On a completely different note...Im feeling beat up after a tough rehearsal (not Lisa Parade). I dont like feeling unworthy...I used to feel that way a lot, but I try not let anyone make me feel that way anymore. They tried to tonite....well actually only one person. Thats bullshit. The truth is, its what has held him back his whole life!!! If you believe that you don't have a right to play, or feel good about playing or not worthy of experiencing music then thats your problem, and it will hold you back...it HAS held you back...your belief in that...no more, I used to think that way...dont talk down to me. I dont deserve that and I wont believe a word you say from now on...

OK, got that out. Do I seem frustrated? Its my fucking day, anyway!! and life is too short.