Gosh Darn it!Each time I watch "Armywives"..I can't help but to think of what may of have been or might be the future.Maybe the Army or the Marines..military guys..there's just something about them that is so different. I don't know. I think way too much. I hold things in..feelings and tend to walk away from problems. which is never good, I've learned that the hard way. No matter how much we (people) can feel emotionally attached and connected to another person, we can't change them.The person needs to have the "want to" to change.

I've recently had some distractions..I have the "want to" to change, to grow, to become closer with God. Though, I've realized that keeping the purity, isn't easy by any means. The more you do, the more it's going to be harder to be pure. I got that sentence from the "Sex 180" book. Really..sex is everywhere, on the televison, the radio, ads, it's everywhere. Thinking is the same of doing. I'm not perfect, by any means-nope. none of us are, I guess that's what makes us all kinda normal in  a way. that doesn't mean we're all the same though, we all have quirks-things that sets us apart from everyone else. Though we all are trying so hard to be different and crazy (unique), the individual, when really-everyone else in the human population is doing the same exact thing, so all in all, we're all trying to find where we fit into this big puzzle..the mosiacic..we're all different, yet fit together so beautifully.

I've started training for cross country. I went on a long distance run on Saturday morning-boy was it hot out!!I sure do feel the pain now.. Pain is good though. I went on another run today. It was about a quick 15min run though. You see, when I left the house, the sky was looking kind of gloomy, knowing well-aware that a storm was approaching-I had to get this one run in today-if I didn't, I would only be slacking more. so, I ran, despite the oncoming weather.As I came out on the main road (610), I was listening to my Ipod, when I could have sworn that I had seen lightning flash..the dark clouds were rolling in-and I didn't have that much time. I knew if I were to turn around and head for home..I would get caught in pouring rain with the thunder and lightning all around me. The smartest thing to do at that point was to move forward. It's amazing to me, because..behind me-I saw these dark grey clouds..sad and gloomy, though ahead of me-I saw AMAZING clouds, the sun had perfectly outlined it in such a way that had not a person not see the other side of the sky-They might just think such a glorious sight. Isn't that way in life though..one moment it can be oh-so nice and next, destructive or depressing. Or maybe it could be knowing someone, thinking you may know them and then..they change into someone, you've never seen before.life is full of moments, It's seeing the good in the bad situations that makes the difference. Back on the run, I moved forward and took a turn back into my neighborhood. I turned off my Ipod and started singing (how he loves us-look up the song on youtube or godtube..it's so amazing)..I don't usually sing on my runs..usually because it's hard enough to breathe as it is. The storm caught up to me, there was no way to out-run it, though God did hold off the rain until I got to my house. I went inside. I'm always saying to go out in the storm, don't wait for it to pass, dance in the rain. I was in the middle of my back yard-in the pouring rain, jumping in puddles, dancing, waving my arms in all different directions...even when all the while it's was storming, thunderclaps from one to another. This was different, for the first time, my mom didn't stop me from going outside-into a storm.I felt like a kid again. I needed that. When we were kids, we didn't have to worry about where to go to school, college money, jobs, gas money..etc. Life was simple, being a kid, was such an awesome experience. when we were children, we all saw everything being so big and tall..yet as we grow and become stronger, we realize that those things that used to be so awe-inspiring, aren't so anymore. I think that I can sometimes can get so caught up in the busy-ness of life that I forget sometimes to see the small wonders of the earth. The GREAT things God has created. well..

I have to wake up early for another run in the morning and VBS will be tomorrow..some 450 children are signed up!I'm kinda excited.