I'm sure I and many others have used that phrase...the blog title. Tonight it is so appropriate.

Cali ate my favorite pair of Sam Edelman sandals. =-(   *tears*  We did not speak for much of the night. I was disappointed with her earlier today for not executing her commands so I crated her. This started the tit for tat that ended with her noshing on my shoes. She is sooo my dog...little shit! lol All is well and I've 2 new pair from Sam to replace them...plus I will hunt til I find this pair...somewhere! They shall not elude me! lol *evilgrin*

Ev canceled her weekly dinner with the boys, even though it's only Dan that has gone. She did that yesterday. I guess she was sick...felt like flu symptoms I guess. I did not inquire because that might imply that I care. I am getting good at the "Thanks for the information" or "thanks for your concern". I appreciate your help London! Good phrase and the more I use it the easier it is to deal with. Anywho...she sent an email this evening basically saying she is done contacting the kids. If they want to talk to her they can call. I don't know if weekly dinners are off...I will wait til next week and see what happens. She is disappointed that the boys didn't call her to see if she was alright. Their grandfather was in the hospital for a couple days and she asked them to call...they did not. Once again she was hurt. Ev told her parents that we wouldn't let the boys see them...when in reality she was keeping the boys from seeing them because of her issues with them. The boys have not regularly seen their grandparents in years. Not my fault at all....in my mind...I carry no guilt...I feel badly for them that their daughter screwed their relationship...but once again...not my fault. 

I was wondering if I have raised 2 awful self-centered teenagers... that they would not even call their mother to see if she or their grandfather was okay. I guess the simple answer to a stranger would be yes. To myself, my family, and friends I think not. I think of the years of drunken abuse the boys endured. I honestly believe that if she was a good parent and an alcoholic things may have been different. I'm not sure that's even possible...but I think it could have been. The boys are old enough to remember (in my opinion) lies she told about their father, me, and I'm sure lies about them. She put them in situations where they had to be the adult which robbed them of childhood  moments. She made them out to be liars to cover her own alcoholic lies. She threw them out of the house on a couple occassions that I know of. There has got to be more that Dave and I know nothing of.

I ask myself if I would care if I were them. I can't answer that. I simply know that I do not care about her. I have not nastily replied to any of her emails. She knows I could have. She knows that she has created this...she doesn't need my reminder. The biggest reminder is her children's absence from her life. I can answer that...I would not care if I were them. My parents are weird. I disliked my parents for doing their best to raise me...I didn't like their methods...however they worked. I could not imagine being treated like the boys have been and ever speaking to my mother again. Just me. They can and will make thier own choices. I think I have told both of them that if they want things to improve they need to be open and honest with their feelings. They need to speak with her for change to occur. That is all I will say.

I truly believe the boys will make good choices. Dave and I have done our best to raise the boys well. Are they spoiled...hell yes. Despite this I know they have the tools to be great men. I know she has shown them what not to be, what type of person not to date and/or marry...she may have also shown them perseverance. Despite her errors she continues to try to improve things. For whatever the reason...she tries. I may have been too quick, too unforgiving, too sharp tongued...they know why. I hope they have the best from us all...what trait that might be...along with the savy to make it all click. Time will tell.

Snotface(Cali as I lovingly call her) has let herself out of the crate, who is she fucking poo-dini? She started scratching on the bedroom door..so this must be my clue to return to bed. May sleep come quickly!