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Karate High School



Last Updated: 9/24/2009

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Status: Swinger
City: SAN FRANCISCO
Country: US
Signup Date: 4/19/2004

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Thursday, May 07, 2009 
To celebrate the release of our new record Invaders on May 19th, KHS and Interpunk.com have teamed up for a new contest.

Let’s cut right to the chase. If you:

1. Wish you had the ability to fly, or
2. Dream about Brad Pitt giving you a sensual thigh massage, or
3. Want Paul J. McGuire from Karate High School to write a song about you,
 
Then it’s time to celebrate, sister, because I can help you fulfill one of your lifelong dreams. And sorry, no, I don’t have Brad Pitt’s number.

I would, however, love to write a song about you.

All you have to do is visit the following page and enter your first name and email address before May 19th, 2009. That’s it. You don’t have to buy a single thing.

Click here to visit the Interpunk.com contest page

Once the deadline passes, three winners will be randomly picked, and I’ll write a 30-60 second song about each of them. Each song will be different, and the style of music will depend on the winner. It could be acoustic, death metal, or polka. I’m not sure yet. If you’re a winner, I’ll probably contact you after the contest ends and work something out to get the details of your life story. Or, I’ll just make random speculations about you, and title your song something like, “Jimmy Isn’t Hairy, He’s A Werewolf, Dude.” Anything is possible.

Sound like something you’re into? Of course it is. Everyone’s favorite subject is themselves, so why pass up what might be your only opportunity to have your very own theme song, painstakingly written and recorded in my bedroom? So go ahead and visit the contest page at Interpunk.com and toss your name into the hat. Come on, all the cool kids are doing it. And, as we all know, peer pressure, like, totally works.

Your Friend and Personal Songwriter,

Paul J. McGuire

Frequently Asked Questions:

Do I have to buy anything?

Nope.
 
Really?
Really.

I just have to enter my first name and email address?
Yes. P.S. I’m starting to fall asleep here. Any other questions?

Can I pre-order your new album, Invaders, directly from Interpunk.com?
Sure, but only if you want to give me a 36 hour, non-stop orgasm.

Why did X-Men Origins: Wolverine suck so badly?
I’d say it was a combination of a non-compelling story (including a pointless father-murder scene that never paid off), a watered-down version of Gambit, and the casting of Ryan Reynolds as a mouth-stitched Deadpool.

I'm out of town right now, but you can follow me anywhere in the world through senseless, 140 character messages on Twitter. Maybe you can just Tweet the lyrics you want for your song to me. Hmmm.
Listing 1-50 of 346
CrazyCourtney<3
Courtney Paige.

 
yay im so attempting to win lmao :) suh-weet.
 
Posted by CrazyCourtney<3 on Thursday, May 07, 2009 - 8:53 PM
[Reply to this
Paul McGuire Rocks

 
Yay! Good luck to you.


 
Posted by Paul McGuire Rocks on Thursday, May 07, 2009 - 10:01 PM
[Reply to this
.tiff-ay.
Tiffani Edge

 
I hope i win. Cuz that skng mentioned above, was pretty rad, i must admit! Lol. (: btw, invaders=pure awesome-ness.
 
Posted by .tiff-ay. on Thursday, May 07, 2009 - 9:04 PM
[Reply to this
Paul McGuire Rocks

 
Thanks for the kind words about Invaders, very much appreciated!
 
Posted by Paul McGuire Rocks on Thursday, May 07, 2009 - 10:02 PM
[Reply to this
Paul McGuire Rocks

 
I'm going to save the Werewolf songs for the next record, so you just might have a chance at winning. :)


 
Posted by Paul McGuire Rocks on Thursday, May 07, 2009 - 10:02 PM
[Reply to this
Gød

 
ima get that shit, brosif
 
Posted by Gød on Thursday, May 07, 2009 - 9:11 PM
[Reply to this
Paul McGuire Rocks

 
Do it, brah!


 
Posted by Paul McGuire Rocks on Thursday, May 07, 2009 - 10:03 PM
[Reply to this
dear katelyn,

 
:D<br />:D<br />:D<br />i have dreamed about having a song witten for me FOREVER! (:
 
Posted by dear katelyn, on Thursday, May 07, 2009 - 9:25 PM
[Reply to this
Simply Danielle(:

 
haha I know right!
 
Posted by Simply Danielle(: on Wednesday, May 13, 2009 - 2:12 PM
[Reply to this
Paul McGuire Rocks

 
Me too! I think I'm going to enter the contest so I can write a song about myself.

