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Stan Dubin

Stan Dubin


Last Updated: 7/9/2009

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Gender: Male
Status: Married
Age: 57
Sign: Cancer

City: CLEARWATER
State: Florida
Country: US
Signup Date: 2/18/2007

Who Gives Kudos:


Monday, May 14, 2007 

Category: Sports
The following is an article I wrote a few years ago that was published in the sports section of The Tampa Tribune. After reading it recently, I realized it applies outside of the sports world...


Fans express themselves in two very basic ways. One is to support a winner and the other is to CREATE a winner.

Many fans will come out and support a winner. They'll cheer madly, they'll proudly wear the team merchandise, and they'll boast to out-of-town friends about how great their team is.

But what happens if the team performs poorly? What if the team performs poorly over a long stretch of time? Some of these supportive fans now become not so supportive. You start to hear boos. They call in to talk shows complaining about the players, the coaches, the strategies, the playing styles. Some complain with incredible vehemence.

Now let's turn to the fan who is intent on CREATING a winner. This fan does not boo the home team. Interview any professional player and they will tell you there is nothing gained when their own fans boo them. Many will tell you that it actually undermines them, as they often count on the "home team fan" to be the extra player. Home team advantage is not a mere theory … it is a statistical fact. But the home team advantage erodes when more and more "fans" boo their own players.

Each and every fan has a part in creating a winning team. That may sound farfetched, but just as each member of a family or each member of a group contributes to the survival of that family or group, so it is with fans and their local team.

Creating a winner. What does that mean? Let's take an example from everyday life. Let's say you're a salesperson and you've just put a tremendous amount of effort into closing an important deal for the company. Closing it means that you'll get a excellent commission and your company will have a ton of business to deliver over the next 6 months. But something goes wrong and the sale doesn't close. You come back to the office and your boss meets you at the door and says: "You crummy piece of dirt! I can't believe you didn't close that sale!" You walk down the corridor and an associate sees you and yells: "Thanks for nothing!" The rest of the day goes pretty much like that.

Now, I'm sure there are a handful of people on this planet who just love to be criticized and they do their best work when people spit on them, but my observation is that people perform best in a different type of environment. The more positive and the more encouraging people are around you, the better you do. People just accomplish more when that's what others around them are intending them to do!

That last line is very important. When people around you are intending for you to succeed, your likelihood of success increases. When people shift from supporting you to criticizing you, you are less likely to succeed.

Does a fan have the right to boo? Of course. And I guess your associates have a right to make your life miserable if you don't get something done well at the office. But you certainly appreciate it an awful lot more if your associates show you some understanding and then keep right on intending that you're going to get the job done right.

Should a fan keep completely silent and never voice his displeasure with a team that is under-performing? No and yes. There are different ways and different forums for that. But when your team is in the heat of battle and they don't complete a first down or get a key basket or goal, that is the last place to voice it.

When the players sense, really sense, that the fans are really, really behind them, the majority of players will up their intensity level and play like crazy to win.

Yes, we have other factors permeating professional sports these days: money, free agency, unions, strikes—all of these contribute to a scene that can make the "old days" seem a long, long time ago.

And if the home team has very little talent or if the team owner doesn't really care if his team wins or loses as long as he makes a profit, then the prospects for success are dramatically affected.

But this article is simply about how you can play a part in creating a winner. You can support the home team when it wins or you can help create the home team into a winner. As a fan, you make a big difference.
Virginia
Virginia MacGregor

 
This is beautiful, Stan. Thanks. So true. Nothing to be gained from invalidation. You only make enemies and break the team down.

I validated someone recently for being nominated for an award, and they twisted what I'd said and invalidated me. I poured over what I'd written, and tried to see how I could've come off in any way that would warrant that.

I figured the person must have been in that covertly hostile tone they accused me of, and looked at it from that viewpoint. I rewrote the validation picking it apart and shedding more light on what was said, and why. (It was written with real pride toward the person in the first place) I haven't heard anything back, but your message above really hit home on more than one flow. I was in no small way responsible for the successes the person had, and was genuinely proud of their accomplishments.

I am also aware of some not-so-stellar ethics on their part, but ignored that and focused on the positive. I understood how they could have come to that conclusion, looking from that tone.
I didn't expect a response, and of course I haven't gotten one. But I know taking responsibility for both sides ultimately wins every time. I'm part of a team, and whether one of them does what we'd like or not, supporting them and creating them always wins in the long-term.
 
Posted by Virginia on Monday, July 23, 2007 - 9:54 PM
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Stan Dubin
Stan Dubin

 
Hi Viriginia,

I didn't realize I could reply to these comments (you made yours way back!)

What you say makes very good sense. Sometimes we try to validate others and no matter how we do it, it doesn't quite get duplicated as such.

And the concept of validation is too little respected in this world. Most of what you see in the media is inval or a tearing down: "look what this person did wrong," "look at what this politician did wrong," "look at what this company did wrong."

And you are so right about the long term benefits of supporting and creating your team!
 
Posted by Stan Dubin on Monday, April 28, 2008 - 10:40 PM
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Ken
Ken Roland

 
Those are really wise words. I realize that I dont validate people enough, I dont critize them either. But I need to really be a home team fan of my friends and faimly, and encourge them as much as I can.


Thanks
Ken
 
Posted by Ken on Wednesday, April 23, 2008 - 6:23 AM
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Stan Dubin
Stan Dubin

 
Thanks, Ken!

Yes, I found that criticism, even when it's correct criticism, is sometimes inappropriate and harmful. Especially with family.
 
Posted by Stan Dubin on Monday, April 28, 2008 - 10:42 PM
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