Since i was younger and my Grandpa died i've always thought that the worst thing that could happen in life is to have someone you care for die, but i realize that's not the case.  Even worse is that you care for someone, and you'll be 30 minutes away, but not be able to see them for a long time.  Sure eventuall you will, but you will have a blank time in your life when they're not around.  You can't grow up with them, and you have no idea what will happe in their life.

Over the last few months i've been trying to find out who i am, and who i want to be.  I've realized that now that i hate who i am, and who i'm turning into.  I want nothing but to change who i am.  I want to be less like who i'm turning into, and into what you've become.  The last 8 months that we've been hanging out i've seen all sides of your personality, from happy to sad, and everywhere in between.  I'm going to miss you more then anyone that has left that i've ever come into contact with.  You've impacted my life in such a huge way.  You've taught me things i will never forget.  You can guarantee that in a year and 9 months i'll be at your place.  i love you buddy, and dont worry about a thing.  I WILL NOT let ANYTHING happen to her.  Your last request was to make sure she stays safe.  I will do anything to keep that true.  you'll make it through this, nothing will happen.  I promise, i will do what ever it takes to make sure everything stays where it is.  The rest of my life i'll remember what happened and keep it in my heart.  i love you, i'll see you when i can...