It's because women are emotional instead of logical.  Nice guys dont get the girl, they just sit around and complain to you about how bad the jerks they keep running off with treat them. 

I heard someone say that being the nice guy is like applying for a job, and then they say "We're not going to hire you, but we're going to keep your resume on file and call you every week to tell you how badly all the other guys we've hired in your place are."

I suppose the way to correct this, is to become an asshole.  Assholes dont have their shoulders cried on.  Assholes dont get whined to.  Assholes get pursued.  Assholes get digits. 

See also; Gregor's Theorum. 

 

its beacause women are people like us
 

Also, this is a good post.
 

Stop being a nancy boy, that's the first step.

You shouldn't view the women in your life as dating fodder, because it's extremely tacky. Dating your friends is also a great one-way ticket to Bittersville.
 

Here you go.....

I'm sure that there are at least several contributing factors here. Being that I don't really know you, I will speculate. Here are some personal opinions...

1. Maybe you are looking at the wrong type of girl for you. Let's face it. Porn stars would be fun but are not necessarily the best to date. Quality of person often being an issue.

2. Maybe you are trying too hard to get that girl. Chicks don't always want what they can get but often want what they can't get. That's why they are after you when you already have a girlfriend.

3. Quit trying."Trying" being the key word here. You will find a woman when you are not looking.

4. Are your standards misplaced? Are your requirements for a woman shallow and surface mainly? If that's what you are looking for, that's often what you get.

5. Are you vain? Many women are turned off by vain men. I think that even prissy women like a rough guy. Chicks want a project!

6. Independence. Chicks want an independent guy. Are you independent?

7. Security. Women want to feel secure except the ones that want to be on top. They want to run your life!

 

 

I know it's tough. But maybe you just haven't met the right person yet. In the meantime, just try to enjoy life and not think too hard about this. It'll just depress you.
 

i remember writing something similar a while back.

don;t get discouraged, someday we will find our women and others will wish they were so lucky.

hang in there.

 

I know your pain buddy.  I was the nice guy when I was your age, shit I hope I still am.  Your time will come.  There is no improvement needed, maybe just some small changes.  Don't ever stop being you, you're great man.  Try just thinking of yourself as the guy to date.  Be a bit more aggressive, and less passive. I'm not saying be a jerk or overbearing.  Just be honest and upfront.  Tell people what you think.  If you think a girl is hot just tell her.  I've come to the conclusion that if a person doesnât want to hear what I really think of them then I may very likely not want to be around them anyway.

 

relationships have to start somewhere and honestly that's the best way to start.
 

Maybe you're sending out the wrong signals...  I think you're hot.... 

 

Seriously, don't try so hard to find "the perfect" girl.  You never know; she may already be right under your nose and you don't even see it...  You need to be yourself.  Being yourself may require that you become more independent; i.e. get your own place, get your drivers license and your own car.  Harsh realities, but "bumming a ride off of a buddy to meet a girl and taking her back to your parent's house" may not be the image that you want to project.  Just my humble opinion.

 

Edgar got it:  you need to learn how to drive.  :-P

Seriously though, here's what I can say (even though you know I'm as horrible with advice as you). 

Why is that I am always the guy to go to for advice? Why is it that I am the guy that you can talk to about anything?

Because you're safe.  As funny as that sounds, it's true.  I know I can go to you with shit just because yes, you'll tease me about some of it, but at the same time, you actually listen and care - even when you say you don't, I know you do.  I can tell you stuff and I know (usually) you won't say anything to anyone.  You won't take advantage of me, use me, or do something to hurt me.  That's just not you. 

Girls are stupid; I'll be the first to admit it.  They want to date the hot guy with the superman-pecs, but in the end, who do they go crying to when things go wrong?  People like you.    This should be somewhat of a compliment.  Yes, it's sucky, but trust me, it's a good thing.  You'll continue to have these friends that just keep getting their hearts broken and they go to you about it.  Just do what you do: be there for them.  That's honestly the best thing you can do.  As time goes on, I can guarantee that while they might not be romantically interested in you, they will probably start wishing they could find a guy like you.  Who knows?  That may turn into actually liking you  (look at me and Matt.  Same thing). 

Knowing you to the degree that I do, I think you're looking at the wrong type of girls, dude.  Like someone already said, sure, the porn stars may be great to look at, but I seriously know that you would be completely happy with a geek, because hey, that's what you are.  Try looking beneath the fakes boobs and platinum hair and you might find a winner.  Instead of looking for "girlfriend material," just go look for someone you can have fun being geeky with.   

Also, learn how to flirt.  Seriously, dude, I've never seen you flirt in my life.  Takes tips from Andrew and Edgar, cuz you only give off the "I wanna be friends" vibe, not the "hey I might be interested in more" vibe. 

