WELL, I FINISHED THE HEROIN DIARIES TODAY.

WOW...POWERFULL STUFF.

I LAUGHED, I CRIED, AND MOST OF ALL I REMEMBERED.

I REMEMBERED THE FEELING OF HATING BEING STRUNG OUT AND NOT BEING ABLE TO STOP. I REMEMBERED THE LOVE AFFAIR THAT WAS KILLING ME. I REMEMBERED MY GOING FROM 162 POUNDS TO 100 IN A MONTHS TIME. I REMEMBERED PRAYING BEFORE EVERY SHOT THAT THIS WOULD NOT BE THE ONE THAT KILLS ME. I REMEMBERED HOPING THAT IT WOULD BE THE ONE THAT KILLED ME. I REMEMBERED THE DEATH OF FRIENDS AND THE LOSS OF LOVED ONES THAT DROVE ME TO THE DOPE IN THE FIRST PLACE. MOST OF ALL...I REMEMBERED MY INSIDES SCREAMING AND THE VOICES IN MY HEAD. NIKKI HAD MIDGETS AND MEXICANS HIDING IN THE BUSHES WAITING TO GET HIM..I HAD BUSHNARCS...

AT THIS TIME IN MY LIFE, I THOUGHT I HAD MY SHIT TOGETHER BUT WHEN THINGS HAVE BEEN  BAD RECENTLY, I FOUND MYSELF WISHING I COULD JUST SAY FUCK IT ALL AND GET HIGH....AND THEN...THANKS TO NIKKI...I REMEMBERED...

THANK YOU NIKKI...GOD BLESS YOU...