In the past two or three weeks I have really had a new awakening and awareness to the concepts of the divinity within. For years I've allowed myself to believe this and have rested in a sort of inner knowing that this was true (which relates all the way back to things I read in the Bible as a late-teen) but in the past couple of weeks I've had actual real experiences that allowed me to have a deeper understanding.

One was while jogging. I simply went on my normal run and was using my mala and repeating my mantra internally as I typically do. After about a mile, I turned onto the trail and suddenly without any real forethought, became aware of the energy of all the trees and grass and plants around me. It was as if their prana was so evident and tangible, as if I was swimming in a sea of this tangible prana that was just being exuded from all the living plants around me. It was a tremendous feeling and I felt even dwarfed a bit by this, although I felt safe and secure and totally at peace, as if I were just being wrapped and bathed in this sensation.

I became then aware of this prana entering my own being, not through my breathing per se, but rather as if I were a membrane and the prana just passed into me, as if into my pores and into my being, as if my whole being were "breathing" not necessarily through the mechanism of lungs. (Of course I was still breathing, but I had a real awareness of this prana just passing in and out of me through my being on a horizontal plane.)

I then became aware of the breath, traditionally speaking and I had a sudden vision of a woman named Rebecca from Sudan who exhaled and at the very moment she exhaled, I inhaled and in that cosmic moment, it was as if this were the same prana passing from her to me. No time or space separated this experience but it was as if on this cosmic plane,we were one, not only with each other but with the entire universe filled with prana around us.

This sensation lasted about 5 minutes and I know this because it was about half a mile or so and then I became aware again of my jogging, my pace, my regular breath patterns while running. This experience was over, but I was changed. I have not seen plants, trees or others the same since. I feel a true part of them.

The second experience I do not have time to type about right now,but it happened withhin a week or so of this one and it was equally as powerful in teaching me about my own divinity and that each thing I do is in fact, nothing less than the Divine God in me. I really felt and experienced this and didn't just read about it.

My frustration now is that since these two experiences, I have found myself mired in issues related to my normal everyday humanity --- communications with others, being patient, understanding and all these things that a person who understands they are divine "ought" to understand. It seems as if I struggle, as the Apostle Paul said, with "doing the things that I don't want to do." (modern paraphrase)

Om shanti,

kumari

I