Wait...wow, how self-indulgent. Scratch that!


 
Posted by Paul McGuire Rocks on Thursday, May 07, 2009 - 10:03 PM
[Reply to this
kim•nathan,i love you♥

 
hahaha<br />definately entering ! :] <br />this is amazing ! <3
 
Posted by kim•nathan,i love you♥ on Thursday, May 07, 2009 - 9:32 PM
[Reply to this
Paul McGuire Rocks

 
Your 30 second song will be an epic about how you moved from Canada to Forks. Get ready.


 
Posted by Paul McGuire Rocks on Thursday, May 07, 2009 - 10:05 PM
[Reply to this
Katie Mae
Katrina Crum

 
So I defintiely just entered, I can't wait until June boys!!!!!!! Let's tear up the PHX!
 
Posted by Katie Mae on Thursday, May 07, 2009 - 9:39 PM
[Reply to this
Paul McGuire Rocks

 
It took me, like, a minute to figure out that PHX meant Phoenix.

I'm so stupid.

Good luck!


 
Posted by Paul McGuire Rocks on Thursday, May 07, 2009 - 10:05 PM
[Reply to this
Katrina !

 
This contest is orgasmic.
 
Posted by Katrina ! on Thursday, May 07, 2009 - 9:52 PM
[Reply to this
Paul McGuire Rocks

 
...unless you win and I write a death metal song with cookie monster vocals about you. Then, it would kinda suck.

Or maybe it would be the greatest ever? Not totally sure yet.


 
Posted by Paul McGuire Rocks on Thursday, May 07, 2009 - 10:06 PM
[Reply to this
free yourself

 
Vanna entered
:)
 
Posted by free yourself on Thursday, May 07, 2009 - 10:03 PM
[Reply to this
Steph[anie]

 
This freaking sweet! Just entered! =]
 
Posted by Steph[anie] on Thursday, May 07, 2009 - 10:15 PM
[Reply to this
→Flamer♥Flame™←

 
I hope i winnnn :] i just entered :D hehe yayyz :]
 
Posted by →Flamer♥Flame™← on Thursday, May 07, 2009 - 10:22 PM
[Reply to this
Andre

 
le gasp :o andre entered.
 
Posted by Andre on Friday, May 08, 2009 - 1:28 AM
[Reply to this
Paul McGuire Rocks

 
Good luck to you, sir!
 
Posted by Paul McGuire Rocks on Monday, May 11, 2009 - 3:06 AM
[Reply to this
Toney G. Ska!

 
Someone should submit Paul's name haha. just so he can write a song about himself.. but it won't be me.. CAUSE IMMA WIN THIS SHIZ.
 
Posted by Toney G. Ska! on Friday, May 08, 2009 - 4:17 AM
[Reply to this
Paul McGuire Rocks

 
I think I mentioned this above, but I just had a thought: I already wrote three albums worth of songs about me. It's time to give someone else a chance! Ha
 
Posted by Paul McGuire Rocks on Monday, May 11, 2009 - 3:07 AM
[Reply to this
gnat [young and insane]

 
ohhh i wanna win!! :D
 
Posted by gnat [young and insane] on Friday, May 08, 2009 - 4:58 AM
[Reply to this
heather

 
i have never heard a song with my name in it!!! that would be so cool!!!:)heather
 
Posted by heather on Friday, May 08, 2009 - 2:44 PM
[Reply to this
SkyEatsEriica.
Erica Cansler

 
"hey heather" farewell.
=D
 
Posted by SkyEatsEriica. on Wednesday, May 13, 2009 - 12:16 AM
[Reply to this
Paul McGuire Rocks

 
I'm trying to think if I know a song about a "Heather." Hmm. Didn't Paul McCartney write one for his ex-wife with the one leg? Her name was Heather. I must look into this.


 
Posted by Paul McGuire Rocks on Monday, May 11, 2009 - 3:08 AM
[Reply to this
H a n n a h I s ?
Hannah Bananas

 
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!i so love u guys :3
 
Posted by H a n n a h I s ? on Friday, May 08, 2009 - 9:23 PM
[Reply to this
Paul McGuire Rocks

 
Does that mean you entered?

:)


 
Posted by Paul McGuire Rocks on Monday, May 11, 2009 - 3:08 AM
[Reply to this
Desi D.struction™

 
khs :)<33
 
Posted by Desi D.struction™ on Saturday, May 09, 2009 - 3:49 AM
[Reply to this
Paul McGuire Rocks

 
Desi Destruction.

