i've donefuck all over the weekend. i've got wrist problems, pinched a nerve in my shoulder fucking with grand theft auto. ran into submarine @ harris. she gave me her number again. hung out with her today, realized that what she said to me was right: i am too good for her. same shit, just delayed by a few years.


job stress, meh. not bad, i'm managing it well, but tomorrow may be pure muderation. done no yoga, gaining weight. knees hurt wrist hurt. fuck. praying I have some alcohol in the fridge. drawing an epsom salt bath, burning some incense. 20 min. in the heat, then under my ceiling fan should relax. me.

went out to get new boxers and to retry boxer briefs. was smart. buy one pair, test tomorrow, bring along an emergency pair of boxers just in case. from the store, tried them on.. felt good. washed, will see if they shrunk up too bad. scared. I've called boxer briefs COLOMBIAN NUT HUGGERS. pincy, constrictive, hot. Still, i hear that they will help you keep your erection better, since the dick is pointing up all day. (no, seriously.) Not that i have been using my dick any time soon.

Even if job is great, if I can't get any pussy in Pittsburgh, I really have to leave. Seriously. I'm just quite irritated by all of this. Throw that in, plus job stress. it may explain my eating habits as well. No exercise, i probably eat to take my stress down, since you get that eating rush. Disgusting. i'm going to see about yoga classes @ work tomorrow, and will perpetually block out that time as "unavailable" on my calender in perpetuity. maybe i'll meet some folk there. that may be cool.


really fucked up . last week, went to a bar, got hit on by gay professor that i know has hiv. he bought me two tequila shots, told me that yes, black men really are bigger... and that he knows this since he's fucked around 600 men total, even said he sucked our bartender's dick too. Said not necessarily length, but girth. said he sucked straight guys too, they come back for 2nds, since he does it better than their girlfriends. I know that is true. Women are not committed to cocksucking, so they do that ice cream cone shit, with is pretty pathetic.

This professor says he's all up in that. Says he trained his throat to suspend gag reflex, he takes in the dick and the balls, even does two dicks at a time. Imagine hearing this if you are straight and drunk. He got a little touchy feely. I'm not about to hit him or anything, but i was a little icky. After he touched my hands, they started itching a bit. I thought it was my mind fucking with me, so run to the bathroom to wash the AIDS off my hands. Thought I was being weird, then realized that this cat does coke too.. so it probably was watever he was into earlier in the night. came back from bathroom, he was sweating a ton. talked about how his mother made hominy grits, though she was scandinavian, how he wanted to be my friend and invite me to his house for indian food cooked by him. said his best friend taught him. asked who that was, said it was a woman who played him out once she got her arranged marriage. figured as much.


Weird thing, submarine's ex-bf was know for doing freaky shit for coke, so in aweird 3 degree separation thing, i used to like submarine, who date ex-bf loser, who fooled around with professor for cocaine. what a waste.


professor said I was good for a straight guy, not getting all emotional with his rambling. I figured, eh, he's hitting on me, I know he must be totally fucked. His friend came by and got him, took him home... or tried to. Friend came back and said he almost dropped professor into a ditch till one of the wait staff gave them a ride home. time to go. buzzkill.

Other shit has happened to me as well. met a girl on match. she's a loser. told i'm straightforward, gave her my number, she asked me "why are you on match?" well duh, same reason you are. if my profile didn't answer the question, what gives? she's 34, so her bio-clock is ticking.. blah blah, she's on a schedule and timid. No time for that bullshit. Erotica is one of her turn-offs, so i guess another woman, if i sold my self short to mess with, that i may have to engage in bi-monthly sex with. How utterly boring. Probe and probe and test, and ask. Does anybody have any guts anymore? Meh.

Going to tub now, will return later this week with more griping etc. Cannot wait to see how well the COLOMBIAN NUT HUGGERS work out tomorrow. I'm a boxer man.. or i am a man who wears nothing at all, Mel-Gibson Style......