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Big Girl Pride

Big Girl Pride

Big Girl Pride


Last Updated: 5/21/2009

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Wednesday, May 07, 2008 

Current mood:  adored
Category: Blogging



For the last nine years, the arrival of April has meant one thing—the Listen Up Spoken Word Event at Mills College Upward Bound. I discovered Upward Bound when a classmate in my Creative Writing graduate program invited me to come meet these amazing teens who were doing a Saturday writing workshop in preparation for their poetry reading. If you don't know Upward Bound (NOT Outward Bound! That's the one where kids experience nature adventures to teach them their inner strength), it's a Department of Ed program that helps low-income teens become the first in their families to pursue four-year college degrees. My Upward Bound serves the troubled Oakland, California school district, and my first writing workshop with them eventually led to years as a college counselor/teacher/tech chick/jill-of-all-trades for the program.  

That first year, I joined the program as a workshop participant, and I joined the Upward Bound students for their annual reading. The next year, I took over the coordination of the workshops and the planning of the event. I've performed there every year since then. I often do poems about the fat girl experience, in part because it's a huge (no pun intended) part of who I am and in part because I know young women need positive role models in the form of adult females who will openly talk about body image.

The 10th Anniversary of Listen Up was celebrated last week! (If you're interested in supporting youth poetry, check it out at http://www.myspace.com/millslistenup). I introduced my poem like this:

Every few years at Listen Up I do a fat girl poem, and every time I do, I ask myself, "Am I really going to do another fat girl poem?" and then I say, "Well, uh, I'm still a fat girl. So, YES!" Before I read my poem tonight, I'm gonna ask you to do something. I do a lot of fat activism and awareness raising, and one of the things that really inspires me is a quote I read in a magazine a few years ago. I don't remember who said it…I think it might have been Camryn Manheim or maybe this plus-size model, Emme…I don't know, one of those media friendly fat girls. Anyway, she said something like, "We're never gonna know what a sexy 250 pound woman looks like because no woman who weighs 250 pounds will ever admit it." Now, I'm right in that 250 pound ballmark…

At this point I stepped away from the podium and, accompanied by thunderous applause (if I do say so myself) spun in a circle so my entire 240-something pounds could be seen from all angles.

So you can determine for yourselves is you've seen a sexy 250-pound woman. Now, I want to invite all of you to do something with me, those of you who are brave enough. I'm going to count to three, and I want you to stand up and shout out your weight. Yes, I'm serious. Whoever is brave enough. Yes, I'm looking at some of your specifically. C'mon now…one…two…three!

And at least 1/3 of the people in the audience did it! Especially the fat girls! Yay!!!

And then I gave them a round of applause, because any woman (or man, for that matter) who will stand up in a room full of strangers (at least half of whom are high school students…not the most tolerant group on the planet) and shout out their weight DESERVES a round of applause! Blog readers, feel free to do the e-equivalent by including your weight, loud and proud, in any comments you happen to post! J

 

So, here's the poem. As I told the audience, it's still untitled but for now I'll just call it…

 
That Other Fat Girl Poem

 
Everybody knows a fat girl who sits at home
Feeling so sorry and wrong
But not everybody knows a fat girl who rocks it
So here is that fat girl's song

I've got rolls and rolls and rolls
And I don't give a damn
Cuz lots of folks wanna squeeze these rolls
And love me the way I am

If somebody don't like this big girl body
I don't have to waste my time
I know I outweigh all these video girls
There's more curves in a dollar than in a dime

No disrespect to thin girls, I love my skinny sistas
Because every woman's a prize
But I can be just as hot as that skinny girl is
I'm just hot in a bigger size

So all my curvy cuties just hold your head high
Don't let fat-hating fools cramp your style
Besides, you have fewer chins when you keep your head up
And we all look more cute when we smile

So what if you weigh what a ball player benches
Strut your stuff with your lumps and your rolls
Let your life be judged by successes and laughter and love
And not by the size of your clothes.

 

 

 

 

DJ Zulu The VIDEO King!

 
WORD!
 
Posted by DJ Zulu The VIDEO King! on Wednesday, May 07, 2008 - 3:46 AM
[Reply to this
Stefania

 
"There's more curves in a dollar than in a dime"

I luv that line!

