My best friend from my Indiana days came to visit last week. I hadn't seen him since we both left IU in 1985. That year is on my mind a lot these days. In many ways, it was the most pivotal year of my life, for better or worse.

I know that many of my "friends" were not even born in 1985, or at least have no memory of it. 1985 was not a terrifically memorable year. It saw the second inauguration of Ronald Reagan. William "the Refrigerator" Perry and Chicago Bears pummeled every other team in the NFL. Mikhail Gorbachev became leader of the Soviet Union.

I began the year as an apprentice with the Sarasota Opera. I had ALMOST finished my MM at IU in December, but got so involved in auditioning (and a new girlfriend) that I didn't do my MM recital and I dropped the one class I needed to finish. While an apprentice at Sarasota I met my first wife, who was also an apprentice.

In the fall I had visited North Texas State University (now UNT) and applied for the DMA program. In Sarasota, EVERYONE told me this was a bad idea, including Sharon, who would be my first wife. I was told that would kill my career, and I should get my butt to New York.

I went back to Indiana, and found that my girlfriend had gotten back with her previous boyfriend, and I started a "long-distance" relationship with Sharon. I visited her in NY several times, and even auditioned for the NY City Opera chorus. I got called back, but didn't get in!

Well, Sharon and I got serious, and we decided to get married, and go to Texas. That decision to do the DMA and not pursue a performing career haunts me to this day. I cannot blame her, of course, since it was my own idea.

I think of that decision just about every day of my life. Obviously we can never go back and change the past, and the further you go along one path the harder it is to change. Do I have regrets? Sure, but who doesn't. I guess the biggest regret I have is not finding out whether or not I really had the "stuff" for a big career. I will have to content myself with the kinds of regional performances I am getting now.

But, I feel like I have made a difference in a lot of lives. For the better I hope! Do I have a point? Yes. We all make choices, and have to live with the consequences of those choices. Sometimes our choices are made for us, but we all have to "play the cards we are dealt."

My advice to young people is to think ahead. And ask yourself, "What do I REALLY want?" Imagine how it will be not just now, but years down the road. Make no mistake, I consider myself a very lucky man. I get paid to listen to great music. I am surrounded by talented, committed young singers. (Well, most of them anyway!) It's a good life...