggled at the thought of boogers dying. Is that what happens when you mash them in your tissue? Are they really alive? Are there organisms living in them that DO meet their death via tissue?
Doesn't matter, one must get to work. She packed up her little bundle of joy and hauled him to day care, then trudged off to work.
Upon her arrival at her office, she sat down at her desk. A very uneasy feeling swept across her. NO it did not "flood her pelvic region", thank you very much.
It was unmistakable. The zipper on her pants was down. She reached to the side to pull it back up and found that the entire length of the zipper had popped open. The little pully-dooma-flochy-thing-a-ma-jig had ripped off of one side and was a snarled, mangled mess.
NOW WHAT? She rummaged through her drawers - the ones to her desk, pigs - and found the little metal doo-hickeys that generally hold ace bandages in place. What the hell? She attached them to the side of her pants to keep them in place while she decided what to do next.
A little witch on a social networking site suggested binder clips. She found some smallish ones and attached 5 of them to the side of her pants. They did the job perfectly and almost looked like little black and silver buckles. One may mistake it for a high-fashion belt if she positioned herself correctly.
She sat back down and began working. It was then that she heard the department chairman talking in the hallway. He peeked in her office, mentioned something about getting a daily dose of optimism from her, chuckled in spite of himself and walked away.
"Giant cock," she muttered under her breath, as he walked away and she continued on about her morning. At some point, things were bound to get better.
Little did she know that "some point" sometimes means "never". And so, she changed her cell phone number, once again, back to the familiar 804 of long ago.
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4:32 PM
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