some things i'm thinking about right now:
new years resolutions are for fucktards.
that's first of all.
has a new years resolution EVER EVER EVER been kept or followed through with or achieved? EVER? no. don't be stupid and don't be a liar and don't set dubious goals for 2008. there's your resolution, fucktard.
i mean, face it: you're fat. you smoke. you drink too much. sometimes you dress up like a dragon and hide in the ball pit at chuck e. cheese so you can scared the fuck out of little kids. we ALL have these issues. january 1st is not a fucking cure-all. quit if you want to quit. quit in june. quit on september 27th. stop using new years as an excuse, because, sorry, fucktard.it just doesn't work.
second of all, if you have vanity plates, fuck off. i probably hate you.
this is another thing that just boggles the mind. has there ever been a funny vanity plate? EVER? no. has there ever been a reason -- i mean a REAL reason -- to put some inane fucking message on your license plate? guess what? i don't care if you LUV DAVE or if you're driving MOMS LEX or that you have a LCNS2DRV or BLT4SPD or it's JENS BUG or MY MINI or you're a KMELEON or XOSTED. it's not cute and it's not funny and your license plate might as well say TTLDCHBG. That's my attempt at vanity-plating "total douchebag." i'm not very good at it, clearly. thank god. i saw one recently on a ferrari that said MNY2WSTE and it was the closest i've ever been to murdering a man.
it rained a bit in LA this week and all hell broke loose. STORM WATCH '08 slashed across my TV screen every time the news came on and at every commercial break. STAY WITH US FOR FULL COVERAGE OF THE MASSIVE STORMS THAT ARE ATTACKING LOS ANGELES, AND HOW YOU CAN KEEP YOUR FAMILY SAFE AND DRY.
it rained. not even for that long or that heavily, really. i could practically hear the rest of the country laughing at us. it was louder than the thunder. because there was no fucking thunder.
the news reports scared the fucking bejeezus out of me. i thought LA was going to be soaked right off the map.i thought it was going to be katrina in LA. i thought i was going to have to spend the next month living in the staples center. that didn't happen. but i did forget to put the cover on my bbq, so it got a little bit wet and may eventually rust slightly, so that was pretty scary.
it's only tuesday and i'm already having one of those weeks where i wanna smash everyone's face. can you tell?