We've finally reached the end of our European tour with Bonded By Blood and Sworn Amongst, which took in 34 shows in 11 countries, 40,000 miles on the clock in a tourbus with 18 people aboard, chugging through something like 180 litres of diesel over the course of five weeks and five days.
Along the way there were torn ligaments, damaged vocal chords, a suspected broken ass bone, about 12 cases of the common cold, a few outbreaks of alcohol poisoning and more bruises, cuts, scrapes and mysterious injuries than we care to count.
We played in two haunted clubs, complete with a ghost that didn't want us to use the shower, a former Greek restaurant with murals of the Parthenon, a biker-controlled backstreet bar, a black metal meeting house, a classic car workshop, a converted slaughterhouse, dockside pubs, a couple of youth clubs, drug dens, shit holes and palaces too.
We're not clear on how many guitar strings we used, but it pales in comparison to the amount of beers we drank. Also, we have no idea how many people we played to, but it was excellent all the same, as we're starting to meet people who wear our shirts to the show. Nice.
Our shows in Rome, Slovenia, London, Lisbon and Madrid stick in our memories best, but each and every gig had something to really enjoy about it and we met really cool people every night.
We drank the following beers, and several more we can't remember: Super Bock, Duvel, Jupiler, Falcon, Heineken, Amstel, some kind of 'value' beer, Stella and Guinness (not advisable in Belgium).
The tour was also sponsored by Jack Daniel's, Captain Morgan's Rum, Jameson Whiskey and other miscellaneous rot gut.
The Stamp Out Inferior Metal Campaign also reached its climax with the London show, where we stomped, smashed and scraped our way through some of the world's worst music onstage. That was fun.
We'd like to thank Bonded By Blood and Sworn Amongst for keeping us off the straight and narrow, our tour manager Martin for being a rock legend and everyone came out, wherever they were, to thrash with us and hang out.
We'll be back in Europe in early 2009, see you then. We're off to bed for a month.

GAMA BOMB - Faster Is Gooder