I'm basically a nice guy. My childhood was ruled by two wonderful, headstrong women who unfortunately fought about everything. So I blame them for growing up a non-confrontational, fence-sitting, nice guy. But this Libran is getting annoyed about something and he's about to take it out on YOU, my dear Myspace friend!
Apparently I need "exposure". After all, I'm a musician who hangs out in the mall. Must be desperate for a decent gig, right? The point that I get all the exposure I need, and make a reasonable living doing this seems to go right over a lot of people's heads. The truth is that I stopped worrying about so called "success" and "exposure" many years ago. A while back I decided to just do what I wanted to do: Play my own music and make a living doing it. That's all I wanted then, and it still is. I play instrumental music with no commercial aspirations. Yes, I enjoy an attentive audience, and I'd love to sell enough albums to take a few months off every year, which is why I work hard, keep my Myspace profile updated and send applications out to festivals.
But seriously, my commercial music use-by-date ran out around 1994. Come on, I'm proudly Gen-X (on the cusp of Baby Boomerism, actually!) and old enough to be the father of university graduates, but I started late in that department. The fact that I listen to alternative radio and hate suits has nothing to do with age, trust me. I was flattered to be called "your friend's hot uncle" in the recent Merge street mag, because it's marginally better than "hot grandpa"! And I did the whole "band thing" many times, years ago. "Yeah, we're going to be huge, man". It was fun!
Anyway...Because some people think I NEED exposure, CRAVE exposure, I sometimes get offered the great honour to play for NOTHING (kids these days call it the Sweet FA, if I'm correct). The first event that comes to mind was a certain charity. Got an email asking "would you like to come and busk at our big day?" There were assurances of huge crowds and nice shady spots, but when I got there I found that they could care less. I was just another "something" to make the event seem important. After being issued a spot in the sun with music from another stage blasting me, I snuck out - unnoticed. Luckily, this is not typical of charities. Most of them are very grateful for any help.
The next one was a wedding back in February. Now, I play a lot of weddings, and people are generally happy to pay for a decent act at "the most important day of their lives". I've had battlers pay me $500 to play at their special day, I'm still cheap by comparison. Anyway, this dashing couple approached me in Rundle Mall and asked me to play at their wedding with very short notice. A small sum was discussed briefly on the phone, and I will admit that the agreement was very rushed. I showed up on time, dressed nicely, did my thing, got plenty of praise from guests, and left without even a THANK YOU from the happy couple. Let me add that this was one of the most lavish and expensive weddings I've played at. Apparently these people thought they had done me a great favour by "allowing" me to play at their big Greek wedding because I'm obviously a starving street muso..? I let it slide, but I shouldn't have (it's part of my personality disorder). Would you call a plumber to your house and not expect to pay? Come on guys, at least stop by and have the decency to say thanks the next time you see me. Screw the money.
Finally, today I was approached by a well-known Australian musician in the street. He told me he was playing at one of Adelaide's major venues, and would I like to come and perform in the foyer before the show? I thought about it, and although alarm bells were ringing, that little voice inside my head said "this could be worth doing". WTF is it with us humans and thinking that hanging around someone half-famous is going to make us somehow more "valuable"?! Well, I went anyway, and I have to say honestly that I did it because I told the guy I would - not because I really thought it would be an exciting opportunity. And I was right, it was a waste of time (thanks for not bothering to tell the door staff, or the FOH manager!). However, it was probably a genuine attempt to "help" a fellow muso, and I respect that. Only next time, maybe give a bit more consideration about someone giving up their family dinner to play for nothing in a lobby.
In all of these instances, a "thanks" or any other simple form of acknowledgment would have made a difference. These people all assumed that they could get me to do something for nothing. And the sad truth is that they were right. So this is clearly my problem as much as anyone else's - I accept that.
People who value what you do will remember to show it, even if they're very busy (or famous). Like the WOMAD performer who took my card and texted me with an offer for free tickets, because he enjoyed our chat and my playing. Or the Adelaide Festival Centre who actually stuck their necks out and booked a mere busker to play at a major festival. And the dozens of regular Aussie blokes and ladies at whose weddings and parties I've been offered a nice plate of food and a drink, even though all they really had to do was pay me.
Everyone: Don't take people for granted. Don't assume that you're doing them a favour - show some gratitude and a bit of respect.
Good night.
Andy