So, yeah...Moscow.
I actually had a really good time. I didn't know what to expect so I just kept an open mind (the best thing to do, I think, when travelling anywhere). I knew people who think Russia is still all damp cinderblock walls and naked lightbulbs swinging from the ceiling like a giant Slavic film noir, but it isn't - not even close. The reality? There's a snooty big name designer mall IN red square. In Moscow and need some jeans that are marked up 300% just coz a famous name is on 'em? No problem. Hop on the Metro, check out Lenin's tomb, see St. Basil's, then go to GUM ( G.U.M. - stands for Gosudarstvenny Universalny Magazin. I knew you were dyin' to know that.). Speaking of St. Basil's - it's smaller than I thought it would be. Not that it's teeny; but I'd imagined this huge edifice. It's just mid-sized; not a Suburban, not a Mini - maybe a Nissan Sentra......with a wild paint job ( I'm not kidding. Check my pics).

Here's what really blew my mind: old stuff, no REALLY old stuff. In Los Angeles, old is "built in 1920", REALLY old is 200 years old built of crumbling adobe. Walking casually past, around and IN stuff that's 2 centuries old - or 3 - or 4 (!!!) and stunningly beautiful; I almost couldn't even wrap my mind around THAT. Yeah...buildings that are TWICE as old as our little upstart country....and we have the audacity to think that we're just THE sh*t - no wonder we're so roundly hated by so many.

The Muscovites? I quite liked them. They're kinda introverted, but so am I, that's WHY I liked them.  They could be really kind and really gruff at the same time - no nonsense, but with good hearts - I liked that. Here's the thing though; they have NO personal space issues. I had more bodily contact with strangers in three days in Moscow than in a YEAR at home. But ya know, I think that's a comfort zone thing for them. We Americans are the global oddballs for having the 'No touchee" thing anyway. Oh, and if you're in line at the post office or somethin', then you'd better get IN line. The foot-and-a-half or so that we leave each other here just kind of confuses them, and if you leave more than that they'll just get right in it.Pushy? Well maybe, but look at what they've been through in less than 20 years: the Soviet Union collapsed followed by economic crisis followed by war followed by an influx of all the Western cultural flotsam and jetsam that had been held back for so long - overwhelming I imagine. I see it like this: they're so used to having to work hard for (to fight for really) everyday stuff that it's a matter of  "look, I need this. If you aren't gonna get in there and get it, I will". Back to that no-nonsense thing. Once you get used to it, it's fine. You even start to do it yourself. "When in rome..."

Here's a fun tidbit. That Scorpions song... "Wind of Change"...
 "Follow the Moskva
  Down to Gorky Park..."
Yes, I'm old - go find it on Limewire or somethin'.
Anyway, I DID that - not because of the song. I didn't know those were the lyrics 'til I looked 'em up when I got home. It was a Ef-in' HIKE too. IN THE RAIN! *shakes a fist at the heavens* On the map it just looked like a pleasant jaunt...WRONG! But I did get to see a VASTLY huge statue of Peter the Great up close. 95 meters tall y'all ( that's 311 feet ) - the Statue of Liberty is only 151 feet (305 feet if you count her pedestal). This thing is so big it's kinda surreal. My brain couldn't figure out how to take its big-ness in. A statue the size of a 25 storey building  just short-circuited it.

Oh, and half way around the world, what does the stupid American do?...Go to McDonalds...Not kidding, check the pics.

So that's Moscow. You walk your feet off and see some amazingly beautiful stuff.

Would I do it again? Sure, why not. Only this time I'm eatin at Sbarro.