she grabbed every pair of underwear from the top draw
every piece of clothing she saw
and threw it haphazardly into a small black ripped up gym bag
placed it by the edge of the front door
and with tears in her eyes she looked up at me and said
"i cant do it anymore scott.
theres something going on inside of you
and i cant seem to break through"

there was so much that i wanted to
say right there
so much that i had to share
but i just looked at her
with this cold
blank
stare

i walk back to the bedroom and i lock the door
and i
i stand there in the middle of the floor looking around the room
hoping to find even the tiniest little thing she mightve left behind
id do this even when we werent fighting and she would just be leaving for work
and id always find something
something simple but
there was nothing

not the black hooded sweatshirt on the wooden coat-rack
not the earring studs she would leave everywhere
not the necklace she would keep laid out on the counter but never wear
....nothing

i used to be able to talk to you walls
in exchange for late night family calls
id turn to you like diaries but not tonight
it
seems you've been agreeing with her more with every fight

why?
why have you turned against me walls?
is this some sort of plan?
is this your way of making me a stronger man?
SPEAK UP
SAY SOMETHING
TELL ME WHAT IM SUPPOSED TO DO CAUSE I DONT...
I DONT....

know

i love her, walls
i do
but everytime shes here she senses you
these thick structures that shes trying to break through
and she feels like shes not succeeding and its hurting her
i understand her leaving
but i know in my heart that i love her
and though she may not feel it yet
in her attempts to break through
she never fails
cause as i look around this room
i see pictures of us that were hung up
by hammer
and nails