I was already planning on blogging this evening, if only to talk tunes and to wax philosophical on "Naissance". However, I'll be switching gears tonight. It seems the term "Emotional Roller Coaster" was created for days such as these.

As many of you may already know, on May 11 of this year, we lost a dear friend. Upon Mario's passing, we ached to be with his friends and family. Yet due to geographical circumstances, only our spiritual presence was permitted at his service. Today, a month and a half later, we returned to LA determined to visit Mario and pay our respects. The inscription bearing the name "Mario Roberto Sanchez" on the headstone made the once unfathomable nightmare a now depressing truth. My friend is gone.

I can't wait to see you again, Mario, so I can give you those guitar lessons I promised you. So you and I can joke about Bernard. Gwa-gwa!

To make things a bit rougher, I hurt someone very dear to me today. A bit of perspective: If there were a list of every soul on Earth who deserved to be wronged (say, Adolf as #1 and Gandhi at #800 gazillion), this person STILL wouldn't make the list. Yet I managed to do it. Today, "sorry" is a band-aid on a gaping wound that may never heal. And I have cursed myself as the one who would look upon the ugly scar as my own doing. As one who once vowed to live life with no regrets, I sit here burdened with the weight of this one.

As the lids of my eyes grow heavy on the day of twists and turns, I pray that when I wake tomorrow…this ride will have ended.

And that you remember: through the thick fog of my flaws, I LOVE YOU.