So its been almost a month since Dallas's accident, and i have pretty much been in denial 90 percent of the time. Out of sight out of mind right? i know its a HORRIBLE way of putting it but its whats been getting me through and past the sadness... i only cried when i first heard and a lil bit at the memorial other then that i just dont believe it..... well last night i came across the SL dvd i never have really watched it since gscott gave it to me like last february, and i sat and debated for about 20 minutes.... do u really want to see this? is it for the best?  i miss him sooo flippin much and to just see a glimpse of him again i thought i must.... i watched the first song they performed and lost it.... finally let it come out .... i then became too sad to watch it any further so i pressed stop and sat there.... i PRESSED STOP and the screen went to the toshiba dvd logo right... sat trying to bring myself together the movie starts playing again....so im a lil freaked out i press stop again... it does it again! so im like okay so i change the input to go to regular tv.... and i can hear the noise from the dvd still so i turn off the tv... the tv flashes once AFTER i turned it off then finally went off..... so i run upstairs like WHAT THE HECK?  and my computer is playing bright spring morning.... so i came to this conclusion.... call me crazy...but i beileve something or someone is telling me its okay to cry.... tears mean he hasnt been forgotten and i shouldnt forget him i should think about him everyday and be greatful for every moment we spent together from disneyland trips.... to just hanging out eating carls jr late at night at the house...while playing video games... so no ive decided no longer to forget but to wear it on my sleeve and theres no shame in crying... i love u dallas and i hope u know i miss u so very much