:)


 
Posted by Paul McGuire Rocks on Monday, May 11, 2009 - 3:08 AM
[Reply to this
Korina.throws.babies™
Marjory Stewart-Baxter

 
I totally want to win, that'd be BEYOND gnarly dude, especially coming from such a gnarly band
 
Posted by Korina.throws.babies™ on Saturday, May 09, 2009 - 5:06 AM
[Reply to this
Paul McGuire Rocks

 
If you win, I'm writing your song specifically about your inclination to throw babies. Can't wait.


 
Posted by Paul McGuire Rocks on Monday, May 11, 2009 - 3:09 AM
[Reply to this
Kiley Scream

 
Fucking ayeeee;I'm entering ASAP!

Paul;I love you guys(:
 
Posted by Kiley Scream on Saturday, May 09, 2009 - 3:26 PM
[Reply to this
Paul McGuire Rocks

 
Yay!


 
Posted by Paul McGuire Rocks on Monday, May 11, 2009 - 3:10 AM
[Reply to this
Rachel Shalom

 
This contest gives me a 37 hour, non-stop orgasm.
 
Posted by Rachel Shalom on Sunday, May 10, 2009 - 12:48 AM
[Reply to this
Paul McGuire Rocks

 
I hope you win, if only so I can write a song about Panda Dogs.


 
Posted by Paul McGuire Rocks on Monday, May 11, 2009 - 3:11 AM
[Reply to this
[STAN-LEE]

 
Well i live in Australia....that means the song could be about you AUSSIE best bud
 
Posted by [STAN-LEE] on Sunday, May 10, 2009 - 9:41 AM
[Reply to this
Paul McGuire Rocks

 
When I visit Australia, I'm staying with you. Deal with it.


 
Posted by Paul McGuire Rocks on Monday, May 11, 2009 - 3:12 AM
[Reply to this
[STAN-LEE]

 
its a deal.... im getting the shrimp ready now!
 
Posted by [STAN-LEE] on Tuesday, May 12, 2009 - 7:49 AM
[Reply to this
FluoChomps_

 
I'm from Italy and I love you, do you remember me? Fuck, I wanna win.
 
Posted by FluoChomps_ on Sunday, May 10, 2009 - 11:46 PM
[Reply to this
Paul McGuire Rocks

 
Of course! I want to write a song in Italian. If I write it in English, can you translate it for me?


 
Posted by Paul McGuire Rocks on Monday, May 11, 2009 - 3:12 AM
[Reply to this
FluoChomps_

 
Awww ♥ Of course I can!
 
Posted by FluoChomps_ on Monday, May 11, 2009 - 6:02 PM
[Reply to this
Tyler *T.R.O.H.*

 
hey, r u guys ganna get some new merch?
 
Posted by Tyler *T.R.O.H.* on Monday, May 11, 2009 - 12:15 AM
[Reply to this
Paul McGuire Rocks

 
Yes. Also, we always have new merch on the road with us that isn't sold on our web store. I guess what I'm saying is: see you soon? :)


 
Posted by Paul McGuire Rocks on Monday, May 11, 2009 - 3:13 AM
[Reply to this
Tyler *T.R.O.H.*

 
lol, hopefully
 
Posted by Tyler *T.R.O.H.* on Tuesday, May 12, 2009 - 7:34 PM
[Reply to this
ekajo

 
this contest sounds pretty sick.
i hope im one of those three victoriesXD
i would be preettyy flabbergasted.
oh and that remix is stunning by the way
=]
 
Posted by ekajo on Monday, May 11, 2009 - 12:32 AM
[Reply to this
Paul McGuire Rocks

 
Glad you like the remix! So goofy. :)


 
Posted by Paul McGuire Rocks on Monday, May 11, 2009 - 3:13 AM
[Reply to this
B[♥]NAP
Brittany N

 
can i write a song with you guys?
 
Posted by B[♥]NAP on Monday, May 11, 2009 - 1:20 AM
[Reply to this
Paul McGuire Rocks

 
Only if you want to be relentlessly bashed by 13 year old kids from Texas that think y0U t0TaLlY sUcKz0RzZz, dUd3!!!!11111oneone

Still in?


 
Posted by Paul McGuire Rocks on Monday, May 11, 2009 - 3:16 AM
[Reply to this
Listing 1-50 of 346