My head is filled with questions.

How do Transformers reproduce? Do they just build more? Are they born with free will, or are they born Autobots and Decepticons?

Who greenlit the movie Corky Romano? Do they feel guilty about it?

Why can't Stormtroopers shoot straight? Was marksmanship not taught at the Imperial Millitary Academy, or do their helmets impede their vision?

Why, exactly, does Rick Dalton hate dogs so much? ("Because he's a cat person" is an unacceptable answer.)

What happened to the lead singer from Creed? Did he die? (I sure hope so.)

Who many licks does it actually take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop?

Does Chewbacca wipe like a man or scoot like a dog, and how does he deal with dingleberries?

How does one go about pitying a fool?

Could Uwe Boll make a movie so bad even he wouldn't watch it?

When did professional wrestling lose it's dignity?

What in the hell does "Git-R-Done" mean, anyway?

Have you never been mellow?

How can the US Government expect to catch Osama Bin Laden if they couldn't catch The A-Team? For that matter, how long would it take The A-Team to find Bin Laden if it were up to them?

Why do good things happen to bad people?

Have you seen Jesco the Dancing Outlaw?

What the fuck is "Alternative" music? Alternative to what?

Won't you take me to Funkytown?

If anyone has answers, I sure could use 'em.