"back on the road again feelin kinda lonely and lookin for the right guy to be mine?friends say im crazy cause easily i fall in love gotta do it differently. this time"

- "someone to call my lover" Janet Jackson


thats exactly how i am. i fall for guys and get attached VERY easily.and its funny cause my best friend JUST called me dumb for doing that so much. cause right now im stuck on a guy that i know is only gonna hurt me but theres something about him that has me sooo fascinated with him. reminds me of the song ("rehab" by rihanna.lol) right now im growing VERY impatient when it comes to finding the right guy. i just want a hug and delightful company; you know, talking laughing, having fun with a guy....but if i do that then im gonna fall hard  for someone like i always do.

im a very old fashioned type of girl. i dont like this "fuck buddy" "friends with benefits" mess. cause thats what it is... a huge, hot, herpe,emotion,confusion infested mess.because i get too attached to people to do something like that. doing something that people IN LOVE are supposed to do.. and then just completely forget about that person and go on to someone else... i cant do that. i dont like square dancing.. lol its nasty,confusing,  emotions get mixed up in it.. and most important i REFUSE to share my man with another girl(s). oh HELL no... i am not a polygamist whether voluntary or involuntary..bish BYE go get your own man! please get away from me with that BS, it is far too much going on with STDs and AIDS to be doing that foolishness....knowingly.

i dont know what to do. im too impatient to wait on a guy. it took me 16 years to do that at first and i dont wanna wait another 16 years : (  it really REALLY hurts cause i found the guy that i think is completely perfecto for me.in every way.... the problem is that he lives like 2,000 miles from me and arrangements would be nearly impossible. if he ever lived here.... best believe it'll be a wrap and other men would be completely ignored as if hes the only man who exists in the world. but it cant happen.

"maybe we'll meet at a bar/he'll drive a funky car/ maybe we'll meet at a club/ and fall so deeply in love/ he'll tell me im the one/ and we'll have so much fun/ ill be the girl of his dreams maybe......" <----also from 'someone to call my lover'

::sigh:: maybe ill just wait a little longer and see what happens.

advice? comments?