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"I got so much trouble on my mind. Refuse to lose". Chuck D
Well it only happens once a year my friends. No, not my birthday (although that is coming up soon). I'm talking about the annual VH1 "Hip Hop Honors" show. This year was the 6th edition and I have to say, despite some high points, there were a lot of low points.
So let me break it down from start to finish.
The show began with a really stupid skit where Tracy Morgan was dressed as a preacher and backed by a choir. He started running his mouth about Def Jam history. This was really boring. since he was already in costume, he should have re-enacted the Arsenio Hall scene from Coming To America instead. If VH1 was serious about honoring Def Jam, they have started the show where it all began & had T La Rock come out and do, at very least, a verse from "It's Yours". But instead they give us Reverend Morgan. Boring. And why was Ed Lover dj'ing instead of Dr. Dre? Hmmmm.
Then came a vignette of LL Cool J telling the story of how he first got signed. I've heard this story a bunch of times but the way he told it here, with the impersonations and such, was really funny.
Next up was The Roots joined by Jazzy Jeff and Eminem paying tribute to LL. This was dope. Jazzy Jeff is so damn smooth on the wheels. And you can really feel the love Em has for LL's early work. This was a real highlight of the show.
Every time they flashed to Rick Rubin all I could keep thinking was Santa & Buddha had a kid. Damn. The Rick Rubin who was on the show tonight must have eaten the Rick Rubin who was in Krush Groove.
All I could do was say "why?" when I saw Jimmy Fallon there. But okay, whatever.
Public Enemy hit the stage and sounded great but, and no dis to Jazzy Jeff, Public Enemy without Terminator X just isn't Public Enemy. And was that Boots Riley from The Coup on stage with them? And why did PE only do one song? "Welcome To The Terrordome" would have been nice.
I have a really funny story I may blog sometime about Kevin Liles and his visit to Santa Cruz back in 94/95. But for now, let's move on.
Scarface & Ludacris were next to spotlight Def Jam South. Scarface was solid but his stage presence was nowhere near Ludacris. That dude just has a really strong energy level.
The Tracy Morgan / Scoop Giles skits sucked big time. He really must have pictures of VH1 execs with farm animals in order to keep hosting this show.
The Beastie Boy tribute was next. The lead dude from Gym Class Heroes had a dope shirt on paying respect to DJ AM (R.I.P.) and Roc Raida (R.I.P.) but having tattoo's all the way up your neck looks super stupid. KRS-One's freestyle was dope. This was also the first time of the night that I asked myself "why do I not know who this Wale' guy is".
Lyor Cohen's story about meeting Warren G was boring.
Hearing Trey Songz makes me miss Nate Dogg, who actually always made me miss Mixmaster Spade (R.I.P.). Since Trey Songz appears to be a modern version of Nate Dogg, that just means for two years he'll sound good on everyone else's tracks. Then he'll make an album of his own, sell maybe 33,000, and then go into obscurity. Cool.
So Clinton Sparks shouts out DJ AM and says nothing about Roc Raida (R.I.P.)? That right there speaks volumes to me about this dude.
Redman & Method Man should have done "How High" instead of what they did. It would have been funny if the IRS would have come out mid-song and cuff up Meth. LOL. Big respect to DJ Scratch for shouting out Roc Raida (R.I.P.). Whoever was mixing the sound for the Mary J. Blige / Method Man performance should be fired. It sounded horrible. Maybe that's was the energy level didn't work for me. They just lacked the chemistry of the original record. But nonetheless, I'm a huge Mary J. Blige fan.
Out of nowhere, next came Onyx. This was interesting to me. First, I'm glad they shouted out Jam Master Jay (R.I.P.). But didn't they sign to Def Jam after they had already had all their hits and the career was basically over? I mean "Slam" & "Throw Your Guns" were on R.A.L., not Def Jam. But okay.
I really liked Chris Lighty's vignette. Very sincere in his words.
Eve walked on stage and one thing was clear. She really should have implants by now.
Ashanti & Ja Rule were next up. This performance really had no chemistry to me. My tv started to form ice when they were on. Ashanti's body is bangin' but damn girl, what was up with the hair do. Seriously, it looked like a dried out Jheri Curl, half Mullet, half Mohawk with lines shaved in the sides. There really was a lot going on there. LMAO.
As they ran another Lyor Cohen vignette, a light bulb went off above my head and I came to the realization that while he may be and incredible behind the scenes genius, Lyor is a really boring to listen to. But it was hilarious when he put Death Row & Bad Boy on blast. That was hot.
Now earlier I mentioned that VH1 didn't bring out T La Rock. So when they brought out Oran Juice Jones, I said to myself "what the f*ck". But it was funny hearing him do the rap from the end of "The Rain". Silly rabbit. Hey! Don't touch that coat. Hahahahaha.
So when I caught my breath from laughing at Oran, I saw that they brought out Kimbo Slice's fat, out of shape brother. Oh I'm sorry. That was Rick Ross. This is about the time I dropped the kids off at the pool.
I got back just in time to see some block head hit the stage to hype the crowd for "Mr. I'll steal your car at the airport and pretend to be a D.E.A. agent" DMX. The dog lover sounded good but in the back of my mind I was thinking how cool it would be to see him beat the shit out of dog killer Michael Vick. Maybe the block head who was acting as his hype man is actually his probation officer or bail bondsman.
As the show was close to ending, I thought about some really glaring omissions from the performance list. Where was 3rd Bass? Where was Original Concept? Where was Jay Z? Where was LL Cool J? Where was Boss? Hmmmm.
Now it was time for the grand finale'. I had deja vu of my junior year of high school when I saw Kid Rock sporting the LL Cool J Troop jacket. That was dope. Wait, could it be? Yes!!!! EPMD is in the house. And just when it couldn't get any better, it did. Sort of. Out came Foxy Brown with boob's a blazing. Good lord those ting were huge. And I am not complaining about that. But what I am complaining about is seeing Fabolous out there with her. Again, I was asking myself "why?". And can anyone tell me what song that was that Ghostface was doing? Totally not his best track. Then Wale' came back out to do Kanye West's "Touch The Sky". Kanye must have been somewhere else throwing a tantrum and couldn't make the show. Not that anybody missed him anyway.
Then Russell Simmons came out and did his "Goodnight & God bless" line and the show was over. That was very predictable. But okay.
So that was it for this years Hip Hop Honors. Clearly, VH1 was trying to create a sort "Motown 25" type show but it didn't work. This was not as entertaining as past shows. Hopefully they bounce back next year.
And with that, I'm out. Thanks for reading. Feel free to comment. Peace.
6:11 AM
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