...if you're short, fat, ugly, sexy, beautiful, gorgeous, twisted, crazy, neurotic, or just plain lonely and bored while surfing thru Myspace.com, collecting add requests - 'cause we're caught up in this TRUE MATRIX like some chosen one, tryna break out

-> everyone just wants to be loved by someone other than who already does...

What's your opinion?


I was also sent some interesting reading:

With the divorce rate over 50Àtoo many are apparently making a serious mistake in deciding whom to spend the rest of their life with. To avoid becoming a "statistic," try to internalize 10 insights.

1. You pick the wrong person because you expect him/her to change after
you're married. The classic mistake. Never marry potential. The golden rule
is, if you can't be happy with the person the way he or she is now, don't
get married. As a colleague of mine so wisely put it, "You actually can
expect people to change after their married...for the worst!" So when it
comes to the other person's spirituality, character, personal hygiene,
communication skills, and personal habits, make sure you can live with
these as they are now.

2. You pick the wrong person because you focus more on chemistry than on
character. Chemistry ignites the fire, but good character keeps it burning.
Beware of the "I'm in love" syndrome. "I'm in love often means, "I'm in
lust." Attraction is there, but have you carefully checked out this
person's character? Here are four characteristics to definitely check for:
a. Humility: Does this person believe that "doing the right thing" is more
important than personal comfort? b. Kindness: Does this person enjoy
giving pleasure to other people? How does s/he treat people s/he doesn't
have to be nice to? Does s/he do volunteer work? Give to charity? c.
Responsibility: Can I depend on this person to do what s/he says? What
s/he's going to do? d.
Happiness : Does this person like himself? Does
s/he enjoy life? Is s/he emotionally stable? Then ask yourself:
Do I want to be more like this person? Do I want to have a child with this person?
Would I like my child to turnout like him or her?

3. You pick the wrong person because the man doesn't understand what a
woman needs most. Men and women have unique emotional needs, and more often
than not, it is the man who just doesn't get it. Jewish tradition places
the onus on the man to understand the emotional needs of the woman and to
satisfy them. The unique need of a woman is to be loved. -to feel that she
is the most important person in her husband's life. The husband needs to
give her consistent, quality attention. This is most apparent in Judaism's
approach to sexual intimacy. The Torah obligates the husband to meet the
sexual needs of his wife. Sexual intimacy is always on the woman's terms.
Men are goal oriented especially when it comes to this area. As a wise
woman once pointed out, "Men have two speeds: on and off."
Women are
experience-oriented. When a man is able to switch gears and
become more experience-oriented, he will discover what makes his wife very
happy. Then the man forgets about his own needs and focuses on giving his
wife.

4. You choose the wrong person because you do not share a common life goals and priorities.
There are three basic ways we connect with another person: a) Chemistry and compatibility,
b) Share common interests, c) Share common life goals. Make sure you share a deeper level
of connection that sharing life goals provide. After marriage, the two of you willeither grow together or
grow apart. To avoid growing apart, you must figure out what you're living for while you are single-and
then find someone who has come to the same conclusion as you. This is the true definition of a soul mate.
A soul mate is a goal mate . . . two people who ultimately share the same understanding of life's purpose
and therefore share the same priorities, values and goals.

5.You choose the wrong person because you get involved sexually too
quickly. Sexual involvement before the commitment of marriage can be a big
problem because it often precludes a fully honest exploration of important
issues. Sexual involvement tends to cloud one's mind. And a clouded mind is
not inclined to make good decisions. It is not necessary to "test drive" in
order to find out if a couple are sexually compatible. If you do your
homework andmake sure you are intellectually and emotionally compatible,
you don't have to worry about sexual compatibility. Of all the studies on
divorce, sexual incompatibility is never cited as a main reason why people
divorce.

6. You pick the wrong person because you do not have deeper emotional
connection to evaluate whether you have a deeper emotional connection or
not, ask: "Do I respect and admire this person?" This does not mean, "Am I
impressed by this person?" A Mercedes impresses us. We do not respect
someone because they own a Mercedes. You should be impressed by qualities
of creativity, loyalty, determination, etc. Also ask:"! Do I trust this
person?" This also means, "Is he/she emotionally stable? Do I feel I can
rely on him/her?

7. You pick the wrong person because you choose some one with whom you
don't feel emotionally safe. Ask yourself the following questions: Do I
feel calm, peaceful and relaxed with this person? Can I fully be myself
and express myself with this person? Does this person make me feel good
about myself? Do you have a really close friend who does make you feel
this way? Make sure the person you marry makes you feel the same way!
Are you afraid of this person in any way? You should not feel you need to
monitor what you say because you are afraid of how the other person will
view it. If you're afraid to express your feelings and opinions openly,
there's a problem with the relationship. Another aspect of feeling safe is
that you don't feel the other person is trying to control you.
Controlling
behaviors are a sign of an abusive person. Be on the look out for someone
who is always trying to change you. There is a big differencebe tween
"controlling" and "making suggestions." A suggestion is made for your
benefit.

8. You pick the wrong person because you don't put everything on the table.
Anything that bothers you about the relationship must be brought up for
discussion. Bringing up the uncomfortable stuff is the only way to evaluate
how well the two of you communicate, negotiate, and work together. Over the
course of a lifetime, difficulties will inevitably arise. You need to know
now, before making a commitment: Can you resolve your differences and find
compromises that work for both of you? Never be afraid to let the person
know what bothers you. This is also a way for you to test how vulnerable
you can be with this person. If you can't be vulnerable, you can't be
intimate. The two go hand in hand.

9.You pick the wrong person because you use the relationship to escape from
personal problems and unhappiness. If you are unhappy and single, you'll
probably be unhappy and married, too. Marriage does not fix personal,
psychological and emotional problems. If anything, marriage will exacerbate
them. If you are not happy with yourself and your life, take responsibility
to fix it now while you are single. You'll feel better and your future
spouse will thank you.

10.You pick the wrong person because he/she is involved in a triangle. To
be "triangulated" means a person is emotionally dependent on someone or
something else while trying to develop anoth er relationship. A person who
hasn't separated from his or her parents is a classic example of
triangulation. People can alsobe triangulated with things as well, such as
work, drugs, Internet, hobbies, sports or money. Be careful that you and
your partner are free of triangles. The person caught in a triangle cannot
be fully emotionally available to you. You'll not be their number one
priority. And that's not basis for a marriage.

Many people are struggling because they have not used what God has given them. God gives you an acorn, you invest it and it will become a tree! Stop praying for trees while acorns are lying all over the ground. God answered your prayer for the tree when he sent you the acorn.