One day, while I was in New York City, it rained elephants and cows. I bought an umbrella for $1.00. Black, indescript. I wondered by myself through some streets, jumping over potholes and gaping gutters full of rain whilst sporting very slippery, soggy, flip-flops. My long crocheted skirt soaked up the elephants and cows quite thoroughly. I slodged and squeeked by the Fluevog Shoes store and drueled against the window, mesmirized by the deliciously quirky footware. I dared not go in. (1.) I knew that all the shoes that I would probably take an especial fancying to were probably in the $200 range, and (2.) I was embarassed at my probable drenched, scraggamuffin appearance. So, I slodged, squeeked, and flippedy-flopped onward, and finally found a bookstore....where I could make a better impression by soggying some expensive paper products. I slopped in, and left the umbrella at the door in the umbrella pile (like a good, considerate customer). But before doing so, I wrapped the handle of my property, right then, with a Sophie & the Probiotics [previous band] sticker, so that someone could not, would not, mistake their black, indescript umbrella for mine. I went over to the ART section, excitedly grabbed a Max Earnst book and settled in for a while. After thumbing through this inspiring but expensive book, and deciding not to buy it, I wondered over to the coffeeshop area. I was probably dreaming and moping about some future love of my life, a bit lonely, but enjoying some unique vanilla herba matte tea and general people-watching.......this must've been about the time when, low-and-behold, by the crappy, antigraces of some demon somewhere, someone snagged my $1.00 umbrella. Despite MY STICKER!! For, when I went to fetch it, as I was leaving the store, it was nowhere to be seen :( ...........Dirty, rotten....... - Breathe - .......That's OK, the incident didn't dampen my spirits, especially, because it had pretty much stopped raining by the time I left the bookstore; however, it did make me think about the time I lived in Taipei, Taiwan with my mom (I was 16). Taiwan, like other tropicalish places, has a heavy-duty rainy season (more like mastadons and mammoths than elephants and cows). The entire rainy season came and went, all the while we left our sopping umbrellas in a tub or can by the doors of various shops, grocery stores, etc., and not once did anyone steal or mistake our umbrellas. And the ONE day I use an umbrella in New York City....SNATCH! Oh well, it was only a dollar.