So i have been sick for the past few days and this could be the reason.  Sometimes i feel okay, but sometimes i feel dizzy and tired and cant keep my eyelids up.  But the point being that i am seeing things with my eyes that i have never noticed before.  My neurons are firing in different directions.  At first it was hectic and chaos, but now i see the intricate organization in what i just previously thought was chaos.  There is nothing random.  Everything can be explained with a mathematical equation, we just might not be smart enough to see the ones that are too complex.
    I am full of love and hate all at once and dont have the correct human in which to pass off either of those emotions on to.  There is no one worth loving, but there is also no one worth hating...  For the moment, anyhow...  I shall just have to love and hate myself...

What happens when your dreams start seeping into reality?
When you cover your eyes with the lies
that make you feel so good inside?
Then everything blurs and you cant see the line
that used to divide up space and time

What happens when the air becomes liquid
and you have to grow gills just to breathe in this place?
Its like drowning in nothing
with marijuana puffing
What happens when you lose your face?
When you decide to give up on the rat race?