I told my one friend how much I hated my keyboard and he found it very funny. So here it is.

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The problem with my typing is that I can sort of touch type, but not completely, so I'm not always looking at the screen and I don't always know what I'm doing. I know when I've made a mistake and I instantly hit the "backspace" key so I can carry on. The problem is I have one of those girly backspace keys…it is so very small. It's the same size as all the other letter keys and it pisses me off. I'm used to using those BIG robust backspace keys that just scream "push me, bitch!!!" to add to the problem my "=-+" and

 "..-|" key is right next to the backspace key. So I usually miss backspace and hit "=" or ".." so I will look up at the screen and see something like this: "today ie=.. w..mt to the parkto.. to scare all thee= small ch=ilden" what the hell???

My next issue is the "Enter" key. That nice, fat, backwards "L" shape sitting there taking up a whole lot of space and easy to use. Not for me. My "Enter" key is the same size as my "Shift key" I almost never hit it and land up with a lot of "]" everywhere.

Now, I've had this keyboard for a while, and the "L", "D" and "K" keys are all faded out. Not the "Delete" key, it's still there, not a combination of "XSE" or "ONPR" or "DNEU" or " HPRLCINDO" or any of the other key combo's I'm used to pushing. I don't understand this keyboard.

The space bar:  If there has ever been a good role model in life it would have to be the Space Bar. IT'S HUGE!!1 it's the width of about six keys!!! Shift - 3 keys, backspace – 2/3 keys, Caps Lock – 1.5 keys, Tab – 1.5 keys, Enter – 5 keys (ish) AND THEN THERE IS THE SPACE BAR!!! It makes me proud every single time I push it, it dominates over all the other keys… Screaming: "RESPECT ME MOTHER FUCKER!!!" and it worked on me. I have a framed picture of my space bar next to my bead. (Just joking)

They can shorten my backspace key, they can shrink my Enter Key, but I will be god-dammed before they takeaway my Space Bar…

I forget who it was that said this story was so funny… probably my dad. Oh well, if I told you this and you found it funny, this is dedicated to you.