Also, go watch "Just Friends."  I swear to god, DO IT.

 

 

tony. i dont know what to tell you. . .

 

Dude you need to play the numbers game. Before I met my wife I dated all kinds of stupid chicks and some cool ones but I also had the ones that were just friends as well. It just happens. But being a dick and not being accessable (sorry about the spelling its almost 3 am) can sometimes land chicks and sometimes get you shit. Just be yourself man and you will meet the right girl.

You don't want to put on this fake show and have a girl fall in love with that person because how long can you really go through a relationship that started out as a lie? Just a thought and besides if these girls that are your friends only see you as a friend then fine. I had all kinds of chick friends and this is a good thing. When you go out to a bar DON'T and I repeat DON'T bring a ton of guy friends. Bring the ladies with you. Women will see you with these girls and wonder what has made them interested in you and they will be curious.

Just be patient and soon enough things will happen. If not you can always switch over and bat for the other team although that usually isn't the best option... So i wouldn't recommend that one.

Take it easy man and keep your head up. You are a young cat and have plenty of time for stupid chicks later on. Just live life up.

 

Okay...all this talk about the girls liking assholes and putting the "nice guys" on the shelf is only semi-true.  You see, every guy is both.  Some guys are just more nice in the beginning than others.  Some guys just like treating girls like shit because it makes them feel like "REAL men".  The point is...you don't have to be and asshole to get the girl or a "nice guy" to get the girl; you have to be you.  YOU=asshole+"nice guy"+ TONY-ness(haven't you seen You, Me and Dupree???)

Plus Tony, you aren't the typical "nice guy" all these people are talking about.  You are who you are and if you want to be something else change but do it for you NOT the girls.  And, I believe someone said this, if you look too hard you will OVERLOOK the right person.

Not to be rude/mean but you do have high standards for girls sometimes in the look department.  Oh I know the mind is important to you but sometimes it is the mind that makes a person more beautiful than you may originally SEE.

Also, don't be pressured by your friends(you know WHO I mean) to get a girl.  That shit about you not getting a girlfriend or whatever he says is bullshit.  You have it in you to be THE guy if you would only believe in yourself.

Forget about girls for a while(if you can) and focus on figuring out who you are and what you truly want/need/desire in life, yourself and others.  Make a list of 20 things you look for in yourself and then a list of 20 things you look for in another person(girl).  Do them on different days.  Then, on another day, compare them and see if they support, contrast, complete, compete...essentially if they work together.  If you not...don't sweat it.  Just think about if the most important things work together.  If so... the other things can be compromised...possibly.

Any of this make sense?

~Summer

 

dont worry.......i will never ask u for advice............j/k  most girls go thru a phase where they r only attracted to jerks........continue to b there for ur girls and one day one or all will c u for what u r and probably fall deeply in love with u cuz ur a great guy tony.........u gotta know that!
 

Hmm, well I don't know you oh so much IRL, but from what I know about most dumb females, is that they go for the asshole and not the good guy... and from what I've talked to you.. you're definitely the good guy. I'm not saying be an asshole, lol... just girls are stupid and would rather work for it and have someone hurt them usually, then someone who treats them like gold. It's retarded.
 

Bishop Magic Don Juan says

KEEP YOUR PIMP HAND STRONG!!!!

 

Holy shit you got a huge reply outta this Post...well, I do what my bro taught me:

"It depends on what kinda girl you are looking for. Bitches want to be treated like bitches and princesses want to be treated like princesses. So it just depends whether you want a bitch or a princess."
 

So it's about time for the best friend to jump in here, well first sort of off topic in response to summer, bc we both know i was the one she was talking about I hope u dont feel like I'm pressuring u to get a gf, I'm just lookin out for you bc I know when I'm in a relationship its usually a happy time bc its someone there for you on a higher level then a close friend, and I just want you to get that feeling and also double date action, and back on the subject it seems like everyone is giving u advice which in a way you know ok thats kool bc thats whats goin on for them but no relationship is the same, everyone is looking for different things, but i guess one thing i gotta say is suck it up and talk to them, I know ur as shy as i am there, but damniet that one that ur to shy or scared to go talk to could just pass by and that could of been the one and now shes goin the other way, but like most ppl are saying be urself, ur true aspects will shine through and ppl will see them and the girls that are looking for those aspects will come around and notice them, but another not to say to get rid of the black but just try some other colors from time to time       ok so I didnt read over this so hopefully it made sense, 
 

Because you are the nice guy or the best friend. Some girls dont want the "nice girl" guy, because they are retarded. You just need to take your time and find the right one. So what I am saying OPEN YOUR DAMN EYES and look around, someone might already like you
 

there is nothing to improve on. listen... women dont know what they want. simple as that!