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my twisted thoughts... two... sometimes the weirdest shit isn't always in one place...

bjciii



Last Updated: 12/24/2009

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Gender: Male
Status: Single
Age: 34
Sign: Libra

City: WILMINGTON
State: Delaware
Country: US
Signup Date: 4/11/2005

Who Gives Kudos:


Monday, October 08, 2007 

Current mood:  giggly
Category: Goals, Plans, Hopes
So... like, what are you guys's hopes and dreams?

Every time I look at this category marker, I am reminded of that first, awkward conversation that Drew Barrymore's character has in the movie Never Been Kissed with Jessica Alba and the other "cool" girls. Why? Because it's so utterly cliche to use those words in succession, that's why! Every single time I read that category label, I'm flashed back to high school when you're handed that slip of paper, hoping that the people putting together the yearbook have a modicum of information to flesh out the space next to / beneath your picture.

It's bullshit.

Yes, as humans, we all have goals. We all have plans, and we do all have hopes as well as dreams. To announce them means that we're opening ourselves up to public ridicule if we fall short. How many people never admit that, even though they are plugging away at medical school, they desperately want to be a dancer? How about those men who are slaving away at their high-paying finance job who want nothing more than to don a huge chef's cap, and bake cakes?

Yes, friends, unfortunately our "plans" sometimes interfere with our hopes and dreams. What was John Lennon's famous quote? The one that EVERYONE ended up quoting in their senior yearbook? "Life is what happens to you when you're busy making other plans." Just because we've got goals and desires, doesn't mean that life won't let loose that hellish curveball that leaves us swinging at nothing but air.

However, sometimes we connect and send that beautiful, hanging curveball deep over the fence. Myself, I graduated from The University of Delaware with a degree in English, but ended up in computers. Why? Because I had a talent for it. I was miserable, but making money. Then the curveball: I got laid off. Not just me, but our entire building. Best thing that ever happened, because I learned that my dream, my hope, my goal was to teach.

I got to live it out.

It hasn't always been easy and I haven't always been great at it, but I have learned something new about myself: It's possible to make a living at something you love. Not only that, but it makes it easier to love yourself and be loved by others.

Maybe my goal always was to be happy, but now it's my reality too. Sure, I plan to have a family. I plan to finish my novel. I plan to move to a house with a driveway and, just maybe, an in-ground pool, but I can tell you with no hesitation: sometimes curveballs are welcome additions to the at-bat known as life. It makes me think that, whatever we plan on doing, we aren't always going to go according to plan.

Jacta Alea Est! Not hardly... more like: that bitch is still rolling and we won't know where it lands until our final breath. I kinda like that idea.
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Susan

 
I think I'm waiting for my curveball.
 
Posted by Susan on Sunday, November 04, 2007 - 5:56 PM
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