Kathy Patrick's Pulpwood Queens Deserve Their Crowns

Hidden (though less so these days) in East Texas is the quaint, ghost-laden town of Jefferson. For this scribe, author of Deadly Exchange, I ventured there for a three-day book event known as the Pulpwood Queen's Girlfriend Weekend. Little did I know what was in store—pure, unadulterated fun. It was a time warp experience, akin to The Rocky Horror Picture Show, except to benefit literacy.

The ever-energetic author of The Pulpwood Queens' Tiara-Wearing, Book-Sharing Guide to LifeKathy Patrick, began her book club, which celebrates literacy for all. Now, the Queens have spread throughout North America with new book club chapters cropping up left and right.

This year, some thirty authors attended with the caliber of (Whale Season)N.M. Kelby, (Keeping This House)Ellen Baker, (Trail of Crumbs)Kim Sunee, and (Hick)andrea portes, among many others.

Along with (My Soul To Keep)Melanie Wells, I was one of two thriller writers. Most of the other books (superbly written) feature wonderful, quirky characters that populate small southern town-life.

The big celebrity of the event was former Czech supermodel, Paulina Porizkova. Her first novel, A Model SummerPaulina Porizkova, draws upon her past career and offers a rare glimpse into the treacherous world of high fashion through the eyes of a fifteen year-old protagonist. Wonderfully written, it ends the commonly held belief that women like Paulina are all beauty and no brains. In fact, I was fortunate to share many scintillating conversations and meals with Paulina, her friend and soon-to-be-author, Lorna Graham, and our intrepid Jefferson companion, Bill Smith.

To her credit, Paulina catered to all the photo requests and attention by admirers with all the grace one would expect, and none of the attitude that some celebs display. Perhaps such groundedness is due to the stability of her 23-year marriage to Ric Ocasek, of the Cars. However, she would probably say it also stemmed from being an avid reader.

As Kathy Patrick does every year, the head queen guided everyone to varying states of euphoria. Love and adoration blossomed throughout the weekend, despite a poor showing by the media and lower then usual attendance numbers.

The pinnacle of the East Texas experience was the "Ball of Hair" (formerly the "HairBall", but someone had staked a trademark claim on that). The theme for this event was "Hairspray" (1962), which meant costumes, glitter, and extravaganza galore. The gala offered fantastic music by The Moon and the Starz, featuring Richard Bowden (of Linda Ronstadt fame). Awards were given to the best theme-dressed/styled Queens and to one guy, who danced his way to the front in wild attire.

I'm deliciously happy to say that the Queens honored this writer with the coveted Timber Guy 2008 trophy for my imitation of a buck-toothed brother of Buddy Holly. Words alone cannot express the depth of my gratitude and love to all those in attendance, especially those spectacular Queens—true royalty.

For pictures:Geoffrey Gluckman,Kathy Patrick, or visit me on MySpace.