Well a lot of people have sent me many messages about the last blog I posted. Saying how it touched them or that they could really relate. However, some of the messages wanted to know exactly what it was all about. At first I didn't want to say, since it represents many aspects of my life but I figured if I did explain it then maybe it could help other people that read it relate even more.

The blog basically details my struggle to to fully embrace manhood. Wanting to be more of a man than my real dad could ever be. The adolescent fears represent the fear of thinking that I'm destined to grow into what he was. It's also about something very simple: When I was growing up a lot of my friends had those role models to guide them. They had dads who would take them to games and bond with them and I really didn't have that until later in life. Hence, the whole aspect of feeling like I was on the "outside looking in". If anything it represents how it still feels like that as I try to shape myself as a man because I'm afraid that since I didn't have a solid example when growing up that I'll never truly understand what it's like to step up and be a man.

It's about sometimes hiding behind walls trying to put on the front that I have everything together when sometimes I'm just as lost as the next person, just trying to find my way.

However, it also says just because I'm going through these growing pains doesn't mean I don't appreciate what I have in front of me. I know there is a lot to celebrate in this life and that's what gets me through. That's what makes me feel confident that I will figure it all out.



It also represents how I won't allow those influences to bring me down and make me miserable. I won't let "them" meaning any negative outlooks on life, let me sink

Hope people get something out of this and thanks for your messages about it. Means a lot

G