I wish I could've made it out there to see you perform....sounds like you had a wonderful time!

182!
 
Posted by Stefania on Wednesday, May 07, 2008 - 4:06 AM
[Reply to this
SO FULL OF SURPRISES!!
LAcy Binafegha

 
278!!!!!!!!!! And @ 5feet tall I'm loving all of me... I appreciate those words... I'm 23 but sometimes I feel like the 12yr old fat girl looking for a fat woman to show me how sexxxy isn't a number! Thanx
 
Posted by SO FULL OF SURPRISES!! on Wednesday, May 07, 2008 - 4:50 AM
[Reply to this
The Walking Scandal

 
200? 225?

I don't do scales due to a little obsessive thing back in college.

What number represents better than ever? What number represents no longer worried about men's opinion of me? What number represents, "Too late. If you didn't care about me when I was larger, I'm not giving you a chance now"?

What number represents, "I love this poem!"? That's my number.

(And good for you for serving as a great role model and mentor.)
 
Posted by The Walking Scandal on Wednesday, May 07, 2008 - 6:21 PM
[Reply to this
Ms. Sanchez™ (RED): Living la dolce vita!

 
You are such an inspiration! Thank you for the work that you do, particularly with one girls. I wrote an article on this very topic last year.... check it out!
http://www.divinecaroline.com/article/24133/40540-tell-don-t-yourself----
I applaud YOU for your work, for your heart and for being YOU!
-M
 
Posted by Ms. Sanchez™ (RED): Living la dolce vita! on Thursday, May 08, 2008 - 3:23 PM
[Reply to this
Ms. Sanchez™ (RED): Living la dolce vita!

 
Oppps, I almost forgot... 185lbs. baby!
 
Posted by Ms. Sanchez™ (RED): Living la dolce vita! on Thursday, May 08, 2008 - 3:23 PM
[Reply to this
DIAMOND DIVA - THE TRUE BOSS LADY - FIRST LADY
Diamond Diva

 
That was awesome! I have not been on a scale in months! LOL! I hope it's okay to shout my dress size 18/20!
 
Posted by DIAMOND DIVA - THE TRUE BOSS LADY - FIRST LADY on Friday, May 09, 2008 - 4:27 AM
[Reply to this
Big Girl Pride
Big Girl Pride

 
Actually, I should say to everyone here that I only know my weight from the last time I went to the doctor (and guessing a few extra pounds based on clothing size and fit). I don't keep a scale in my home because it's not healthy for me (and I don't think it's healthy for very many people, actually).
 
Posted by Big Girl Pride on Friday, May 09, 2008 - 3:32 PM
[Reply to this
Plus Size Princess

 
BRAVO!! Can I reprint that on my page and give you full credit of course??? I loooved it and I always enjoy your blogs. My hats off to you my plus sized sister. Are you familiar with Queen Raqui?? She has a similar poem that I cried when I heard her recite it. It is called " I am Plus Sized Beauty". You can find it on youtube. My bf even applauded it. Thanks for sharing your terrific poem.:)
 
Posted by Plus Size Princess on Friday, May 09, 2008 - 6:17 PM
[Reply to this
Big Girl Pride
Big Girl Pride

 
Absolutely! For the record, anyone at any time may reprint anything I post here as long as I get credit (and ideally a link to the page, but that's not as important to me).
 
Posted by Big Girl Pride on Friday, May 16, 2008 - 1:42 AM
[Reply to this
Jennafur
Jennafur Parks

 
336 here!
 
Posted by Jennafur on Saturday, May 10, 2008 - 3:41 PM
[Reply to this
Russell
Russell Wetanson

 
You impress me every day and make me proud to be your friend, even if I weigh only 160 pounds!
 
Posted by Russell on Monday, May 12, 2008 - 11:07 PM
[Reply to this
betsey

 
I absolutely LOVE the poem!
Thank you for being one of the role models I never had!

5 foot 3 at 200lbs!!
Curvy and loving it!!
 
Posted by betsey on Thursday, July 10, 2008 - 10:55 PM
[Reply to this